Earl of Hearts(24)

Nicola pinched her lips together in a forced smile. Why did everyone so  easily believe she was with child? John must have whispered in the  woman's ear. That she had accepted his remark without question was a bit  unsettling.

After the tea and light repast had been delivered, Nicola turned to John  and cast him a smile. "Our own little corner of paradise."

He looked pained and uncomfortable. "I'll check on Valor while you bathe."

"No, John." She paled at the thought of his leaving her. "Don't go."

He regarded her, confused. "I'll only be at the stables. I won't be far,  nor will I stay there very long. I can't just …  I don't want to make you  feel uncomfortable while you undress."

She shook her head and gave a mirthless laugh. "Everyone believes we're  married and I'm carrying your child. We've slept together in Maeve's  bed."

"Fully clothed."

She nodded. "The point is, we've been together ever since we went on the  run, our bodies in constant contact, our hearts attuned to the beat of  each other's heart. You've killed to protect me." She sank onto the  settee and gazed into the fire. "John, my soul has been laid bare to  you. I have nothing to hide from you. Not now, not ever."

His groan sounded pained as he came to her side and knelt beside her.  "So be it," he said, his voice a husky rumble that sent tingles shooting  through her body. He reached out to slip the shawl off her shoulders,  his hands caressing her as he removed it.

Wordlessly, he nudged her to her feet and began to unlace the ties of  her woolen gown. She closed her eyes as more tingles shot through her  body when he began to lift the gown off her. His movements were slow and  sensual, his big hands sliding along her legs as he grasped the hem of  her gown to draw it up.         

     



 

Suddenly, he stilled. Releasing the fabric, he gave a soft curse and  took a step back. "Nicola, I have something important to tell you."

She opened her eyes, now curious to hear whatever it was he wanted to  confess. He began to pace in front of her. He looked uncertain and  pained. She'd never seen John look anything but sure of himself and in  full command of his feelings. "You can tell me anything. Surely, you  must know that by now."

He stopped pacing and returned to her side, his grip tightening on her  shoulders. He released a long, deep breath. "Nicola, we're married."

She laughed and shook her head. "I know that's the story we're telling  everyone. I'm also carrying your child. Never say you are starting to  believe the lies?"

"It isn't a lie. We're married."

She frowned at him. "Stop saying that."

"We're married," he insisted. "The ceremonial declaration I had you make  in front of Sammy and his family …  well, we're in Scotland now …  and what  I had you recite is the equivalent of a marriage vow. When I took your  hand in mine and recited those words, then had you do the same …  that was  a wedding ceremony. Our wedding. You're now my wife under Scottish law.  But there's a catch."

The blood drained from her face and she suddenly felt dizzy. Angry, too.  She'd wished to marry John. Her dreams had been filled with the magic  of this moment ever since she'd first met him. But to have it stolen  from her, taken from her like a thief in the night. To exchange vows  with the man she'd always loved and not realize this is what she was  doing? "What? Are you jesting?"

Theirs was a marriage of necessity. A marriage based on a lie.

"It's real. At least for the year. If we consummate-"

She gasped.

"If we consummate our vows, then we're married for life."

Her heart shot into her throat and lodged there painfully. She wanted to  speak, but had trouble finding her voice. "Are you saying that I've  trapped you into marriage?"

He gave an incredulous laugh. "You? I'm the one who trapped you. I've  robbed you of the courtship you deserve. I've stolen the innocence and  romance. But I want you to understand that I had no choice. Sammy was  going to claim you for one of his sons unless I proved to him that we  were wed."

"So you sacrificed yourself to protect me." She nodded. "And you're  hoping that we can quietly end this once we return to London. I  understand. I won't make it difficult for you."

Nor would she make matters worse by crying. She needed to be strong, to  deny that her breaths were short and that her heart was as shattered as  her dreams. So why was he scowling at her? "Nicola, you don't  understand."

