if he wanted her to be happy here until they could be together again, she had to let go of
who she'd been at Sword & Cross.
She turned around to face Shelby. "Get the bottle."
47
FOUR
FIFTEEN DAYS
She wasn't that blond.
Luce wet her hands in the sink and tugged her short bleached waves. She'd made
it through a full load of classes on Thursday, which included an unexpectedly stiff twohour safety lecture from Francesca to reiterate why the Announcers were not to be
messed with casually (it almost seemed like she'd been addressing Luce directly); backto-back pop quizzes in her "regular" biology and math classes in the main school
building; and what felt like eight straight hours of aghast stares from her classmates,
Nephilim and non-Neph kids alike.
Even though Shelby had acted cool about Luce's new look in the privacy of their
dorm room the night before, she wasn't effusive with compliments the way Arriane was
or reliably supportive the way Penn had been. Stepping out into the world this morning,
Luce had been overcome by nerves. Miles had been the first to see her, and he'd given her
a thumbs-up. But he was so nice, he'd never let on if he really thought she looked terrible.
Of course, Dawn and Jasmine had flocked to her side right after humanities, eager
to touch her hair, asking Luce who her inspiration had been.
"Very Gwen Stefani," Jasmine had said, nodding.
"No, it's Madge, right?" Dawn said. "Like, 'Vogue' era." Before Luce could
answer, Dawn gestured between Luce and herself. "But I guess we aren't Twinkies
anymore."
"Twinkies?" Luce shook her head.
Jasmine squinted at Luce. "Come on, don't say you never noticed? You two
look ... well, looked so much alike. You practically could have been sisters."
Now, standing alone before the main school building's bathroom mirror, Luce
gazed at her reflection and thought about wide-eyed Dawn. They had similar coloring:
pale skin, flushed lips, dark hair. But Dawn was smaller than she was. She wore bright
colors six days a week. And she was way more chipper than Luce could ever be. A few
superficial aspects aside, Luce and Dawn couldn't have been more different.
The bathroom door swung open and a wholesome-looking brunette in jeans and a
yellow sweater entered. Luce recognized her from European history class. Amy
Something. She leaned against the sink next to Luce and began to fidget with her
eyebrows.
"Why'd you do that to your hair?" she asked, eyeing Luce.
Luce blinked. It was one thing to talk about it with her sort-of friends at
Shoreline, but she'd never even spoken to this girl before.
Shelby's answer, fresh start, popped into her mind, but who was she kidding? All
that bottle of peroxide had done last night was make Luce look as phony on the outside as
48
she already felt on the inside. Callie and her parents would hardly recognize her right
now, which wasn't the point at all.
And Daniel. What would Daniel think? Luce suddenly felt so transparently fake;
even a stranger could see through her.
"I don't know." She pushed past the girl and out the bathroom door. "I don't know
why I did it."
Bleaching her hair wouldn't wash away the dark memories of the past few weeks.
If she really wanted a fresh start, she'd have to make one. But how? There was so little
she actually had control over at the moment. Her whole world was in the hands of Mr.
Cole and Daniel. And they were both far away.
It was scary how quickly and how much she'd come to rely on Daniel, scarier still
that she didn't know when she'd see him next. Compared to the bliss-filled days with him
she'd been expecting in California, this was the loneliest she'd ever been.
She trudged across the campus, slowly realizing that the only time she'd felt any
independence since she'd arrived at Shoreline had been ...
Alone in the woods with the shadow.
After yesterday's in-class demonstration, Luce had been expecting more of the
same from Francesca and Steven. She had hoped that maybe the students would have a
chance to experiment with the shadows on their own today. She'd even had the briefest
fantasy of being able to do what she'd done in the forest in front of all the Nephilim.
None of that had happened. In fact, class today had felt like a big step back. A
boring lecture about Announcer etiquette and safety, and why the students should never,
under any circumstances, try on their own what they'd seen the day before.
It was frustrating and regressive. So now, instead of heading back to the dorm,
Luce found herself jogging behind the mess hall, down the trail to the edge of the bluff,
and up the wooden stairs of the Nephilim lodge. Francesca's office was in the annex on
the second floor, and she'd told the class to feel free to come by anytime.