I laughed nervously, not sure if he was joking, but made a mental note to secure my door when we got back.
We had a surprisingly good time that evening, all things considered. Once away from the house and my father’s watchful eye, Matt seemed more himself, or the self I remembered from years gone by. He was attentive and charming, and it was impossible to ignore the envious glances directed towards me from several females in the pub-restaurant where we had chosen to eat.
‘That’s something I had happily forgotten,’ I informed him, after yet another very obvious what-does-he-see-in-her appraisal.
Matt must have seen the look the woman had given me but he dismissed it with a shrug.
‘Don’t let it worry you.’
‘It doesn’t worry me, it’s just annoying, that’s all. And rude.’
He got to his feet then. ‘I’m just going to see where they’ve got to with the bill.’ But before leaving he dropped a light kiss on my head. ‘Just remember, I’ve only got eyes for you.’
Less than two minutes later, something happened to make me wonder just how true that statement actually was.
I could still see him crossing the restaurant in the direction of the bar when a small humming sound erupted from the edge of the table. Matt’s mobile phone lay beside our empty plates, its slim shape vibrating persistently against the crockery to indicate an incoming call. I glanced up to summon him back but some instinct made me check the phone first. On the small square screen the caller’s identity was displayed in bold green neon like a billboard. I could read it quite clearly upside down, but nevertheless swivelled the phone with my index finger until it faced me the right way up. Cathy. Five harmless letters, but something about them rang a warning bell that had nothing to do with the incoming call.
What was Cathy doing calling Matt? The phone was still ringing with urgent insistence. Should I answer it? Undecided, I allowed my hand to creep towards the small device, but some instinct stayed me from taking the call. Several diners from nearby tables had turned around at the ringing, the sound clearly interrupting their evening. I met their gazes with an apologetic smile but still didn’t answer the phone. Eventually it stopped.
A minute or two later Matt returned, carrying my coat. Now was the time to tell him about the missed call. To ask why Cathy, who he claimed he hadn’t seen in years until the night of my accident, was phoning him on his mobile phone, the number of which I clearly recalled him saying was only given out to his closest friends and family.
It rang again on the way home. We were stationary at traffic lights and he smoothly extracted the phone from his pocket to check the display. An unreadable expression crossed his features as his fingers moved rapidly to disconnect the call without answering it. Intuition told me it was Cathy again, even before I heard the lie in his voice.
‘Who was that?’
‘Just someone from work. It can wait until tomorrow.’
The lights were still on downstairs when we returned, so Matt took advantage of our last moments of privacy on the doorstep as I hunted in my bag for my key.
‘I had a very nice time tonight, Miss Wiltshire.’
I tried to smile but all I could think about was the strange look that had been on his face when the phone had rung in the car.
‘Do you think your dad will come after me with a shotgun if I try for a goodnight kiss on the doorstep?’
And without waiting for my reply, he pulled me against him firmly and gave the sort of kiss that in other circumstances might have left me weak at the knees. His eyes were dark with desire when we drew apart and he didn’t appear to have noticed that my mind had been on other things during the embrace.
I reached into my bag and successfully extracted the key. Walking close behind me as we entered the hall to greet my father, Matt whispered mischievously in my ear. ‘Don’t forget what I said earlier about your bedroom door.’
I hadn’t realised the huge knot of tension I had been holding in check all day, until I was finally alone in my room. I kicked off my shoes and sank down heavily upon the old single bed. Then, alone for the first time, I could feel the edges of the seal begin to weaken, and knew the thoughts and feelings I had tried to bury so deeply in the vault of my mind now refused to be silenced. But there was so much to deal with; so many conflicting emotions, that I literally felt overwhelmed by the deluge. Having to launch straight from the pain and humiliation of Jimmy’s rejection, to fending off Matt, who was understandably bewildered at his fiancée’s tepid response, was too much for a mind to cope with. Let alone a mind, it had to be said, that still believed it owned a totally different past. It was little wonder I couldn’t cope with the present.