“Because losing Rosa”—even after all these years it was still difficult to say the woman’s name—“nearly killed me. I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you, too. I had to make sure you were alive. I had to know that you hadn’t died out there on the battlefield. I had to know. It was the only way I could stay sane.”
“But I never knew”—he shook his head—“I meant anything more to you than a fleeting acquaintance. I suspected you loved Rosa.” Good Lord, more than he’d ever know. “But I didn’t think you—”
“I adored you,” she told him. She had no pride left. No shame. “I adored everything about you. The very ground you walked on. Which is why I had to make sure I hadn’t lost you, too.”
And just as it’d done all those years ago in that hotel room, his throat seemed to stick over a swallow. He was no longer lounging back on his hands, his legs stretched out in front of him. Now he was sitting forward, his black eyes drilling into her as surely as that pesky woodpecker continued to drill holes into her favorite sycamore tree back in DC. She almost winced under the sharp force of his gaze.
“And now?” he asked, his voice hoarse.
She knew what he was after. And considering all the years of lying, she felt it only right, only fair, that she give him this one irrefutable truth. “Oh, Carlos. I still adore you.”
Chapter Sixteen
Had Steady ever felt such unfettered joy? Had he ever known such unmitigated bliss? It was like he’d taken a hand grenade of happiness to the chest, his heart blown wide open. And, sí, for a moment there, and despite what he’d told himself standing out in the rain, he’d allowed old hurts, old insecurities to seep in. But Abby…wonderful, delightful, beautiful Abby had obliterated all his self-doubt with four little words.
I still adore you…
His instincts took over before he formed another thought. Grabbing her wrist, he pulled her into his lap, cradling her against him, holding her as close as he’d always dreamed. Overwhelmed with the desire to get closer still. As close as a man and woman could possibly be… “Abby,” he whispered her name, peppering her face with kisses. He drank the tears from her skin, reveling in their salty sweetness on his tongue. “Oh, Abby, I’ve always adored you, too, cariño. From the first day I met you, you’re all I could think about. Dios, how I wanted you. It drove me mad.”
He wasn’t aware she’d been squirming, struggling in his embrace, until she suddenly stilled, going stiff as the scalpels back in his duffel bag. He lifted his head to look down at her, not surprised to find her eyes wide. But the fragile, volatile expression on her face gave him pause. “What is it, neña?”
“Y-you wanted me? All those years ago, you w-w…” She didn’t go on, simply shook her head in disbelief. He smiled down at her, loving the way her wet hair curled around her face. Loving the faint pink color of her makeup-free lips. Loving how her long lashes turned from dark brown near her lids to blond up at the tips. Loving her.
“Of course I did,” he told her, bending to kiss her nose. “You were like this delightful, spritely, incandescent thing capable of lighting up the whole world. I was a moth to your flame, Abby. Surely you knew that.”
And he was accused of being reticent with details? Well, how about them details? He’d damn near waxed poetic! Hooah!
She shook her head. Then, in consternation, he watched her face crumble before she buried her nose into his bare chest.
“Hey, now,” he murmured, rocking her from side to side, patting her narrow back, taking pleasure in her smallness, in her nearness. “What’s this all ab—”
That’s all he managed before she pushed back to look at him, her green eyes puffy and swollen, the tip of her nose shiny. The poor woman was a mess, no joke. And, at the same time, he’d never seen her looking more beautiful.
“I didn’t know.” She shook her head. “Why didn’t you ever say anything?”
“You were so young, Abby. Too young. And even if that wasn’t the case, I was a nobody. And you were the soon-to-be president’s daughter.”
“Why do you keep saying that like it’s a thing?”
And although he didn’t think it was possible to love her any more, those simple, heartfelt words had the warmth in his chest, the joy in his heart expanding tenfold. “Because, to most people, it is a thing.”
“You’re crazy,” she insisted, catching her bottom lip between her teeth. His teeth itched to do the same. Catch that plump piece of flesh between them before he reintroduced his tongue to hers. “If anything, you were…are…the one who’s too good for me.”