“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said again as I glared at her.
“She’ll be like putty in your hands.” She laughed. “And the poor girl has no clue. She’s going to think it’s all her, when you’ve had it all planned out.”
“I don’t know what you’re insinuating.” I grabbed her wrists and snarled.
“Sure you don’t.” She licked her lips, like a cat that had just gotten the cream. “You’d better make sure that things don’t get complicated for you.”
“They won’t,” I said and pursed my lips. “I’ll make sure of that.” But as I stood there and thought about what I had planned, I wasn’t so sure. Mila was going to complicate things. A lot. And not just because I wanted her in my bed. Not even because I wanted her to be my fake fiancée. No, I had to step very carefully now. I had to make sure that everything went smoothly. And step one of my plan was already in motion.
Chapter Six
Mila
October 4th, 2009
Dear Diary,
Something really weird happened today. TJ asked me what I thought love meant. Like seriously. For a few seconds I thought he was trying to tell me he loved me, but I don’t think he was. I think he was trying to talk to me on a deeper level, like I was an adult or something. I said that love is loving someone so much that you think of them before yourself. He then asked if I thought that was truly possible. I said of course. Then he just nodded and said I’d grow up one day. I have no idea what he meant by that. But I think he was saying he doesn’t believe in love. That makes me sad. For me and him. I think that’s a sign that I’m growing up. Scary, but true. That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t screw his brains out if I had the chance. Hahaha, I got that term from a book Sally’s been reading. I don’t really know where it came from. How can you screw someone’s brains out? I’m not sure, but maybe one day TJ will teach me. And maybe I can teach him how to fall in love. One can wish!
Mila
XOXO
Present Day
“So, fun fact, Barbie just barged into the bedroom with TJ and me and demanded to talk to him,” I said quietly as I walked back into my bedroom. Sally sat up with a curious expression and a glint in her eye.
“So, what did she want to talk to him about?” she asked eagerly.
“Well, I can’t read minds, and she asked me to leave before she started talking, so I have no idea.” I shrugged as I sat on the bed next to her. My mind was spinning and all I could think about was TJ asking me if he could come and get me for anything. What did that mean? What was anything? Was he insinuating sex or was he talking about something stupid liking doing his laundry? I could still remember the time he’d come home with Cody and offered to pay me $10 to wash and iron his clothes. The sad part was that I’d accepted his offer gladly. I’d held his shirt to my face like it was some sort of trophy and then I’d sniffed under the armpits and nearly gagged. Maybe that wasn’t the smartest idea I’d ever had. TJ may have been the college boy of my dreams, but I wasn’t sure he’d known much about deodorant in those days.
“You should have listened outside of the door, duh.” Sally said. “Haven’t you learned anything from working in corporate America?”
“Um, I was a receptionist and now I’m basically an assistant.” I shook my head at her. “I wasn’t exactly in the boardroom discussing merger and takeover plans.”
“You guys are merging?” Sally asked in a surprised tone.
“I don’t really know what’s going on. I don’t think we’re merging with anyone.” I bit my lower lip, my head thudding. “I don’t know that business is going great. You know how this economy is. I know Dad and Cody have been worried. That’s most probably why Cody is working late tonight. I think they were going to go over the books. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure things are fine, but I’m not exactly in the know.”
“Oh no, Nonno must be so upset.” Sally looked sad.
“Yeah.” I bit my lower lip and sighed. “I’m not sure he really knows what’s going on.” I leaned back on the bed. “That’s why I feel guilty about asking for an advance. I’m sure Cody will have something to say about it.”
“Yeah,” Sally said. “I’ll lend you whatever you need. Just pay me back next month.”
“You don’t have to do that.” I shook my head, feeling guilty. I didn’t want to borrow from Sally. Nonno had always told me to never lend and never borrow from a friend. And his advice was usually spot on.
“I know that, but I want to,” Sally said with a smile. “That’s what friends are for.”
