He stood stock-still for a long moment, and I brought my hand around to brush along his back as if to further my case.
“No.” He said it with cold finality and completely divorced from emotion.
I frowned. “You don’t want to?”
“Oh, I want to.”
My lower abdomen brushed against him, and I felt it—he was erect again. I shamelessly used a little friction to sell him on the idea. “I want you, Wil.”
His head bent to rest on my shoulder. “I don’t want something temporary, Jenna. I want more than just once.”
I froze. William lifted his head, his gaze not quite catching mine before skating away and fixing on the middle of my forehead instead. I cleared my throat. “Well, it doesn’t have to be a one-night stand.”
He sighed, stepping back and releasing my hand. “I won’t have sex with you knowing that next week or next month you’ll be with someone else. If I have you, I want it to be permanent. Forever.”
I shook my head. “I don’t do permanent, William. Ever.”
He scowled. “I understand. Good night, Jenna.”
My jaw dropped. Was this really happening? When had a guy ever turned down my proposition to go to bed? I didn’t extend them often—I didn’t have to—but the answer was never ‘no.’ Not until this minute. What the hell?
William turned to leave, but my voice seemed to be caught in my throat. His rejection was hitting a lot harder than it should. I grabbed his hand. “Wait. Don’t you want to just…get it over with?”
He froze in his tracks, his body language stiff, but he didn’t pull his hand away from mine. Slowly, he turned back to me and said, “I’m surprised you don’t understand. You said in the bedroom that it means more to me than it does to other guys. Why would you think I’d ever want it to be something to ‘just get over with’? I’ve had that opportunity before and didn’t take it…” His voice died out and he shook his head forcefully. “Good night, Jenna,” he said, tugging his hand gently from mine. “I’ll pick you up at nine-thirty for the regional market tomorrow.”
“Good night.” I felt a weird lump in my throat as I watched him go. William was stubborn…resolved. I’d already worked those things out about his personality. But he was a man, and he was obviously attracted to me. How long could he hold out? He wasn’t a superhuman, after all. I’d respect his wishes while secretly hoping he had a weak spot somewhere in there.
Alex entered from the kitchen moments after the door closed. She took one look at Heath spread out on the floor and said, “That doesn’t look comfortable. Can you do me a favor and grab the extra pillow off my bed? I’m gonna get a blanket for him.”
When I got back into the living room, she was crouched beside him, trying to roll him over. “Ugh, can you help me with this? I want to put him on his side in case he gets sick, but he’s so damn huge.”
Heath was at least six-four and extremely well built. He must have weighed two-fifty, at least. And Alex was a slight five-foot with a curvy build. I was taller, but stick thin. I had no idea how the two of us were going to move him, but somehow we managed.
“I’m exhausted,” I said, stifling a yawn. “And I have the regional market tomorrow. I’m hoping to make some decent money doing readings.”
“At twenty bucks a pop for fifteen minutes work, I’ll say! I’d do it too if my mom wouldn’t lose her shit about me playing with cartas del Diablo. Speaking of which…when do you start full-time at that? And when are you going to quit the refugee center? I bet they’re bummed you’re leaving.”
Yawning loudly, I didn’t meet her gaze when I said, “I’m about to pass out, cutie. Let’s chat tomorrow.”
I turned to go into my room, but Alex followed me inside. “They don’t know you’re leaving yet, do they?”
Reaching into my t-shirt, I unhooked my bra and pulled it out of my sleeves. “They will…soon.”
“Still don’t have the courage to break it to them?”
I shrugged. “They know I’m strapped for money and they can’t give me a raise. I don’t have the heart to even ask. They’ll understand when I tell them I have to move on.”
Alex cocked her head to the side. “It’s not just about the money, though, is it? Are you really feeling antsy to move on, or is this all just some weird philosophy of yours? It’s like you’re that lady in the movie Chocolat. She always went where the wind took her, too.”
I rolled my eyes. Romantic notions were Alex’s bread and butter. “We’ve been over this before. I do need the money so I can make it back to Maja’s wedding.”