“Hop—” I tried to break in but failed.
He was angry, furious. His rage filled the room, making it hard to breathe.
And he was on a roll.
“But before I’m done with you, you’re gonna know it all.”
Before he was done with me?
“We were on a break, Mitzi and me,” he shared. “I didn’t know it was a break then. I thought it was over. Before that happened, she got pregnant with Cody and she didn’t let me touch her. Barely even fuckin’ looked at me. Tried everything, she didn’t let me in. She gave me a son, or I thought she gave me a son. Didn’t know, at the time, he wasn’t mine. Then she had him, I was over the goddamned moon, and she still froze me out. Worse than before, far worse. For me, I had a son, he was fuckin’ perfect, I was goddamned beside myself and my woman? She freezes me out? I couldn’t take it. Tried. Failed. Packed my shit. Got out. I’d had enough. Years of that shit. Years of tryin’ to break through. It wasn’t an easy decision. Molly, so fuckin’ little, Cody, just a baby, but I couldn’t take one more day of her fucked up shit. So I left.”
“Honey—”
“Shut it, woman. You bought this, take it.”
I snapped my mouth shut.
Hop glowered at me a moment before he continued.
“I was stayin’ at the Compound, lookin’ for a place. BeeBee was available. I hadn’t had a lay in nearly a fuckin’ year so I took advantage. None of Tyra’s business why. Tack’s. Yours. Anyone’s. I got off. It wasn’t good. It didn’t suck. What it was was a onetime gig, a man fuckin’ available gash with no strings. I was a free agent so why the fuck not?”
“I don’t think Tyra knows that,” I said carefully.
“I don’t give a fuck she does or doesn’t,” he returned.
I fell silent.
Hop carried on.
“Not long after that, Mitzi talked me back. I thought she wanted to give it another shot. What she wanted was someone to help her with dirty diapers and a mortgage payment. She pulled the wool and I wanted a family so bad, to wake up knowin’ my kids were under my roof, I let her. Then, one day, I come home and some woman is sittin’ on our porch. Never seen this bitch before. I get off my bike, walk up to her, she looks me straight in the eyes and lays it out. Everything. Everything I worked hard to get and Mitzi never gave to me. Everything I learned from a goddamned stranger.”
When he stopped speaking and didn’t seem like he was going to go on, I prompted, “What did you learn, honey?”
“I learned why Mitzi was such a cunt. A spoiled rotten, worthless piece of shit who I wasted fuckin’ years with. The piece of shit who was the mother of my children. Or, I found out that day, my daughter. Not my goddamned son.”
I was trying not to hyperventilate and had to concentrate so much on this, I only had it in me to nod.
“She was a cheerleader,” Hop announced and I blinked.
“What?” I forced out.
“This bitch. Blonde. Blue-eyed. Perfectly honed body. Goddamned ponytail in her hair. She was the kind of cheerleader who was gonna hold onto that shit, the glory days, until she fuckin’ died. Or she thought she would until Mitzi blew her life apart.”
I didn’t get it.
Hop didn’t make me ask for an explanation.
“See, back in the day, Mitzi had a thing for the quarterback of her high school football team. She wanted him. Problem was, he was dating the head cheerleader. But Mitzi, Mitzi wanted what she wanted, so she gave it her all to get it. In high school terms, that means she put out. This fuckin’ guy took what she gave, kept her on the side and went to homecoming and prom with his good girl. This was the beginning and until that day on the porch, it didn’t have an end. Mitzi fixated on this guy. He was all she wanted and, way that bitch told it, she went all out to get him. The shit she said, she was not fuckin’ jokin’.”
I kept deep breathing.
Hop kept telling his tale of treachery.
“He went to college, his girl went to the same college, but he still kept Mitzi on the side. And she stayed there, givin’ him what his cheerleader couldn’t or wouldn’t. They graduated, got married, he got a job, kept Mitzi and his wife until his work transferred him to another state. That’s when Mitzi realized it might not ever be her so she had to have a plan B. He took his wife, said good-bye and didn’t look back.”
Hop paused, I nodded again and Hop kept going.
“That’s when I came into the picture. That’s why she never let me in. Pinin’ for that guy. Still in touch with him. Holdin’ a torch, holdin’ onto hope. She led me into a life together knowin’, she got a shot, she’d cut me loose and go for him. He got transferred back to Denver after we had Molly and they started up again. Good news for her, she thought, when she found out his wife couldn’t have kids. She and me, things not good, I wasn’t hankerin’ to make another baby with her until I was sure we were solid and it didn’t look like that would happen, so I was surprised as fuck she turned up pregnant since she was on the pill. But shit happens. I got my son. I rejoiced even if Mitzi was a bitch. My son’s my son, so who wouldn’t rejoice?”