"Darcy!" Einstein squawked.
"Shut up you stupid animal."
I opened my mouth to tell Neala to leave Einstein alone, but it turned out my bird could hold her own.
"Fuck you, Neala."
I burst out laughing.
It was perfectly timed, and used in the perfect situation.
"I hate this bloody bird!"
I loved that bird.
I had a big smile on my face when Neala stormed back into the living room. She stood in the doorway with her hands on her hips.
"Tell her to shut up!"
I chuckled, "I can't. She doesn't know what the words mean. She is only repeating things she has memorised, that's all."
"That's all? You taught a parrot to tell me to fuck off!"
I burst out laughing, "Yeah, I know."
Neala scowled at me. "You're unreal, do you know that? I thought I couldn't stand you more than I already did, but yet again you proved me wrong."
Yeah, the way she was looking from my eyes to my stomach showed how much she couldn't stand me.
"Then leave. The door is right there, I don't want you here anyway."
Neala snorted. "I don't wanna be here either, sweetheart. As soon as I find the doll I'll be on my merry way and you can get back to semi naked Saturdays with your parrot."
Oh, feisty.
"I can get fully naked right now if you want a more full on naked Saturday?"
"Spare me," Neala said with her hand held up. "I don't want the sight of your bare body to make me sicker than it already has."
My body made her sick?
"Oh, is that what that look on your face is?" I mused.
Neala straightened. "What look?"
"You keep staring at my stomach, my trousers, and my chest. I must be very repulsive for you to keep looking at me the way you do," I said, sarcastically.
Neala swallowed. "I wasn't looking-"
"It's not nice to lie, Neala Girl. You of all people should know that," I cut her off.
The jab about lying brought me right back to when we were kids. Anytime I pulled a prank on Neala and I would get caught, I would make up a lie and blame it on her and ever since those times she has hated lairs and lying in general. I always enjoyed pointing out when she was lying, or trying to lie.
The look on her face was priceless.
Neala closed her mouth, blew a large amount of air out through her nostrils and shook with anger as she glared at me. "I'm not lying, and stop calling me that!"
Never.
I grinned. "Weren't you leaving?"
Neala snarled, "I will after I find the doll."
I winked. "Good hunting."
This set Neala on a two-hour hunt in the house in search of the Fire Princess doll. After an hour or so of listening to her complain and curse me, I went into the kitchen and had some breakfast. I cooked some eggs, bacon, sausages and pudding and sat down and ate my little fry up. I asked Neala if she wanted me to make her some food, but she just told me to fuck off so I did just that and had my own meal. She eventually came into the kitchen when she was hungry though, she stopped her search for the doll to have some cereal, but it was only a mini break she was taking then she would get back to her search - her words, not mine.
After breakfast I was stuffed and felt drowsy. A large meal always made me sleepy, but I was mainly tired from not getting much sleep during the night so when I went back into my living room and settled down on my couch I closed my eyes and dozed off within seconds. I opened my eyes when I heard a loud bang, then Einstein's squawks. I sat up right and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. I wasn't sure how long I slept for so I glanced to the clock in my living room wall and shook my head. It was after five in the evening. I wanted to go back asleep, but Neala's cursing in annoyance and shouting at Einstein kept me up.
I didn't stand up from the couch after I woke up, I was comfortable and when the house fell into silence I closed my eyes but snapped them open when I heard Neala gasp then squeal in delight.
She had the doll.
I don't know how I knew she had it, I just did.
How the fuck did she find it? I didn't have it out in the open like she did at her house - it was tucked away in my goddamn attic for crying out loud.
Wait.
"Are you up in the bleeding attic?" I shouted.
Silence.
Neala was dangerous when she made noise, but she was lethal when she was silent.
I stood up from my couch and slowly walked over toward the doorway of the living room. When I reached the doorway, I was about to call out Neala's name when she suddenly sprinted by me with a pink box tucked under her arm. She was running for my front door. Her escape was in motion, but I wouldn't let her get away.
Not on my watch.
I ran after Neala and collided into the back of her just as she opened the front door. I grunted when she fell back and took us both to the ground. She wasn't a big girl, but she wasn't as light as a feather either so when her weight slammed down onto my stomach, I dry heaved with the force of it.