He’s been so good through all of this. I never imagined I’d have someone who could keep me as centered and as grounded as he can, but it’s exactly what I need. He calms me when I’m stressed and makes me feel like everything is going to be okay in the future. Even when the future seems terrifying, he’s there for me.
I don’t know a damn thing about having a baby. I don’t know how to raise one. I’ve never even held one. But Gavin bought all the books and even read them, and I know he’s going to be a good father. He’s changed over the last month, in subtle ways, but they’re noticeable. He doesn’t go out with his friends as often and he doesn’t drink as much. He works out even more and seems very intent on the future. He’s stressed with work, of course, since my father is trying to destroy him, but he’s still there for me.
And he wants me to fight. I have to admit that it’s tempting. I don’t want my family’s money. I don’t want a single freaking dime from them at all. But I don’t want to make this easy on them either. I want it to be difficult to kick me out of the family, because it should be. It shouldn’t be easy to send me away and to forget about me.
I was their daughter for so long. And maybe I made some mistakes, at least in their eyes, but I’m still their daughter no matter what. Of course, they don’t see me that way, and they never did. It’s hard to accept that, really and truly accept it, even though I know it’s the truth.
That’s what I’m here for today, though. I’m going to accept my place in the world. I’m going to accept that my family doesn’t want me and that I’m making a new family with Gavin, one where I’m going to be much happier.
“Ready?” Gavin asks when the elevator reaches the top floor.
“Ready,” I say, feeling anything but.
We step out and head down the hall. Like before, I knock on the door, feeling awkward. But instead of Thomas opening up, Peter stands there.
I look back at him, surprised. He looks like the same old Peter, but instead of his usually sly smile for me, he stares blankly.
“You’re right on time,” he says.
“Hi, Peter,” I respond. “It’s good to see you.”
He nods. “Father’s in his study.”
I glance back at Gavin as we follow Peter into the apartment. Of everything that has happened, the way Peter’s acting toward me right now hurts the most. We follow him down the hall and he doesn’t look at me again, like I’m some stranger visiting instead of the sister he’s been so close with for so long.
“Hold on,” I say to Gavin. “Can you wait here?”
He pauses. “Sure,” he says.
I turn to Peter, who looks a little surprised. “Can I talk to you?” I ask him.
He hesitates, then nods. “Yeah. Sure.”
I lead him into the dining room and shut the door behind us. I turn to him and for a second, I think that I see the brother I once loved so much.
“I’ve missed you,” I say to him. “I’m sorry things are so weird right now.”
He glances away. “Why’d you do it?”
“Do what?”
“Get pregnant. By that… person.”
I frown and shake my head. “I didn’t meant to get pregnant. And I like Gavin… I like him a lot. He makes me happy.”
“Still.” Peter looks back at me and I think he might be pleading with me. “The family comes over everything. You know that.”
“They were going to marry me off to Milo,” I say softly. “Doesn’t what I want count at all?”
“No,” Peter says firmly. “It doesn’t count for any of us. You know that. And you’re still turning your back on us.”
“I’m not,” I say. “I’m not turning my back at all. Father is forcing me to leave.”
“If you got rid of that… thing, you could stay.”
I stare at him, shocked. How could Peter, my loving brother, say something like that to me?
“It’s my baby,” I say flatly.
“It’s a mistake.” He stares at me again with that blank expression. “Come on. Father’s waiting.”
Peter opens the doors and steps back out into the hall. I watch him for a second then follow, biting back my tears.
I won’t freaking cry. I won’t give them the satisfaction.
But that moment back there, that was the end. He was my last hope. Part of me hoped that Peter was still somehow on my side, despite everything, and that he’d make it all okay. He used to do that all the time when I fought with Michael, back when we were kids.
We’re not kids anymore. And Peter isn’t my brother.