Her eyebrows shot up. “If Nixon see’s you, he’s going to threaten you again.”
“Let me handle Nixon.” All teasing had left my voice.
The smile fell from Trace’s face. “Are you okay?”
No. I wasn’t okay. I was in pain. My heart cracked against my chest, hurting like hell. “I’m always okay,” I lied.
“Chase…” Trace reached out and cupped my cheek.
Her fingers scalded me — changed me from the inside out.
“…is it getting too hard for you? To be my personal bodyguard? Nixon said something about—”
Her voice died off.
“What did the boss say?” I wrapped my arm around her and forced a smile.
“That you…” She shook her head. “You know what? Never mind. We’re friends, right?”
“The best of…” Another lie.
“Good.” She let out a sigh. “Promise me something?”
“Anything.”
“Don’t ever leave without saying goodbye.”
“Who says I’m leaving?” I stopped walking again and pulled her closer to me.
“It’s just…” Her eyes focused on the ground as she shrugged. “I’m not sure. I just get this weird feeling when I’m around you, like you’re five seconds away from losing it or just… leaving.”
I loved her.
I loved her.
I loved her.
I wondered how long I could hold it back before I ruined everything — before she was finally able to put the pieces of my giant-ass puzzle together.
“I’m not a jackass, Trace. I would never leave you defenseless, let alone without saying goodbye.”
She exhaled. “Good.”
“So what are you and Nixon gonna do?”
“It’s a surprise.” Her face lit up. “But I have a sneaking suspicion it has to do with self-defense, especially after the whole fiasco last week.”
The fiasco, meaning her grandfather going into hiding and she having to move into Nixon’s house of horrors.
“Ah, I see.” Because, I really did.
“Anyway, it will be good to have some time alone.”
“Yeah.” I sighed.
Trace twirled a piece of hair around her finger, and that’s when the second part of the moment happened, where I let my imagination run rampant with hope.
I spent more time with her than he did.
I loved her more. She just didn’t know it.
I could protect her.
I could save her.
And in return — she’d save me.
Right? Isn’t that how love worked?
She bit down on her bottom lip as she looked up at the dorm and put her hands on her hips.
I wondered if Nixon knew that was the stance she took when she was feeling lazy and not wanting to go up the stairs.
I wondered if he knew that every time she nibbled her lower lip it meant she was thinking.
I wondered if he was aware that Trace hated chipmunks but loved squirrels, or that she thought the color yellow was irritating, or that rain made her happy.
These were the things I knew — I knew them by heart just like I knew her scent, her favorite things. And I hated that, even though he knew less, he owned her in a way I probably never would.
“Well, I better go change.” Trace interrupted my thoughts. “Thanks, Chase.”
The slow-motion thing happened again — the moment I didn’t pull back as she stood on her tiptoes and placed a kiss on my cheek.
A half inch. And our lips would have been touching.
I closed my eyes as her mouth lingered on my hot skin.
When she pulled back, I almost cursed Nixon to hell and pushed her up against the brick wall.
Instead, I let the moment pass.
The second moment.
The second moment in my time with Trace that I should have done something different.
As I walked away I realized that was all I’d been doing with her, walking in the opposite direction.
But things were about to change.
Because next time. I’d take full advantage, and Nixon would just have to fight. I’d make him fight, because I was tired of allowing him to win on default.
No more moments would pass — I wouldn’t let them.
If he wanted her, he was going to have to prove he loved her more than life itself — because I already knew I did.