“Wait. I don’t get it. Lettie said—”
“Lettie doesn’t know shit. She only knows what I want her and everyone else to think. The truth is something entirely different.”
Pushing out a nervous huff of laughter, I tugged on the hem of my t-shirt, stretching it over my knees. Participating in a soul-searching session wasn’t at the top of my to-do list right now. Mostly because I didn’t have the bandwidth mentally or physically. Powerlessness and vulnerability had settled deep in my bones, and I was still freefalling from the fight with my dad.
“Everyone has a private and a public agenda. You’re no different from any of the other guys working for my dad. I’d bet ninety percent of them are in it for the power and money rather than the experience of being part of the family.”
“Can I trust you?” Before I could respond, he swung his legs onto my bed, cozying up beside me. “I already know you’re going to tell me I can, but you’re wasting your breath. I know you can’t make that promise, not with your dad being who he is. Information is a valuable currency in this world, and you could decide to sell me out to get what you want.”
I caught his gaze, trying to convey sincerity. “I wouldn’t do that.”
“I know you wouldn’t want to do that, but if it came to a choice between you and me, you’d pick yourself every time. I’m not saying you’re selfish because you’re not. You’re desperate. Maybe you’re more desperate than me, and that’s saying a lot, or maybe it’s because my wounds aren’t as fresh as yours.”
I squinted, puzzling out his cryptic words. “What do you mean?”
“Do you know how Pietro took in my family after my dad died?”
I nodded.
“Well, my mom didn’t want to accept his help. I convinced her to move in there, and you know why?”
Not sure I wanted to know, my stomach twisted and turned into tiny knots. “I suppose you needed money.”
“Yeah, there was that. Mostly, though, I wanted to find out who killed my dad.”
“I heard he was mugged or something.”
“That’s the official story. I don’t believe it.”
I frowned. “You don’t?”
“No. My dad and Pietro had been butting heads for months. A week before he died, Pietro dropped by our house in the middle of the night. I knew I should’ve stayed in bed. My dad didn’t want me to get sucked into the Family business. He wanted me to go to college as far away from New York as possible and never come back.” He paused, his eyes distant like he was reliving something from his past. “Anyway, they were fighting about missing money. My dad threatened to go to Dominick and Angelo if Pietro didn’t come clean. He gave him one month to get his shit in order, and my dad was dead a week later. Pietro framed my dad, claiming he stole the money.”
My veins iced over. I knew Pietro had something to do with his death. While Lettie had only told me bits and pieces of what went on in her house, it was enough to know that putting a hit on Sal’s dad for threatening to rat him out wasn’t out of the realm of possibility.
“Holy shit,” I wheezed.
“I did the only thing I could think of at the time.”
“What’s that?”
His eyes latched onto mine again, and for a second he didn’t answer. “I ingratiated myself with Pietro, hoping I could prove he killed my dad and took the money.”
“Have you found anything?”
“No. Nothing concrete, and I think that’s by design. The minute I became a soldier, Dominick assigned me to Angelo rather than Pietro, though I still check in with Pietro here and there and offer to do things for him. That’s how we ended up at the warehouse the day we were ambushed.”
My breath stalled inside my lungs. “Do you think he had something to do with what happened?”
“I know he did. I just can’t prove it yet.” He squeezed my leg. “So that’s my story. I don’t give a shit about the mafia. I wish I were doing anything but being drawn deeper into this world. This life. I had this idea I could get in, vindicate my dad, and get out. Sadly, it doesn’t work that way. The only way out of the family is death or jail.”
“Or the witness protection program,” I joked even though it was a real possibility.
“Nah. I’d never do that because as much as I hate Pietro, I love and respect the others. Angelo, Gian, Tony, and even your father in some twisted way because without him, I wouldn’t be here with you. You’re my reward for all the bad shit even if we can never be more than this, and I’d make the same choices again it if brought me to you. ”