Finding Forgiveness(53)

“Hunter, look at me,” Roman said softly so they wouldn’t be overheard.

Hunter lifted his gaze from where he’d been rubbing his finger against the tablecloth.

“I told him you were my colleague because I thought you might be more comfortable with him thinking this was a business meeting rather than a date.”

Hunter shook his head slowly. “I’m sorry, Roman. I kept telling myself that we weren’t doing anything wrong by being in public together but all I could think was what would happen if people saw me touching you or looking at you a certain way.”

“It’s okay-”

“No, it’s not,” Hunter said firmly. “Today was so much fun but it felt like something was missing…it was like I wasn’t really sharing it with you because I couldn’t be with you the way I wanted.”

“Hunter, these things take time…”

“No,” Hunter said again. “I don’t want to hide how I feel when I’m with you. Even if being gay was a choice, I’d still want to be with you – I’d want people to know how much I love you.”

“What?” Roman interjected.

But Hunter continued on as if he hadn’t spoken. “I mean, who cares, right? So what if they don’t approve of us being together – they can just all go to hell,” Hunter said as he got more worked up.

“Here we are,” Alphonse said as he reappeared with the bottle of wine.

“Alphonse,” Hunter said loudly enough that there was no doubt the people at neighboring tables would hear him. “Roman’s not my colleague. He’s my boyfriend. We’re gay,” he added for good measure. “And if you have a problem with that, then we’ll take our business elsewhere.”

Alphonse looked back and forth in confusion between Hunter and Roman and Roman just shook his head as he bit back his amusement.

“Oh my, these glasses will not do,” Alphonse stammered as he suddenly snatched the two wineglasses off the table and hurried off, unopened wine bottle still in hand.

“Say it again,” Roman whispered as he shifted around the slight curve of the booth.

“I’m gay,” Hunter said softly as he too shifted until their legs were touching beneath the table.

“Hunter,” Roman grumbled.

“I love you,” Hunter said with a smile as he leaned in to brush his mouth over Roman’s. “So much for finding the perfect moment, huh?” Hunter murmured against his lips.

Roman let his hand close over the one Hunter had resting on his thigh. “It couldn’t have been any more fucking perfect.” Roman didn’t give a shit who was watching as he slanted his lips over Hunter’s and licked over the seam until Hunter opened to him. Hunter didn’t hesitate to kiss him back.

“By the way,” Roman said when they finally separated. “Alphonse is as gay as they come.”



***

Hunter twisted his hands nervously as he waited for Roman to give the valet his car keys. It had been too dark on their drive up from Monterey to Big Sur to see the sights or even the hotel that Roman owned but as soon as they’d driven onto the lush, beautifully landscaped grounds, Hunter had known the place would be a thing of beauty to behold come daylight.

But none of that was really even on his radar as he thought about the night to come. He’d been telling himself ever since Roman had left for London that he would be mentally ready to take the final step to let Roman make love to him once they were together again, but now that the moment was here, he was struggling to not let that one terrible night in the pool room of the gay club deter him. There was no doubt that Roman would do anything and everything in his power to make the experience a beautiful one but with the nightmares that continued to rattle him, Hunter was afraid he’d panic in the middle of the act and ruin any chance he had at giving to Roman what had been given so freely to him.

“You okay?” Roman asked as he met Hunter on the curb. The bellman had already left to take their luggage up to Roman’s room so Hunter nodded and fell into step next to him as they headed for the entrance. After wiping his sweaty palm on his pants, Hunter dropped his hand and brushed it against Roman’s. A thrill shot through him as Roman instantly linked their fingers together. No words were needed as they stepped onto the elevator and if Roman noticed how tightly Hunter was clutching his hand, he didn’t point it out.

The elevator stopped on the top floor of the twelve story building and Hunter followed Roman down the dark hallway. Everything about the décor was fresh and beautiful but also managed to blend modern style with a rustic feel. Roman had clearly made the right choice to rebuild the hotel using the same unique décor that appeared to set it apart from contemporary establishments.