Forever Pucked(17)

After that Alex backed off, but our mothers were still all over me about  it during the holidays, and I ended up with hives again. Alex has  skirted the conversation since then; he's likely giving me a reprieve.

I know he's going to bring it up again soon, though, and I'm going to  have to gently argue my case for next summer instead of this summer.  When he proposed, he said we could have a long engagement. I don't think  two years is unreasonable. It gives us adequate planning time.

Alex can be particular. He's going to want his hand in all the pies.  Well, his hand only ever goes in my pie, but he'll be hands-on about  this, I know. That's how he was with the engagement party. And he's  going to want it to be perfect. Only the best of everything.

I'll be surprised if he doesn't end up riding in on a white horse,  wearing a suit of armor like he's straight out of a fairytale. He's that  romantic. Sometimes I feel like the guy in this relationship. Like,  after sex, he always wants to cuddle for at least fifteen minutes.  Sometimes I zonk out on him while he's talking.

The buzzer sounds, drawing my attention to the rink, and the guys take  the ice with Alex facing off at center. I love watching him play. My  beaver gets so drooly. And we have the best sex after games, win or  lose. He's needier when they lose and more aggressive when they win. I  like it both ways. I like it all ways, actually.

Alex gains control of the puck and skates toward the goalie. He passes  to Darren, who easily avoids the opposition's defense. Alex and Darren  have been playing together for years, so they know each other's moves.  They should be predictable to their opponents by now, too, but they  strategize every week, devising ways to throw off the other team and  shake things up.                       
       
           



       

Darren doesn't pass to Alex right away; he plays the puck, shifting to  Lance, who checks a Toronto player into the boards as he shoots the puck  back to Alex. I recognize the name on the back of his jersey. It's  Cockburn, the guy Alex got into a fight with last year. He was ejected  from the game, and we had hot sex in the locker room.

Alex is in front of the net now, but his shot hits the post, and the goalie captures it, taking it out of play.

He gives his head a furious shake when Darren comes around to pat his  shoulder. He's disappointed. I'm sure he was hoping for a quick goal to  boost team morale.

The game resumes, but the first half of the period remains goal free,  with several close misses for Chicago. Then Toronto scores with four  minutes left in the period.

Alex isn't happy. He runs an aggressive hand through his hair while he  and Darren close-talk. They're shoulder to shoulder, and Darren's calm  and level while Alex isn't. My man can get agitated when he feels he's  not performing well enough. He hates letting people down.

I'm so busy watching Alex and Darren, I totally miss what's happening on the ice until Lily jumps out of her seat.

She slams her fists against the plexiglas barrier. "Hell yes, babe! That's my man!"

I check out the scene: Randy's grinning widely and getting back pats,  and the score's been tied. I clap and cheer, keeping an eye on Alex.  He's been struggling lately with Randy's place on the team.

Alex says he's captain material. Alex might be more graceful, but he has  to work a lot harder to keep up than he used to. And it's easy to talk  about what he wants to do when he's done playing, but the reality is a  lot tougher to take. He's getting loads of endorsements, and has a few  more years with Chicago, but after that, well, there's never a guarantee  they'll renew, or that he'll have many more seasons on the ice.

I think that's part of the reason he's pushing so hard for a wedding. He  wants something to look forward to. He wants security and to feel  settled because his hockey trajectory is changing. That's the difficult  thing about hockey; it's a short career-hard on the body and the ego.

Alex pats Randy on the shoulder when they pass each other. Randy's smile  is huge, as is Lily's when she turns to say something to Sunny.

The goal is great for Chicago, helping carry them through until the end  of the second period. Unfortunately, Toronto manages another goal while  Alex is on the ice at the beginning of the third, tying the game again.

His frustration with himself is obvious as he trades off with Randy.  This time Randy doesn't score either. I'm not sure whether this is good  or bad. Chicago really needs the win. With three minutes left in the  game, Alex returns.

