I can’t draw the next breath, and I’m pretty certain I’ve completely forgotten any hunger I had for the food in front of me. She flashes me a smile and apologizes for being late, but says she wanted to do the dress justice. I watch Jenna’s lips as she talks, remembering how she tasted just an hour ago. Sweeter than ever, because she told me she would stay. And right now, all I want to do is take her in my arms and make her mine—for real.
Everyone around us is admiring her and Lord de Bricasse speaks up. “We haven’t had a May Queen this beautiful since…”
Never. I mentally complete for him, though he’s joking that it’s been since the previous Beltane.
After our feast, the fire is lit in the specially designated area for a campfire. And it’s a massive bonfire, the heat singeing our faces and hands. Everyone is clapping and cheering as the flames reach higher and higher. Lord Ryleigh, or “Joe,” as he is known in his mundane life, breaks out his fiddle, and we begin to assemble in the space around the fire.
In the past, I made it a point to leave before the dancing began, because dancing inevitably meant crowds. But tonight nothing will stop me from dancing holding my Jenna—her body close to mine. My face next to hers. The smell of her hair and skin in my nostrils.
We start with easy formations based on English country dancing. Lady Ryleigh, Joe’s wife, is an expert in recreational European folk dance and has taught most of us how to do it. I’ve been brushing up with videos and Youtube.
Without question, I’m paired with Jenna, and I wonder at the lucky coincidence that brought us together as King and Queen. I’d almost start adopting Jenna’s belief in fate if I didn’t find it so silly.
As I watch her, I imagine the tiara on her head instead of the May crown. Determination steels me. Tomorrow, I’ll get it back for her and I’ll humiliate Doug in the process. I don’t care what he thinks of me or what he’s said. I don’t even care that the stakes are high for me, too. Because if I lose, I won’t be able to come back here and be with all my friends. That concerns me, but it’s not the worst thing that could happen.
No, all I care about is getting that tiara back for Jenna. Making her happy. Being worthy of her.
Her thin hands in mine feel good as we clasp them together and spin slowly first to the left and then to the right. Stepping back, I bow and she curtsies ,then we execute the complex but repetitive steps. I find myself looking down at my feet often, which not only helps me avoid tripping over my own feet but also to evade accidental eye contact.
I don’t want to make a wrong move, and I definitely don’t want to step on her toes. I want this night to be perfect. I’ve run everything through my head a thousand times and it should be perfect. We’ll dance. We’ll kiss. And more.
But what if I can’t get her what she needs? What if I can’t be her champion tomorrow? What if I disappoint her? That thought sets my heart beating faster than it should based on this light physical activity. Because now my fears are taking over and they’re all I can see.
It’s getting hard to concentrate. A tightness in my chest is intensifying, and when I look up and feel the crowd around us, I get lightheaded. I squeeze my eyes closed, suppressing a wave of nausea.
My eyes snap open when I’m suddenly jolted in the back. The breath is knocked out of me and cold fear seizes me, making my gut churn. I spin, looking all around me, but see only a blur. People close in around me, loudly talking and clapping. Heads are moving this way and that.
I stop, but the whole world keeps moving. It feels like everyone around me is closing in, and I can’t breathe.
A hand grabs my shoulder and I’m knotted with dread. I tear away from that hold with all of my strength. “Watch your space!”
I see that it’s Ronald, another clan member, and he’s now staring at me, eyes and mouth wide open. People near us are stopping and staring.
“Whoa, friend,” Ronald says, laughing. “The duel isn’t until tomorrow.”
My palms are sweaty and the fear in my throat is cold.
I can’t lose this for her. I can’t. I can’t lose her just as I’ve finally won her.
I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to take a breath, when he pounds on my back. I turn and shove him away so hard that he falls to the ground. The music screeches to a halt, but I’m already running, already moving, pushing through the cluster of bodies.
I need to get out of here. This is a nightmare made reality.
But it just might be that the nightmare won’t start until that duel tomorrow, when I could lose everything.
Chapter 29
Jenna