Finding Fraser(11)

That was not the first time I turned to the OUTLANDER books for solace. And it would not be the last. In my heart, I knew the story was really about a woman. A warm, funny, capable nurse who was inadvertently whisked through time and into the arms of a man who would—after a little initial trepidation and some complex plot twists—have and hold her for the rest of her life. Was it so wrong that I wanted him, too? And no less after the insanity of the last couple of days than I had after I’d lost Campbell and his long, perfect eyelashes.

So, there on my hostel room bed in Philadelphia, I re-read the wedding night chapter—my favorite—and then gently closed the cover of the book. Using my elbows, I propped myself back against the iron headboard of the exceedingly uncomfortable bed. Flipped open my laptop, logged onto my site. Typed.





Finks & Fortitude…

9:00 pm, February 22

Philadelphia, USA



I’m not ready to quit yet.

So the trip is on, bitches. And yeah, I’m talking to YOU, Paul, you rat-fink.

White hat my ass.



- ES



Comments: 0





As I finished typing, I noticed there was a comment on the previous posting. It was from someone named HiHoKitty, claiming to be from Sapporo, Japan. It read:

I believe is good you follow your dreams, even crazy.

“Take that Sophia,” I muttered, as I closed the lid of the laptop.

And then I went to bed.





Flurries & Flashbacks…

2:30 pm, February 23

New York City, USA



Would you look at that? I’ve got a comment from someone who is neither my sister nor trying to sell me drugs to cure erectile dysfunction! At first, I thought it was just a bot, but I’ve decided to believe the goodness in human nature sometimes trumps the evil of the Internet. So, thanks, HiHoKitty of Sapporo, Japan. You seriously made my day. Though I have to say I’m not really sure if you are implying my dreams are crazy, or I am. Let’s go with a sane woman following whimsical dreams and leave it at that, shall we?

I’ve made it to NYC, with nearly a full day to spare before the flight. I’m sitting in a coffee shop in union   Square. Last time I was here I was twenty-one. I came to visit New York with a few girlfriends, celebrating someone’s birthday in August. The place had been ninety degrees of steaming and the Square was covered in tourists draped across every patch of available greenery.

Today the view out the window couldn’t be more different. Last night’s storm has stopped, and because it’s Sunday, there’s hardly any traffic. My coffee shop is across from a dog park, and I’ve spent most of the morning watching the local hounds playing in the snow. The dogs don’t care that the roads are blocked. They really aren’t blocked any more, anyway. When I walked here, the snow drifted nearly up to my knees in places, but now I can see the guys at the big grocery store across the square are out clearing sidewalks. A few brave souls are even driving, leaving long brown tire trails in the white streets.

I’ve got something special lined up for tonight. Will share more when I can.



- ES



Comments: 1

SophiaSheridan, Chicago, USA:

Let me get this straight. Your trip to England is not just to get over a broken heart, or run away from a real job. (Yes, I found out you got fired. Paul went down and talked to your ex-boss.) So, instead of facing things like an adult, you have run away to chase a man. And not just any man. A fictional character.

YOU ARE CHASING A FICTIONAL CHARACTER?

Emma, I am really worried. Can you please call? Call collect. Any time. Really.





The bus ride from Philly to New York had been orders of magnitude easier than the last one. Crankiness was a good motivator, and my frustration at Paul and Sophia had made the ride further away from home a bit easier, I guess. That whole worry thing that she played up in the comment section? A ruse. She just wants me home, doing whatever qualifies as normal in her world. Looking after her cat. Available at her beck and call. Standing in as the object of comparison against whom she is never found wanting.

So, right now, maybe the Big Apple is just what I need.

I’d woken up that morning and realized it was my last full day of having a phone plan, so I girded my loins (and all my other body parts) and called my mother to say goodbye. My mom and dad live in Florida now. They took Freedom 55 retirement a few years ago, and Mom told my sister and me that she intends to spend our entire inheritance before she dies. Sophia cheered this wholeheartedly, because at 28 years old, she’s already got her retirement looked after.

Me, not so much.

But I love my mom, and I want her to be happy. Florida makes her happy. It makes my dad sleepy, so that might be a part of it, too …