Lust flips to confusion in his eyes. "You have?"
"Yeah."
"I…this is wrong," he says, pulling away from my touch. "This cannot happen. Not-not like this. Not now. I'm sorry. I should--" He leaps from the bed and backs out of the room as if I was about to suck out his soul.
I lay still with shock for a second, trying to figure out what happened. Instinctively I know what I have to do. What I should have done weeks ago but was too afraid to. I jump out of bed and run to the galley. He is at the top of the stairs being pelted by rain when I shout, "You're not crazy!"
He spins around. "I'm sorry?"
"I said you're not crazy," I say, taking a step toward him. "And you're not imagining this." Another step. "I feel it too."
We stand staring at one another for a second, his body trembling a little as those words and their meaning penetrate that genius brain of his. His eyes search me to see if this is real, that this is really happening. I take another step. A mistake. He rockets up the hatch into the storm. "Jem, wait!" I rush over to the hole but am greeted by nothing but a face full of freezing rain and darkness. Shit.
He's gone.
CHAPTER TEN
Bad Seed
He gets one day. I give him a day before chasing after him in earnest. Enough time for him to process, assimilate, and figure out what he wishes to do next. At least that's what I assume he was doing because he sure as hell wasn't returning my calls, e-mails, or texts. I even drove by his building, leaving a note with the doorman, and his secretary Miranda assured me she gave him my messages. I've never been one to be ignored, especially with something this important. It's the lioness in me. So he's got thirty-six hours before I throw on my best dress, get my hair blown out and stylized, and strut into the hospital ready for battle.
Since the direct route has failed, I have to get creative. Once more being on the hospital board proves useful. I order one of the nurses in the ER to page Jem. Three agonizing minutes later he hustles in, as always hair as unkempt as the rest of him. The nurse gestures in my direction. One glimpse at me, and his face falls. Not the reaction I was hoping for. As I walk over to him, he glances around the room for an escape route. He is no fool. I say the words every man dreads: "We need to talk."
"Not here."
"We can use the small conference room. It's isolated. No one will hear us."
"I--"
"Please."
He's silent, then, "Fine."
I breathe a literal sigh of relief. That was easier than I thought. Didn't even have to pull out the big guns: begging or eye fluttering. He follows me out of the ER, through the main entrance foyer, and down another hall off to the side. This conference room overlooks the Falls and river walk through big bay windows on this bright, blue day. Hopefully the majesty of Mother Nature will promote a calm productive conversation. He closes the door.
"You didn't return my calls," I say.
"I know. I had no idea what to say to you." He pauses. "Have you told anyone?"
"Of course not," I spew out, more than a little offended. "How can you even ask me that?"
"I-I'm sorry. You're right. I don't know why I…" He shakes his head and looks down at the carpet. After a few seconds, he gazes at me with an apologetic smile. "How long have you known?"
"I figured it out when we were working on the missing explosives. When I was giving you the massage, I saw your eyes. I'd know them anywhere." I smile. "Lexie and Brendan took longer."
Those same eyes bug out of his head. "Wait, you--" His mouth snaps shut.
"I'm not an idiot, Jem. The only reason I never figured about Justin was I spent all of ten minutes around Justice my whole life. I've spent days with all of you both in and out of uniform. Plus there was the whole Independence angle, and Lexie practically pushing the two of us together even though she barely knew Jem Ambrose. Danforth's party was a set-up, wasn't it? She gave us both makeovers, forced you to go, then ditched me so you'd have to drive me home. Right?"
"I-I didn't know about that last part. I just knew you'd be there. I-I was actually surprised she wanted me there. We have a strict rule about our real selves fraternizing. We avoid each other socially as much as possible. There are no ties between us for safety reasons. We've only broken the rule once so Lexie and Brendan could publicly meet and begin dating. I couldn't even attend their wedding."
"Then I'm flattered, I guess. You guys risking your secret so we could…you know."
We stand in silence for a few seconds just staring at the other neither of us sure what to say next. His face falls a little. "Why didn't you say anything?"