“Can I sit here?” Carson asked while pointing to the chaise.
“Yes, of course. I’m being rude. Come in and make yourself comfortable. Would you like a bottle of water? I don’t have anything stronger back here.” She moved around the small dressing room, unsure of where or how to settle.
Carson fixed his calm gaze on her. “You don’t have to entertain me, you’re working. I just wanted to come back and say hi. You were great tonight, better than great. I don’t know how to explain what watching you does to me.”
She somewhat relaxed, stilled her movement, settled on the small stool at her vanity, bracing herself against what she had to say. “It’s what I do for a living, but I’m afraid you have that part of me mixed up with who I am. Actually, forget that, because outside this club, I don’t know who or what I am either. I’m always working. I guess you could say I’m a workaholic, so when it comes to living life, I’m inexperienced.”
Sienna wasn’t sure where this was coming from, but she was going with it. She needed some way to explain her naïveté when it came to relationships. She didn’t want to look foolish when it came to men, although she was incredibly so.
“Fuck,” Carson said, rubbing his hands back through his hair and down his neck, then leaning his head back into the cradle his hands made. “I didn’t mean to minimize you and make you think I was just after you for your stripping, I mean, dancing. Shit, I’m screwing this up and now I’m swearing and stumbling over myself.”
“It’s okay. I get it. I’m as unnerved as you.” She looked down at her bare feet.
Still keeping distance between the two of them, Sienna remained seated at her vanity table while Carson sat somewhat uncomfortably on her purple velour chaise, obviously searching for something to say.
“I admit I was initially smitten with ‘Sienna,’ the adult dancer. But now after coffee and lunch, I like you even more. Sienna in a ball cap, without makeup, dressed for the grocery store. That Sienna. The real version.”
Who is the real Sienna?
“I’m sure it’s hard to separate the two,” she said. “Sienna from the stage and this Sienna sitting here in front of you, because it’s hard to distinguish the two, even for me. I don’t have a ton of practice.”
Carson nodded. “I get it. It’s like when I was in the FBI, and I tried so hard not to let the agency define me. Either way, I’m glad you let me come back. I wanted to hang out a little more with you since I’m leaving in the morning.” He let out a long breath and tried to fit his large body more comfortably on the suddenly fragile-looking chaise.
Sienna felt the thing, the one she couldn’t name or describe, tighten in her chest when he mentioned leaving, but there was no way she was going to address it. She only said “Thanks” for the millionth time. “Thanks for coming tonight, too. What are your plans back east?” she asked, trying to keep her disappointment from her tone, but failing.
The pair made small talk for a while, ignoring the obvious tension over their weekend coming to a close. Carson explained he’d be mostly working over the next few days, and would probably catch dinner with a friend one night.
Then he admitted to wanting to know something altogether different, forcing the conversation into a direction they had obviously been avoiding.
“I plan to be back to Vegas a lot in the next few weeks,” he said. “Can we see each other again?” He offered an overly hopeful grin.
“That would be fun, you have my number.” Realizing she was giving in to her heart, Sienna started to backpedal on her original excitement. “Actually, I’m going away for a night or two this week for some R&R, so next weekend will be jammed for me, making up for lost time and stuff. So can we play it by ear?”
Stop protecting yourself. You want to see him.
Carson frowned. “Not sure if I’ll be here next week or the week after, because I have to go back east for a day or so and straighten out my schedule. We’ll figure it out. I’ll make it all happen, even if you’re busy.”
“Okay,” she said in a hushed voice.
Shifting subjects, Carson asked, “So, what do you do now? Now that your dancing is over for the week?” He finally gave up on getting comfortable and leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees.
Sienna shrugged. “I go home, unwind, and get ready to enjoy my day off.”
“Can I walk you to your car?”
She winced and said, “I don’t drive myself here. I take a club town car to and from work. Asher insists.” Then she threw her hands in the air, feigning defeat.