Filthy Doctor(27)

As quietly as I could, I climbed out of bed, opened the door, and listened in the hallway. My dad was snoring away and the light was off in their room down the hall, which meant mom was no longer up reading. With them sound asleep, I walked quietly down the stairs and found Julian standing at the fridge, getting himself a glass of water. I was behind him and he hadn't heard me yet, so to avoid scaring him – and draw any unwanted attention – I spoke softly. Barely above a whisper, but loud enough that I knew he'd hear me.

“Can't sleep?” I asked innocently.

He looked over his shoulder, a bit surprised at my presence, but he smiled. “It's always strange sleeping in someone else's home,” he said.

“Yeah, it's weird when it's not your own bed,” I said. “I always have trouble sleeping whenever I go anywhere.”

“What about you?” he asked. “I thought you went to bed a couple hours ago?”

“I did,” I said, biting my lip. “But I couldn't sleep either. Just too much going on in my head, I guess.”

I gave him my best bedroom eyes, hoping he'd take the hint and understand what it was that was keeping me up so late.

“Sorry to hear that,” he said rather abruptly.

He placed his glass of water on the table nearby, leaning into it and looking at me – really looking at me for the first time since I'd opened the door for him earlier that afternoon. His eyes took me in, drinking me in like a thirsty man drinks a glass of water. It made me feel sexy. Desired. Wanted. Even though he didn't say a single word to give his thoughts away, I could tell what was going through his head. And I had to say, I approved.

I knew that Julian would struggle with the decision about whether to take me to bed or not – any decent man would. I knew he had to be conflicted – he'd known me since I was a child. My dad was his best friend. He was more than twice my age. But none of that made it wrong. We were both consenting adults. We both had needs and desires. And it just so happened that ours coincided. Why should anybody look askance at that?

“Nothing for you to be sorry about,” I said.

I leaned onto the table across from him, staring deeply into those beautiful eyes of his. He truly was a sight for sore eyes. I'd missed him. When I was younger, I would see him every day. Now – not so much. Even though he was much older than I was, he was – and always would be – I thought he was the sexiest man in the world. No college guy could ever compete with him.

Which was why I'd turned them all down and had saved myself for him.

There were a few moments of silence as we stared at one another awkwardly. And yet, expectantly. I could see the struggle in his mind, plain as day. I knew what he was thinking. Knew the arguments and counter-arguments he was having in his internal dialogue. I wasn't sure what I could do to tip his decision my way, but I felt like I needed to do something. Say something. Make sure he knew that this was okay. That this was what I wanted. I tried to convey it through my eyes, through the set of my body, and through the little smile I was giving him.

Julian cleared his throat, looking away, and said, “Sabrina, I think we need to address the elephant in the room. I know you've always had a crush on me – ”

“Oh, it's more than a crush, Julian. Far, far more.”

“Whatever it is, I see the way you look at me. And yes, you're a gorgeous young lady, but this – you and me – we can't work. This can't happen.”

“Why not?”

“Because – ”

“Is it the age difference? Because we both know my mom is a lot younger than my father, and no one sees anything wrong with that.”

It was true. My mom was about ten years younger than my dad, but nobody said a word about it. Sure, Julian was almost twenty years older than me, but the fact remained that age didn't really matter in the grand scheme of things.

“At the risk of sounding like a cliché,” I said. “Once we're consenting adults, age is just a lame excuse to not do something we both want to do.”

“It's not just that, Sabrina,” he said. “I literally watched you grow up, in front of my eyes – ”

“So?”

“So? Your father would kill me.” Julian glanced toward the hallway, as if afraid my dad would walk in on us at any moment. We were still alone, but he pitched his voice lower anyway. “It's not okay, Sabrina.”

“You haven't denied being attracted to me,” I said, standing up tall and grinning as I watched his eyes automatically take in my curves.

“What does that have to do with anything?” he asked. He scratched his chin and looked away again, I knew he was trying to keep from addressing the real elephant in the room.

