Her eyes are getting glossy, and she’s swallowing away the tears. Just looking at her makes me feel sick to my stomach. I’ve been blind to the truth. She’s into me, but I can’t offer her the same love in return.
Not like that.
“But … I’m not,” I stammer.
“I know …” she says, nodding, biting her lip. “I just wanted to let you know.”
I look down at the sheets, unable to think of what to say.
“I don’t think I can stay here any longer,” she says.
My eyes jolt up to her again. “What?”
“I can’t do this anymore, Autumn. I can’t watch you with Hunter, knowing what I’m missing. Knowing what I can never have. It’s turning me into a person I don’t want to be.”
“So you’re leaving?” Now tears are forming in my eyes, too.
“Scarlet offered me her room for a couple of weeks. Her roommate left, so … At least I can crash somewhere.” Evie stands up and packs some stuff into her suitcase.
So it’s really true. She’s leaving because of me. Because she has feelings for me I can’t give her in return.
“But you barely know her,” I stammer.
“I think I can manage,” she says, zipping her suitcase shut. “I like you, Autumn. Too much. I need to be alone for a little while, so I can overcome that. Maybe stop thinking about you every second of the day.”
I smile, feeling embarrassed by the idea that she thinks of me the way I think of Hunter.
Damn, this is complicated.
“Well … bye,” she says, and she gives me a gentle peck on my forehead.
A tear runs down her face as she grabs her suitcase and stumbles out the door, glancing at me one final time before leaving.
Chapter 16
Hunters gonna be Hunters
I can’t close my eyes tonight. The tears just keep coming, making my entire face wet. Eventually I just give up and started reading instead. Not that it proves much of a distraction. Evie and her confession play over and over in my mind, and I keep thinking about what I should’ve done differently.
It’s too late to change it now.
Getting out of bed is hard, but I manage. I don’t want to lie down if I can’t sleep anyway. Better do some homework instead.
It’s dark outside, and when I look at Evie’s bed the emptiness makes me feel hollow inside. I feel like I just lost my best friend, which is absurd. She’s only a few dorm rooms away. Still, I’m feeling blue today.
Just as I’m about to sit down at my desk, someone knocks on my door.
I open it and am baffled. Jaret is standing there in a fine suit with a glittery hat on.
“Wow,” I say, squeezing my eyes shut because of all the shimmers. “Going somewhere?”
He chuckles. “It’s the hat, right? I thought it looked cool.”
“I’m jealous,” I jest. “So, what’s up?”
“Well, there’s this party going on at a secret location, and I wondered if you’d like to come?”
“What? Me?” I say. “Secret parties?”
“Hunter’s there, too. I’m surprised he didn’t bring you. Maybe he forgot. Anyway, since you’re his girlfriend, I figured you’d want to come.”
“I’m not his …” I’ve already stopped talking before the entire sentence comes out. I’m not his girlfriend, I think. Just the thought makes me blush like crazy. But maybe if he believes I’m Hunter’s girlfriend, I can get inside and figure out what he’s doing at that party.
“Sure, I’d love to come,” I say with a big, fake smile.
Maybe this will be a good thing. Sitting here and thinking about Evie all night long clearly isn’t doing me any good.
“Cool. Thought you could use the distraction, seeing all that homework.” He glances at the stack of books on my desk.
“Thanks,” I say. “It’s nice of you to ask me.”
He smiles proudly. “No problem. So, you ready to go like this or do you want to put something else on instead? I recommend short skirts, especially if you want to be let inside,” he says with a wink.
Squinting, I say, “Yeah, okay. Hold on a sec. I’ll go get dressed.”
“I’ll wait here.”
I close the door behind me and immediately rummage through my closet, looking for the perfect outfit. I’m not good at this at all. The last time I went to a party was in the third grade, and it was a sleepover. I don’t know if you could even call that a ‘party.’ I have no idea what to wear, so I just grab the sexiest clothes I have, which is a short black dress and heels to match.
After fixing my hair, putting on some mascara, and putting on some earrings I open the door.