“Thanks, Ash,” I said, absently.
“No probs,” he said. “Chasing zombies on my phone—fair inspirational, aye?”
The article was very short. The picture at the top could have been a mug shot, but on further reading it turned out to be a passport photo. It was better than mine, too—she didn’t look like a serial killer.
She looked like Susan.
I took a deep breath, and read the story again.
American Actress Behind String of Thefts
AP Glasgow
Lothian and Borders Police continue to search for a fugitive who is thought to be behind a series of crimes throughout Inverness-shire and other Highlands districts over the past year. American actress Gail Lee Duncan, known for her facility with accents, is accused of masterminding a string of thefts with losses amounting in the tens of thousands of pounds.
“The woman is a chameleon,” said Chief Inspector Milton Garda of the Inverness Force. “We had her in our custody, but she was released on bail prior to her hearing.”
That bail is now forfeit, as Miss Duncan has not been seen since leaving the Inverness Police station.
“This accused is accomplished at switching identities and has mastered several accents,” the police officer added, “though it’s true her Irish accent is a particularly poor imitation, and in fact it was that which led to her initial capture.”
Duncan, who also is known to go by the aliases Susan O’Donnell and Gaily Dee, is due to stand trial on a long series of offenses ranging from theft to impersonation. Police believe she has fled the country for one of the larger cities down south.”
“I bought her Irish accent,” I muttered, and looked over the paper to find myself staring straight into the substantially irate face of Sandeep.
“What’s this I hear about you stealing newspapers from our customers?” he asked, snatching the page out of my hands and brandishing it at me.
I looked over at Ash, but he’d stowed his game and was ringing through a customer’s bill. I couldn’t quite manage to catch his eye.
I tried to grab the page from my boss’s hands, but he held it behind his back. “It was a mistake, Sandeep. I just—just borrowed it to—ah …”
“Read crap during work hours?” he said, silkily. “Or perhaps learn the techniques required for threatening my customers with a plastic fork?”
I stared at him, speechless.
He shook the paper in my face. “Do NOT let this happen again!” he roared, and stomped off into the back.
“He’s going to read that while he’s taking a shit, aye?” said Ash, pulling his phone out again.
“Probably so,” I muttered, letting my breath out at last.
Susan. Even reading about her got me in trouble. “That woman is poisonous,” I said, to no one in particular. “If I never see her again, I will be a happy person.”
“If I ever get coffee again, I’ll be a happy person,” said an old lady at the counter.
I poured the rest of my carafe into her cup and went off to wipe the tables. But I could not get that photograph out of my mind.
Freaking Felon…
8:30 am, June 27
Nairn, Scotland
Have to type quickly here——the Supposed-to-be-Free Internet Gestapo is marching over from the periodical section toward me at this very moment. I just want to link to this news story. Took me a few days to find it online, but if you ever see this woman——WATCH OUT. She’s the one who stole all my things!
http://www.bbc.com/news/American-Crime-Spree-Suspect
- ES
Comments: 67
HiHoKitty, Sapporo, Japan:
What a terrible criminal to steal from you and other peoples. Her face must be burned in your memory. Will your Hamish hunt her down and put her in hands of police?
GenesieFanGirl, New York, USA:
Hey Emma,
You probably don’t remember me, but we met last winter at an OUTLANDER Fan Fiction event. I’ve been following your blog since then, and have to admit it’s been pretty entertaining. But since you haven’t posted in a while, I figured you might well have given up the chase, having found your Jamie Fraser clone and all.
But in case he turns out to be a dud, (I mean——have you even slept with him yet?) I thought you might like to know the rumor here is that your friend Jack Findlay is retelling the Braveheart story, and it’s all the buzz. Now, William Wallace is truly a man worthy of chasing down! Maybe you’d have more luck getting it on with Braveheart…?
- Genesie
(Read 65 more comments here…)
Genesie. I couldn’t believe she was actually reading my blog. After all, we hadn’t parted on the greatest of terms. If she was still upset with me, though, she’d certainly gotten her own back with the crack about Hamish.