“I’ve heard that rumor too. That the island is “spooky”. But I don’t believe in things like that. Also, I’ve been to Hawaii. It’s beautiful. And I love camping in the most beautiful places. But I want somewhere really remote. I want a place that no one goes to. Somewhere really out of the way. A place that is like a secret. A place that I can make my secret.”
It was painful to look at her. She was on fire. She literally took his breath away. He had to have her before he lost her. He took her small, cold hands in his, and leaned forward to kiss her.
Elizabeth immediately pulled away from him. “I’m sorry. I really am. I know it’s cliché, but it’s not you it’s me. I don’t know how to do this. I’m heartless. I should have never been born a woman. I’m not soft and tender. I’m hard and firm. And I’m too cold to know how to be with a man.”
“Are you a lesbian?” Arthur asked suspiciously.
“No,” Elizabeth laughed. “I guess I’m not soft or tender enough to be with anyone. I think that’s what I’m getting at. I’m really sorry if I led you on.” Elizabeth looked down for a moment with a look of consternation on her face. “You know, I’ve never really loved anyone. Not even Austin. And he certainly never loved me. I don’t blame him. Can you imagine being only nineteen years old and you’re suddenly saddled with raising your little sister. And not only that, both his parents and his grandfather were dead. I can’t imagine the resentment he must have felt. But it’s okay, because I’m just as cold as he is. I don’t know what that means to get emotional about another person or to show affection. I don’t think I’m capable of having a romantic relationship with another person. I’m too independent for that. Can we just be friends?”
Arthur felt sorry for her. He had been fascinated by her quiet reserve ever since he had first met her. And her self-confidence had earned his admiration. Her harsh candor had aroused in him feelings of bitterness. But her inability to connect with other people in any way that was profoundly soulful aroused his pity. What a pathetic existence, he thought to himself. To go through life without love for any other person sounded like a curse that he could not bear. Though she related her inability to love with her fierce independence, he knew obstinate self-reliance had nothing to do with it. There was something else, just underneath the surface, something so very strong and yet well-disguised by her own relentless rationalizations that kept her from love. Though Arthur wondered what it was that kept her from forming loving attachments to other people, he knew that she couldn’t give enough of herself to him to ever let him know the answer to that. And yet he still craved her. The possibility of danger on her trip had pushed his desire to connect with her to this moment in the garden. And he now knew what he had to do.
“I’d like to be friends, Liz,” he said cordially.
She stuck out her hand and vigorously shook his. For someone with such small hands, he noted that she had quite a firm handshake on her.
“I’d like that,” she told him with more than an ounce of sincerity. She was always honest. "I know a lot of people. I’ve collected acquaintances galore. But I only have a few friends! Austin and I are travelling half the year if not more. We’re always hiking or camping somewhere. And when we aren’t travelling, we are making arrangements to travel. We don’t get much time for long, lasting relationships.”
Arthur wanted to grab her right then and there. But, instead, he just took her hands in his and gave them an encouraging squeeze. If she sensed the sexual tension he was experiencing then she didn’t let on. She looked completely oblivious to any possibility other than the possibility of them mutually deciding on a friendship and both having instantly moved on from the notion of romance. She took people at their word. Honesty was a quality she had been born with and she expected this from others even when it is often better to be suspicious.
Suddenly, their quiet time was interrupted by a low, male voice singing karaoke. It was a smooth, silky baritone that was coming from inside the house. An old classic was slowly flowing from his lips. He crooned, “Something happens and I’m head over heels/I never find out till I’m head over heels/Something happens and I’m head over heels/ Ah, don’t take my heart/Don’t break my heart/Don’t throw it away.”
Elizabeth listened with wide eyes that had suddenly lit up like fireworks. She leaned towards the back door and perked up her ears. Arthur was surprised. He had never seen her so interested in another person in his life. He also liked the soothing, yet powerful, voice that emanated from the karaoke crooner, but it wasn’t in the same way that Elizabeth obviously admired it. Arthur only entertained it as a pleasant curiosity. He wondered about the singer. That voice had a strange lilt that he had never heard before. The words seemed to roll into each other. It added an even more melodious quality to the tune he sang. And then the voice faded away as the song came to a close.