Enforce(106)

I reached for her hand, but she jerked it away.

“You do, though, Trace. You belong here just as much as anybody else and—”

“No.” She shook her head. “I don’t. I can’t tell them who I am, and even if I did, what would happen? I’d earn respect because of my family, but it would all be fake. Meanwhile, you’d come up with another excuse to break my heart into a million pieces, saying you had no choice. Go to hell, Nixon. Actually…” She laughed. “…don’t. Because I’ve been living there for the past three weeks. Just stay away from me.”

She grabbed her books and charged out of class. I pressed my hands against my forehead. I’d lost her. I’d lost her, and for what? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

I loved her.

And she was walking away.

Just like I’d told her to do.

Just like I’d done.





CHAPTER FIFTY

Broken



Phoenix

MY DAD HAD OFFICIALLY disowned me.

He’d told me to my face, slapped me, then laughed as the rest of the associates had watched — and done nothing.

I was humiliated.

And the worst part. I’d probably deserved it, because I’d said no to him. I’d finally stood up for myself, and he’d damn-near killed me for it.

He’d asked me to take another virgin.

Another one he’d been putting on the market for one of his special clients. I’d declined, telling him to go to hell.

Instead, he’d put me there.

I had no money.

No home.

No friends.

No family.

I was better off dead.

Just as I was about to go put a gun on my mouth and pull the trigger — because really what was the point anymore? — Trace had barreled out of a classroom and whispered under her breath.

“Grandma, I wish you were here.”

“Grandma?” I repeated. My voice unrecognizable— Who the hell was that talking? It was like I was present but not in control of my own actions— No, rage had long ago taken over; the monster inside had broken free.

Because I’d fed it.

Over and over again.

With sex.

With darkness.

With killing.

I’d fed it, and now it was hungry, angry, and needing more food. She was the reason I had nothing. She was the reason I was going to kill myself. And she deserved to be shamed, just like I felt shame.

Her eyes were afraid.

Something else snapped, maybe it was my conscience, because in that moment I didn’t see her as a person but an object that needed to be destroyed, a problem that only I could fix.

“Grandma?” I repeated. “Would that be Grandma Alfero?”

She laughed and tried to walk past me. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She started texting, dismissing me as if I was nothing. Confirming my suspicions all along.

I was nothing.

A waste of air.

A waste of freaking humanity.

Just like my father said.

“Where do you think you’re going?” I moved to stand in front of her.

She turned around and started walking in the other direction, but I jogged in front of her. My arms shot out to brace her shoulders. My fingers dug into her shoulders as I slammed her into the wall.

My enemy.

Who should have been my friend.

What the hell was I doing?

My body screamed for vengeance.

My mind was a jumbled mess of insults and darkness, and then her face became like every other face I’d screwed. Every girl I’d taken from…

Was found in her innocence.

I moved forward. Maybe if I kissed her, maybe she would fix it, make it better, suck the darkness from my soul. “Talk.” I brushed my lips against hers.

She pushed against me.

Unwanted by her.

Of course. Because I wasn’t him.

“Or not.” I grinned, though I wasn’t happy, just really, really sad and confused. “We could always do some other things. Word around the school is that you’re used goods. Once I’m done with you, you’ll forget all about Nixon and be screaming my name instead.”

She kicked me, and I snapped, dragging her down the hall with me. She started screaming for help, but I knew nobody would help her.

“She likes it rough.” I laughed.

People joined in.

I was living my own nightmare.

This wasn’t me.

But I kept pulling her.

I kept choosing to let the anger control me, pound through my soul. Maybe I’d just kill her and shoot myself next.

Maybe I’d take from him like he’d stolen from me.

“No, No! Please! Please help me!” Her voice was frantic.

I ignored her plea and continued pulling her toward our campus hangout.

“Stop! Phoenix! STOP!”

She dug her heels into the ground, but it only made me laugh harder as I threw her over my shoulder.

“That’s more like it,” I said gruffly. “You think you’re so perfect just because of who your family is? Do you even know who I am?” I jerked her head close to my mouth and yelled it into her ear. “And all because of you I’ve lost the chance to be with Nixon’s family! My connections? Gone. My money? GONE! Wanna know why?”