He gains control of the puck right away, flying down the ice with  singular focus. He wants this so badly; it's painful to watch. He skates  around the players, shifting the puck as he goes. He's so absorbed in  getting close to the net, he doesn't see Cockburn coming at him from the  right.

The guys were talking about him the other day. He and Lance are fighting  for the top spot in the league for number of penalties and most fights.  He makes Alex look like a saint. He's also huge.

Alex sees him as he gets within shooting range, but Toronto defense is  on it, blocking his shot. He passes to Darren, and switches course,  skating behind the net.

That's when it happens. Cockburn hooks Alex's skate and rams him from behind, sending him head first into the boards.

The crack echoes through the arena. I'm out of my seat before Alex hits  the ice. My beer slips from my fingers, and the contents splash over my  legs. The roar of the crowd is deafening. Rage expands and consumes the  Chicago fans, blanketing the arena in an explosive outcry. And I scream  right along with them.

Darren drops his stick and skates to Alex as a ref does the same.

He's not moving.

Alex isn't moving.

And still I scream. Like I'm on fire. Like the world is ending. Like  I've gone insane. I jump and grab for the edge of the plexiglas barrier  that prevents me from getting to him. I'm too short. It doesn't mean I  don't keep trying.

People converge on Alex like metal to a magnet until I can't see him  anymore. Then Randy jumps the boards, stickless. He and Buck skate away  from Alex. I don't understand why, until I follow their path to mayhem  incarnate.

Lance has Cockburn on the ice, and he's beating the living shit out of  him. When he brings his fist up, it's a blur of red. Vibrant splatters  dot the ice. Buck catches his fist on the next upswing, and Randy grabs  Lance around the waist, hauling him off. Cockburn's face is covered in  blood. He might spit out teeth as he rolls to his side.                       
       
           



       

I want to feel something other than vicious gratitude for Lance's aggression, but I can't.

When Lance tries to go for Randy, Randy gets him down on the ice and  holds him there with his forearm on the back of his neck. They knock  helmets. It reminds me of fighting bulls with horns clashing, except  it's helmets and hockey instead. All of this takes no more than a few  seconds.

I'm still screaming and trying to scale the barrier when an arm clamps  around my waist. "Put me down! He's not moving! I can't see him! I need  him!" My words come out in a stream of nonsense through my blubbering.

"Calm down, Violet." Sidney's deep voice is loud in my ear. "Calm down.  We need to go, and we can't do that if you're melting down."

"Vi, honey, we need to go now," my mom says gently, but firmly.

I stop fighting and screaming, realizing they're right. I can't get to  him this way. We have to go around. I'm too panicked to do anything but  take Charlene's and my mom's offered arms.

I need to get to Alex.

My stomach feels like the contents are at risk of reappearing. Sidney  leads the way, and I stumble along behind him. I'm not really carrying  my own weight. It's my mom and Charlene who are managing.

Sunny's terror-stricken voice comes from behind me, along with Lily's  broken soothing. I crane my neck for a glimpse of anything, but I still  can't see Alex. Paramedics flood the ice. Most of them go to where Alex  is surrounded, but one heads for Cockburn. He's moving, so he's not the  primary concern.

Sidney pulls his scout card when we reach security. The closer we get to  Alex, the more frantic I am. I push free of my mom and Charlene, but  one of the security guards grabs me by the arm before I can get  anywhere.

"Let go of me! I'm his fiancée!" I hold up my hand with the monster diamond.

"I can't let you on the ice." His face is hard.

I pull at his hand, but he doesn't loosen his grip. His fingers are like  steel. He's not hurting me, but he could, and I could hurt myself if I  can't calm down.

But I'm not calm. I'm desperate and terrified. My voice is hoarse from  all the screaming. "I need to know he's okay!" Tears stream down my  face, blurring my vision as I gesture toward the ice. The closest I can  get is the plexiglas, so I press myself against it and watch while the  paramedics stabilize Alex's neck with one of those brace things.