Fierce(29)
Fuck, he’s right. I really am attracted to him.
I don’t want to be, though.
Shit. I’m seriously glowing for a guy that breaks all the rules, ignores everything that he’s told, and goes against everything I was ever taught. He’s the epitome of a bad boy; a cocky, confident fighter, who likes to get girls worked up for no reason.
Especially girls like me.
Goddammit, he knows. He knows what he does to me. And still he continues.
“Stop being such a jerk!”
He chuckles. “Me? A jerk? Never.”
In a fit, I pick up a pillow lying on my bed and throw it at his face, but he catches it in time. He’s still laughing, and it’s making me even more pissed. “Stop laughing!”
“I can’t. You’re too funny when you’re mad at me.”
“Goddammit, I hate that.”
“Hate what? I just came here to talk to you.”
“I hate it that you come in here and … and …”
“And what? That I show you the truth about yourself? That you secretly enjoy breaking the rules and don’t want to admit it?”
My breath falters, and I close my mouth. I don’t know what to say. Part of me wants to shout and tell him to leave. Another part wants to tell him he’s right, and that I’m so goddamn into him I can’t stand it.
He throws the pillow aside. “Stop being such a snoot and open your eyes. You saw what happened yesterday. That’s the real world. You can’t hide behind your innocence forever.”
The more he says, the more I want to forget about everything.
“You can’t shut it out. You have to deal with what happened. Face it head on. It’s the only way to stop it from happening again.”
“And you think I can face it head on?” I say, crossing my arms, feeling very vulnerable all of a sudden. “How can you say that? You make it sound so easy. Like I should just get over it. I was almost raped last night!” I scream.
It’s the first time the world rolls over my lips. Tears well up in my eyes.
He steps closer again, and I draw back into my shell as usual. It’s the only way I know how to deal with things. I’m the girl who runs away. Who doesn’t even defend herself when she’s teased. The girl who hopes things will just go away as long as she ignores them. I’m not a fighter.
He is.
Hunter puts his hands on my arms, and suddenly they’re not that tough anymore. He’s gentle, and he tugs me closer until I give in.
He pulls me in for a hug. My face presses against his broad chest as I wheeze. Anxiety. This is how my body responds to all the fear and pain that was suppressed after last night. Now it’s all spilling out.
I’m crying, my tears making his shirt wet, and he’s petting my hair. Shushing me, he caresses the top of my head until I calm down.
“Shit …” I say.
“What?”
“I didn’t want to cry.”
He muffles a laugh. “Sometimes you have to.”
“Do you?”
He sniffs. “When things happen, yes. You’ve seen it.”
Somehow his confession makes this better. It makes me remember that everybody has moments of weakness.
We’re quiet for some time. I’m not sure if it’s because of our awkward conversation or because he’s holding me. Either way, it feels good, and I don’t want him to let me go.
I never knew a guy’s arms could be so comforting.
“I could help you, you know,” he says softly.
“With what?” I say, drying my tears with my hands.
I look up into his face, and he cocks his eyebrows. “Teach you some moves.”
I frown. “What … you mean …” The thought alone makes me laugh. “You want me to learn how to fight?”
He grabs my arms and pushes me forward. His grip is harsh and it forces me back into the moment. “Do you want to stop those assholes from taking advantage of you again or not? I’m not always going to be there to save you,” he says.
I nod, still wiping the tears from my eyes.
“At least … not unless you want me to.” He wriggles his eyebrows, and it makes me blush. For a moment I forget all about the fact that I was just bawling my eyes out.
“Anyway, I know just how,” he says. The left side of his lips curls up into a sly smile. “But it’ll cost you something.” His eyes move down my shirt, and he licks his lips in the process.
Oh my God. Is he checking me out?
My panties are already getting wet just from seeing his eyes skim over me like I’m worth looking at. As if I’m sexy.
But then I realize what he just said.
“I’m not some kind of―”
“Bookworm?”