“It has a lot to do with all of this,” I said. “All your reasons are nothing more than weak excuses. And they're not nearly good enough.”

“Not good enough?” he asked, arching his eyebrow.

“No, not even close,” I said. “Because I see the way you look at me. I can see the thoughts going on in that mind of yours.”

I walked around the table, moving closer to him, but he stepped away. Almost as if he was afraid I was going to bite. Or do something much more delicious – something he wouldn't be able to step away from.

“And let's face it, Julian – I'm not the little girl you watched grow up anymore,” I purred. “I'm a grown woman now. A legal adult. My father can no longer dictate what – or who – I do.”

Julian had backed himself into a corner, both literally and figuratively. He was now pinned against the wall, with me standing in front of him. I smiled as I closed the distance between us and stood close to him – very close. But I didn't get so close that I was literally up in his face. I didn't want to be rude to him, after all. Yes, I wanted to fuck him silly, but I still respected him. Hell, I respected him a lot, and I knew this wasn't going to be easy. Switching his mindset from seeing me to a little girl to a sexual creature was going to be difficult. He had to want it as much as I did – and I was pretty sure he did.

But he had to be willing to live with the consequences – which we both knew existed.

Yes, I was an adult. But my father was his best friend. What I was suggesting was forbidden, though not outright. It was one of those unspoken rules. After all, it wasn't like my parents said I could never get involved with Julian. But on an unspoken but acknowledged level, it was taboo. Something they couldn't have imagined. And I was more than sure Julian himself struggled with that as well.

“When you're ready,” I said to him, speaking softly, “You know where to find me. We're both adults here, Julian. Stop treating me like a child and maybe, just maybe, you'll see that what I have to offer you is exactly what you need.”

I stepped away from him, turning to go back upstairs, when he touched my shoulder. I looked back and waited for him to say something. The conflict on his face was clear. I did feel bad for him in that regard, but he also needed to realize that we were adults, free to do with each other as we pleased.

“Yes?” I asked, eyes wide as I waited for a response.

“We can't do this, Sabrina,” he said, gripping my shoulder tight.

His voice was far less than certain as he'd said it, so I turned around and faced him. This time though, I didn't hold back. I was close enough to feel his breath against my cheek, felt his body pressing into mine. I could tell he was turned on – I felt how hard his cock was as it pressed against my belly.

“Yes, we can, Julian,” I said, stroking his cheek. “We can do anything we want.”

I moved my hand from his cheek down his chest and then went lower, letting it linger over the erection he was trying so hard to hide. I gripped him tight, slowly moving my hand up and down his long, thick shaft, jerking him off through his pants.

“We can do anything you want, when you want it,” I said softly. “You just can't be afraid.”

Seeing the mixture of fear and lust in his eyes, I let go of his cock and stepped back. I saw something akin to regret in his eyes as I moved away, picking up his glass of water and drinking from it. I watched him over the rim of the glass carefully, waiting for – something. But he didn't say a word, nor did he move. He just stood there, pressed against the wall, staring at me with a look of pure need on his face.

“You're a divorcee,” I said. “I'm a horny twenty-three-year-old woman. Who says we can't have a little fun together? Where is that written into law?”

And with that, I left him there in the kitchen alone with his thoughts and his throbbing cock, the memory of my words as well as my hand on him in his mind. As much as I wanted to fuck his brains out right then and there, I knew that leaving him like that would only make him yearn for me more. He'd go back to his lonely bed, my words implanted into his mind, and think of all the dirty things he wanted to do with me. Hell, he'd probably even jerk himself off while he thought about it – a thought that turned me on more than I could say.

We'd get there, sooner or later. Hopefully sooner, of course, but the slow build-up of desire between us would make our first time even hotter. More intense. More gratifying.

If nothing else, it gave me something to look forward to – and plenty of fodder to masturbate to as well.



Chapter Four

JULIAN