“I…uh…” Will stammers.
Landon puts a hand on his shoulder and squeezes. “Relax, man.” Will doesn’t. “Just keep your hands off my girl from this point on and we’ll be okay. Got it?”
I thought Landon would be pissed if he found out about the lap dance. I mean it wouldn’t have been right. His lips have touched their fair share of half the girls here on campus.
Will nods.
The rest of lunch went well. Landon and Will were actually joking around with each other by the end of it.
I’m glad that’s over with.
Landon and I are hanging out in my room after our last class of the day. He’s got his head in my lap and I’m running my hands through his hair.
Landon is restless. “I’ve got something I need to talk to you about.”
I nod and keep running my hands in his hair. “I’m definitely suspended and I have to attend drug and alcohol classes. It’s mandatory.”
I knew this would happen deep down. Landon has been struggling for so long it was only a matter of time before he cracked.
“I also lost my scholarship.”
That got my attention. “You should have known that was going to happen.” I should have known too but hearing him say it makes it real.
“I did.”
“What are you going to do?”
Landon sits up and turns towards me. “Dad is paying.”
My eyebrows go up in surprise. Landon’s parents were always a little hard on him but they did it to push him, to make him a better person. “He is? Is he pissed off?”
Landon sighs loudly. “Yeah, he was but he said he wasn’t going to let my talent go to waste. He was going to appeal it and see what happens.”
Later that night I run into Madison. We walk to the nearby coffee shop and grab a cup of coffee. Things are still a little strained between us but it’s getting better. I haven’t completely let her in and in this moment I need my sister so I try. I just pray she doesn’t throw it back in my face.
“So,” I run my fingertip around the lid of my cup. “I think I might be pregnant.”
Shock registers across her face and then it’s gone. It is a shock. No one would suspect it would be me who would get pregnant. I’m the one who always thinks things through.
“Did you take a test?”
I shake my head. “No, not yet but I will in a few days. I want to give it just a little more time because it started but it was really light and then stopped.” I take a sip of my coffee. “Maybe I’m just stressed out and it’s messing with me.” I wish it were true but I’m not so sure.
Madison watches me for a few moments. “Well, if you want I’ll go with you.”
I smile letting her know that her offer means a lot to me. “No I just want to wait just a little bit longer.”
She nods. “I’ll be here, Macy, when you’re ready.”
Madison and I finish our coffee and we talk about what we’re going to be doing for Christmas. I’m leaving in the morning to go home. It’s not something I want to do right now, not with my sister, Landon, and Cash staying behind but I need to be there for Alexa. The three of them will be home in the next few days.
December 27, 2013
My drug and alcohol classes are set with a little help from my Dad. He made a few calls and set everything up for me. It was one less thing on my plate that I didn’t have to worry about. I’ll start them about the same time classes start back up. The season will be over so life will be a little less crazy. He’s also started my appeal. I’m not sure if it’ll do any good but it’s worth a shot.
I feel like shit that I’ve let so many people in my life down, myself included. If this appeal goes through it will be the best thing for me. It will me my little slither of hope again at making it in life and not being a fuck up.
The morning Macy left campus for winter break she stopped at my door after I sent her a text asking her to.
Macy knocked before she pushed my bedroom door opened. She stepped in and shut it behind her. When she looked over at me her eyes go directly to the whiskey and weed that’s sitting next to me on the bed.
“It’s not what it looks like.” I defended myself.
She nodded and came to stand in front of me. I pulled her down onto my lap. “I need you for this part.”
She wrapped her arms around me. “Whatever you need.”
I looked towards the bathroom and nodded. I didn’t have to say that I wanted to dump it all because she stood up and grabbed the stuff and walked into my bathroom.
She put everything in the sink and leaned on the door near the toilet. “You have to do it, Landon.”