I let out a frustrated groan and dropped my purse to the ground. I bent over and started trying to untangle the mess of junk. When I straightened, someone was standing beside me.
I jumped back with a yelp, my hand over my chest.
"Steven?" I hissed when I met his eyes. My heart was racing a mile a minute. "You scared me to death. What are you doing here?"
Steven looked at his feet. "I, uh."
"Come to accuse me of having sex with more people? My boss, maybe? You know how much I like him."
"No," Steven said, shaking his head and looking everywhere but at me. "I came to apologize for how I acted last night. I was wrong. I'm sorry."
I stared up at him. Was he serious? "You are?" I asked.
"Yes. And I'd like to take you to dinner tonight-if you're willing to sit down with me, of course. I understand if you aren't. We need to talk."
"Talk?" I asked. "You're sure you don't want another chance to yell at me? Steven, I want to fix this, but at a certain point, I can't keep forcing something that isn't going to happen."
"I know," Steven said. "Trust me. I get it. I only want to talk tonight. We both need to. Come on, what do you say?"
I searched his eyes. He seemed sincere enough. All that anger I had seen in him at Dante's was gone. Now, standing in front of me, he was more like the Steven I knew and loved. A little bit more somber than usual. Probably because he felt guilty for the temper tantrum he had thrown the other night.
I sighed. "Okay. I'd like to talk, too. But I need to run my car home first."
"Don't worry about it," Steven said, extending his hand to take my bag. I let him, and he gave me a small gracious smile. "I made reservations, and I don't want to miss them. I'll drive you to work on Monday if we haven't come back to get it by then."
"Okay," I said, feeling a little sliver of hope building inside me.
Steven took us to a restaurant neither of us had ever been to before. It was a small place that appeared to be run by a family with an obscene number of children. The staff of twelve was comprised of a mother and father, a grandmother who specialized in the desserts on the menu, and then the nine children who all worked as servers and hosts.
It was dimly lit with candles floating at the top of mason jars filled with water, cranberries, orange slices, and greenery. Everything was rustic and homey, and the whole place smelled like cinnamon and mulled spices.
Steven led me to the back of the restaurant. It was sectioned off into small cubicles. Each little space hosted an intimate private dining area. Steven closed the curtain behind us, took my jacket, and pulled out my chair for me. I sat down, and he tucked me in. I watched him walk around the table and settle into the seat across from me. He scanned the private booth, taking note of the beautiful watercolor painting on the wall and the unique blue and white tiles in the ceiling.
"This place is pretty cool," Steven said. "It used to be an Italian bakery. That's where all the tiles and what-not came from."
"It is different, that's for sure. I've never seen private booths like this except for in some sushi places. Did you do a quick Google search before you picked it?" I asked, smiling involuntarily.
"Perhaps," Steven said mischievously as he swiped his napkin from the table and draped it across his knee. I did the same.
The server arrived to fill our glasses with ice water and offer some wine options. The wine was served with a small platter of cheeses and a variety of bread, which we nibbled on while looking over the rest of the menu to pick our meals.
Once we had ordered, Steven leaned forward with his elbows on the edge of the table. He regarded me with a calm expression and then began speaking. It was apparent to me that he had rehearsed what he wanted to say long before arriving at my work to ask me to dinner.
"Allie," he started. "I behaved like a fool the other night and all the other times before that. First off, I never should have taken your diary. I crossed a line. Just because we're friends doesn't mean I have the right to know all the personal details about your life. Basically, I'm trying to tell you how sorry I am. Sorry, but still concerned."
"Concerned about what, exactly?" I asked. I wanted to make sure I had all the details this time. I didn't want to miss anything. Steven was giving us both a chance to really lay it all out there. I was going to take advantage of it.
"Concerned about you and Andrew. Concerned that if I let myself care now, I'm only going to get hurt later."
"Okay," I said slowly, considering my answer. "I don't have feelings for Andrew. I never did. That night back in high school happened because I was drunk and lonely, and searching for something no one else could give me. It was a stupid mistake. It didn't bring Andrew and me closer together or push us farther apart. We have been the same ever since. I don't care for him. Steven, I care for you. I love you."
Trying to make sense of Steven's passive expression was like trying to read a foreign language. I had no clue what thoughts were racing through that handsome head of his. Finally, he spoke. "Alright. Still, I'm nervous that you are hiding other secrets from me. I can't bear to learn that there is more you have been keeping from me. Not something as big as you and Andrew."
"I promise, Steven, I'm not. I've already told you this. Believe it or not, I want you to know everything about me. I've shared everything with you. Except for that. Because it was my biggest mistake, and nothing I could do could ever change that. I wanted to leave it in the past. I am not keeping anything else from you."
I watched as Steven deflated like a balloon in front of me. It was as if my words had taken the weight of the world off his shoulders. "You're going to be the death of me, Allie Wright."
I grinned. "That sounds to me like maybe you're putting all this behind you? Am I being too optimistic?"
"Quite realistic, actually," Steven said.
I arched an eyebrow. Steven chuckled.
"You're sure?" I asked. "I don't want to do this all over again. I can't fight with you. It's too hard. It nearly kills me every time. Not to mention, Melissa will hunt you down if you change your mind."
"Well, I definitely don't want that to happen. And I'm sure this time."
I stood from my chair and let the napkin draped across my thigh fall to the ground. Steven stayed where he was, looking up at me with a slightly bewildered expression as I stepped around the table to stand beside him. He shifted in his chair so that he was facing me.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"Taking what I want," I replied, reaching out and undoing the button of his jeans.
He looked from me to his fly with wide eyes as I undid the zipper. "Here?" he asked.
"Here."
I pulled the waistband of his boxers away from his stomach and pulled him free. I went to my knees before him and rested my hands on his thighs. I pushed his legs apart so I could shimmy between them. Then I took him in my mouth.
He jerked with surprise when I rolled my tongue over the sensitive part below the head of his cock. I teased him, entirely at ease even though I was sucking him off in the middle of a restaurant. Our server could come in at any time with our meals. The thrill of breaking the rules and taking risks was turning me on. I could feel a heat building between my legs. I wanted to ride him right then and there.
And that's what I was going to do.
I stood. Steven watched as I lifted up the hem of my business skirt. I straddled him, inching closer so that I was hovering above his cock, which was pointing up at my pussy like an arrow. I wrapped my arms around his neck to balance myself and bent my knees, bringing myself down on his lap.
His cock slid into me. Both of us let out whispering sighs of pleasure.
Something felt different this time. There wasn't that little voice in the back of my head reminding me that he might leave me again. I didn't have that nervous feeling in my gut that I usually had when I was around him. For the first time in a long time I felt relaxed, and I wanted to show him just how much I appreciated that.
I rotated my hips gently above him. He grabbed my waist. I leaned in and kissed him, and we stayed like that, our lips locked together while I began bouncing above him.
I could hear the other customers in the restaurant chatting among themselves. Every now and then came the clatter of a knife hitting a plate. I heard a server take an order. An espresso machine was grinding coffee beans.
Steven pulled me down hard on his cock, burying himself deep inside me. I stifled my moan as my body shook with pleasure. My body buzzed with electricity as all my muscles tensed in preparation for an orgasm. Steven sensed it. He held me against him, his lips still pressed to mine, and lifted his hips up. His hands squeezed my ass. He moaned into my mouth.