“You’re too kind.” I laughed and then moved over on the bed closer to her. ‘Do you think I’m making a mistake going after TJ?” I said softly. “Am I a horrible person going after a guy who is kinda seeing someone?”
“Not when that someone is Barbie.” Sally shook her head. “And not when the someone you’re after is TJ Walker. You’ve wanted him for years. I don’t see anything wrong in you going after him.”
“Isn’t that going against the girl code?” I made a face. I didn’t think I owed Barbie anything, but also didn’t want to be one of those shady girls who goes after what she wants without even thinking about the other person.
“Maybe.” She shrugged. “Though, it’s not like Barbie is honoring any girl code. She’s horrible. I don’t know what any guy see’s in Barbie. She’s a bimbo.”
“That’s what they see and like.” I sighed. “Big boobs and pouty lips.”
“Ugh, I don’t even want to think about her.” Sally made a face. “Let’s go into the living room. Maybe we can figure out dinner; I’m hungry.”
“Yeah, I could eat something as well.” I nodded and we headed out into the living room. “I was thinking maybe ribs or something.”
“Ribs would be divine.” She nodded eagerly. “Ooh and some pulled pork.”
“And smoked sausage,” I said, my stomach growling. “And banana pudding for dessert.”
“Oh, man, remember that banana pudding we got from Magnolia Bakery when we went to New York? It was so good.” Sally licked her lips.
“Um, how could I forget?” I said, my mind going back to the drizzly day that had changed my life—well, not really my life. It had changed the way I felt about banana pudding. It had gone from an okay dessert to a ‘where have you been all my life’ dessert. “That’s why I said I want it tonight,” I said and I went quiet as I heard footsteps heading towards us.
“I could kiss you all night long.” TJ and Barbie walked into the living room with their arms around each other. All happy thoughts of banana pudding fled my mind. I tried not to gag as I saw Barbie’s hands in his hair, pulling at the ends of his dark silky tresses. “I could kiss you and touch your hair all night.” Barbie almost purred as they stepped next to the fireplace and stood there.
“Yeah, yeah, we heard you the first time,” Sally said, giving them a disgusted look.
“Well, don’t you have good hearing?” Barbie said as she turned around. She gave me a pitying look and then turned back to TJ. “I’m hungry. Let’s go and eat.”
“Sure.” He nodded, the smile on his lips not quite reaching his eyes. In fact, his eyes looked like he was slightly turned off. I tried to make eye contact with him, but when he finally looked into my eyes, he looked like he was having the time of his life.
“You girls hungry as well?” TJ grinned as he looked at us.
“Is that even a question?” Sally looked at me and laughed.
“Yeah, TJ, was that a real question?” I smiled at him, though I was feeling anything but happy as I watched Barbie running her hands down his back. “Of course we want to eat.”
“So I guess this means the romantic dinner you promised me is off.” Barbie’s voice sounded annoyed and she pouted. “You’ll have to make it up to me tonight.”
“Of course, baby,” he said, his eyes never leaving mine as he grabbed Barbie around the waist and kissed the side of her face. “I’ll make it up to you all night long.”
“You’re a pig.” Sally said what I was thinking.
“Well, do you want this pig to feed you or not?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Let’s go,” I said, wishing I hadn’t spent so much money on the lingerie. What had been the point? I wasn’t going have an opportunity to try and seduce him. It wasn’t as if I were going to slip into his room, knowing he and Barbie were going to be getting it on. It made me sick just thinking about it.
***
Sally and I sat in the back of the car on the way to the restaurant. We sat in silence, like two petulant kids whose parents had told them off for something. I stared at the back of TJ’s ear, and all I could think about was how much he annoyed me. It was really quite astonishing that I could love him as much as I did, knowing I couldn’t stand him so much at the same time. It was how I knew I was really in love with him. No mere crush would have kept my attention for so long. Not for someone like TJ, someone who frustrated me so much that sometimes I just wanted to bang my head against a wall.