"Yes. Yes, I do. You only married me to protect me because that's what  you always feel compelled to do. Once we're safely back in London and  Somersby is no longer a threat, you'll expect to have your freedom back.  I assure you, I won't give you a problem." Her brother might challenge  him to a duel. Pistols at dawn. But she would make Julian see reason.  After all, she'd brought this on herself. She was the one who'd allowed  Somersby to court her and then she'd stolen his secret book.

John had merely done what he needed to save her life.

"Damn it, Nicola. When you put it that way … "

"How else must it be stated? I don't see you on your knees, declaring  your undying love for me. What I see is a man trying to squirm out of a  noose. And I'm trying to assure you that I will never tighten that noose  around your neck. You'll have your precious freedom. I'll sign whatever  document will grant you that." She frowned at him. "So why are you  still staring at me with eyes blazing?"

Suddenly, it all felt too much.

She'd opened her heart to this man and all he could say was that their  marriage was a sham. All he could do was look at her with rage and  turmoil in his eyes.

Truly, what more did he want from her? The answer was so easy, all he  had to say was I want you, Nicola. I want you. That's all she needed to  hear from him. She wasn't asking for an I love you. But to admit even  the slightest need for her seemed overwhelming to him.

She stormed over to the tub and began to undress, no longer caring  whether he watched with eyes popping wide or yawned and turned away. He  could do-or not do-whatever he wished. "I will not interfere with your  hopes and dreams, John. What more do you want from me?"





CHAPTER 10




         

     



 
"NOTHING," JOHN SAID, his voice raw and strained, wanting to press his  lips to hers with a sweet, crushing urgency. "I want nothing from you.  Just wanted to be clear about our …  situation."

Nicola looked up at him, her eyes blazing. "You have been. Abundantly  clear. Don't let me delay you." She turned away, sat down on a stool  beside the tub, and began to roll the stockings off her legs. Long,  exquisitely shaped legs.

John saw that her hands were shaking. Yet, she'd never let on. That was  Nicola, too proud ever to admit she was hurt and vulnerable.

Her lips and chin were quivering.

He started toward her, wanting to take her into his arms. He loved how  perfectly she fit in them. But he held back, for he wasn't in control of  his feelings and was not certain where it might lead. "Nicola-"

"Go check on Valor." She refused to look at him. Instead, she stared at  her stockings with enough intensity to bore a hole in them. "I'll latch  the door after you've gone. Give me twenty minutes to bathe and then  I'll let you back in. Take a tart with you if you're hungry. Take all  the tarts you want. Make love to as many of them as your heart desires.  That's what men do, don't they? Have their fill and walk away?"

Obviously, they were no longer talking about pies. "Nicola-"

"Just go, John. You needn't say anything more to me. I'd like to get into the tub while the water's still warm."

He could have cleared up the misunderstanding with ease. One kiss. One  confession of love. Kissing her on Captain Grant's boat had been a  mistake. Kissing her again would change everything.

He had murderers to hunt down. He still sought vengeance for his family.

He wasn't ready for his life to change.

Not that he had doubts about Nicola. Any doubts were about himself. Could he give up his quest?

His thirst for revenge defined him. It's what had turned him into one of  the Crown's most effective agents. It's what had turned his heart to  stone.

He left their quarters, waited to hear Nicola latch the door after him,  and then took a quick walk around the inn. He scouted the common rooms  and then the grounds, taking in the best routes of escape should the  need arise. He walked to the stable and took note of several carriages  and horses other than this own.

"M'lord, ye needn't worry about yer horse," the young groom said. "I've fed 'im and groomed 'im."

The lad appeared to have a natural love of animals. John had seen it in  the way he'd handled Valor when they'd first arrived. "I have no doubt.  But I rode him a long way and thought I'd bring him a treat." He'd  picked up an apple that had fallen off one of the trees he'd passed  along the path and now handed it over. "Care to feed him?"