The next day, I drove back to the town and bought it for him. I have no idea if he'll like it. I also got a him a mini model of a Stirling engine, though I’m having second doubts about that one, too. Rich people are so hard to shop for.
Ugh, so much for getting any writing today. I'll start tomorrow for sure.
"Go ahead, just get it all out."
"How could you have told me? When did it start? Did it hurt? I can't believe you did it before me! Where did you do it?"
I have to pause to take a breath. Lauren just stares at me wearily. I doubt she'll answer most of my burning questions, but I so needed to get them out of my system. I've been repressing them so far, not wanting to add to her stress.
There are dark circles under Lauren's eyes. She hasn't puked yet, but she looks exhausted.
"I told you, I'll tell you everything after I talk to the father. Sorry, V. It's such a mess."
All I can do is nod sympathetically. Anyone can see the embarrassment on Lauren's face to be sitting in the waiting room of a women's clinic, waiting to have her pregnancy confirmed on paper so she can apply for government assistance. Her pride almost wouldn't let her, and I had to remind her it was for the baby.
"It did hurt," she says out of the blue. "In the beginning. But then, it didn't. It was...I thought I would regret it after the first time, but then I felt—I don't know—I wanted to do it again."
I'm speechless for a moment. This is Lauren. She doesn’t even like it when people brush against her in the hall. Did she turn into a nympho before my eyes?
"Do you love him?" I blurt out.
Lauren appears startled, as if she's never considered the question before. "I don't know," she admits softly, staring down at her hands in her lap. "It's weird to say, but I think it might depend on his reaction."
I scowl, remembering Damon's cowardly cringe. "He'd better act right. Or, I don't care what you say. I'll stomp him. I'll go all Fat Violet on his ass."
That makes her snicker a little. "Thanks, V."
"I'm serious, Lauren." I look her in the eye. "He'd better treat you right."
She just shrugs and shifts uncomfortably in the hard plastic chair.
We are quiet for a while. Someone named Sidney is called back and a scared-looking girl who couldn't have been much older than the twins, stands up with a scowling woman. The pair make their way grimly into the back room.
"Violet?" Lauren says suddenly, diverting my attention.
"Yeah?"
"Have you ever talked to Zane about...well, you said he's been with a lot of people...?"
I grimace at the reminder, but I know what she's getting at. "He gets tested regularly, and he always wears a condom. We talked about that before, when he asked if I was going to go on the pill."
"Are you going to?"
"I know I should, but—ugh—it's so embarrassing!"
Lauren looks around pointedly. "More embarrassing than this?"
"Good point."
Her name is called then. I try to go back with her, but she tells me I'm not going to watch her go pee. So I sit back down, left with my thoughts.
I want to be thinking about Lauren and her predicament, but my mind keeps turning back to Zane.
Should we wait to have sex? There were so many times we were so close, only to be cruelly thwarted. Is that a sign that I'm not ready yet?
Physically, I am so there. Really, just thinking about Zane, looking into those amazing dark eyes...I would do anything he asked.
And maybe that's the problem.
Ugh, why does it have to be so complicated? It's just sex, right? Lots of people do it, and it’s fine.
Right.
Chapter 26
Saturday morning.
It's just a few hours into my work day when Henry, who is six about 6'5" and two-eighty, slips coming out of the shower and falls right on top of me.
I am squashed. I just barely manage to reach my walkie talkie and call for help. Meanwhile, Henry is trying to get up, using my neck as leverage. I bet even Helize could hear my screams from her room.
"I'm fine," I tell Amy, the nurse for the third time.
She's holding my arm, moving it gently. I wince a little when she rotates it to the left.
"I still want you to take the weekend off," she says. "Get some rest, take hot showers. I don't think you'll have any bruising."
I shake my head. "Honestly, I'm okay. I can even finish the rest of my shift."
"Jody's already on her way, and she asked if we need her for tomorrow. She's dying for more hours, what with Christmas being around the corner." Amy smiles and pats my shoulder. "Besides, you've been looking exhausted lately. Just take it easy."
"Okay," I say reluctantly. "Should I fill out an incident report before I go?"