Ouyang Feng was inwardly alarmed, “This is not good! If those two leap onto the mast they will be unreachable for a while.” He flew out to block them.
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Both of Hong Qigong’s palms made a ferocious chopping motion creating a roaring gust of wind.
Ouyang Feng’s fist swept horizontally to parry. Guo Jing stepped forward to help his master, but Hong Qigong called out, “Just go to the mast, quickly!”
“I want to kill his nephew to avenge Big Brother Zhou,” Guo Jing replied.
“The snakes…the snakes!” Hong Qigong urgently warned him.
Guo Jing saw vipers slithering all around him, so he did not dare to linger much longer. With the back of his hand he grabbed Ouyang Ke’s ‘Flying Swallow Silver Shuttle’ [fei yan yin suo], then, leaping dozens of feet upwards, his left hand grasped the mast. At that very moment he heard the sound of an incoming projectile, so he shot the ‘yin suo’ from his hand and, with a loud clang, the two projectiles met midair; both changed directions towards the sides of the boat and fell into the sea. Guo Jing moved his hands and feet and in a short time he had reached the middle of the mast.
Ouyang Feng knew Hong Qigong also wanted to go up the mast so he intensified his attacks. Even though Hong Qigong was able to hold his ground he could not move towards the mast.
When Guo Jing saw the snakes crowding around his master’s feet he was very anxious; with a loud shout he wrapped his legs around the mast and hung his body down. Hong Qigong understood his intentions; his left foot kicked the deck, his right foot flew toward Ouyang Feng’s face while extending his dog beating stick towards Guo Jing. Guo Jing grabbed the end of his stick, pulled it upwards, and Hong Qigong’s body flew into the air. With a loud laugh Hong Qigong’s left hand caught the mast above Guo Jing. Now the two were high in the air looking down on their opponents and occupying a superior position.
Ouyang Feng knew that if he tried to climb the mast he would certainly be at a disadvantage, so he called out loudly, “Very well! We lost this time. Turn the rudder to the east!” With an abrupt turn the boat sailed to the east.
From high above the deck Hong Qigong and Guo Jing could see that the snakes were very dense on the deck. Hong Qigong sat comfortably on the sail yardarm while he loudly sang the ‘Falling Lotus Flower’ [lian hua luo], a song beggars sang when begging for food. His face showed calmness, but he was actually very anxious. “How long can we stay on this mast?” he wondered, “Even if the Old Poison doesn’t chop it down we still can’t climb down if he does not call off the snakes. Those two can drink wine and sleep, but all the two of us can do up here is eat wind and urinate. That’s it!” As soon as he remembered urinating, he stood up, pulled his pants down and sprayed his urine onto the snakes. “Jing’er,” he shouted, “Let those scoundrels drink your urine and quench their thirst.”
Guo Jing still enjoyed his childish side; he followed his master’s instructions while shouting happily, “Please! Be my guests!” Both master and disciple sprayed their urine about.
“Get the snakes out of here…quickly!” Ouyang Feng barked while at the same time leaping back several steps. He moved so fast that Hong and Guo Jing’s urine did not touch his body. Ouyang Ke, on the other hand, was startled upon hearing his uncle’s anxious call and some drops of urine splashed on his face and neck. He was a neat and fastidious person, so naturally he was indignant; then he suddenly remembered, “Our snakes fear urine!”
Amidst the sounds of the wooden whistle the snakes slowly slithered away, but dozens of them closest to the mast were drenched in urine. These vipers were all hybridized in the snake valley of Eagle Shooting Hero
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the Western Region where the White Camel Mountain was; their toxicity was extreme. Ouyang Feng had used big bamboo baskets hung between several hundred pairs of camels to transport these vipers thousands of li to the Central Plains. He intended to use them as weapons to dominate the Wulin world, but the snakes were affected by human excretions. As soon as they were wet they started to squirm around, coiling in confusion and biting each other; the snake herders were unable to control them.
Hong Qigong and Guo Jing laughed long and hard at seeing the chaotic situation they’d caused.
Guo Jing thought, “If Big Brother Zhou saw this I am sure he would be very happy. Ay! A major martial arts expert of this age had to die in the sea. Even with their level of martial arts skills, Island Master Huang and the Old Poison were still drenched by his urine; but my master’s and my urine did not even touch the Old Poison.”
About four hours later the sky gradually turned dark. The boat crew prepared banquet tables on the deck; meat and wine flowed freely and the sweet smelling aroma drifted upward assailing Hong Qigong and Guo Jing’s nostrils. Ouyang Feng was very shrewd; how long could a glutton like Hong Qigong endure this kind of torture? The gourd on Hong Qigong’s back was emptied only a short while later.
That night Hong Qigong and Guo Jing took turns on night watch duty. On the deck below them the crew lit dozens of lanterns, while a mass of snakes stayed on guard around the mast. They really did not have a chance of breaking this formidable defense, and they certainly could not urinate continuously.
Hong Qigong cursed Ouyang Feng’s ancestors back eighteen generations, creating every fabricated scandal he could think of while adding some spice to make the scandals even more dramatic; but Ouyang Feng did not even come out of his cabin. Hong Qigong cursed until his jaws were tired and he finally fell asleep.
Early the next morning Ouyang Feng sent a servant to shout loudly under the mast, “Hong Bangzhu, Guo Xiaoye [Clan Leader Hong, Young Master Guo], Master Ouyang has prepared a superb wine and food banquet for you to enjoy; please come down and enjoy it.”
“You go and invite Ouyang Feng to come out and we will serve him our urine!” Hong Qigong shot back.
Not long afterwards the banquet table was readied below the mast. The foods were steaming hot and looked like they were fresh from the kitchen. They placed two chairs on each side of the table; it seemed they were waiting for Hong Qigong and Guo Jing to come down and enjoy their banquet.
Several times Hong Qigong wanted to slide down the mast and gobble down the food, but he knew it must be poisoned; he had no choice but restrain himself. He was so upset and started his ‘your mother is a bitch’ and ‘you are a male dog with a bird’s brain’ series of curses.
By the third day the two were so hungry and thirsty that their heads began to spin. “If only my female disciple was here,” Hong Qigong sighed, “She is so smart that I am sure she would come up with something to counter the Old Poison’s tactics. All we can do is just stare and swallow our own saliva.” Guo Jing also sighed.
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About noon that day as the sun shone brightly, Guo Jing suddenly saw two white dots on the horizon. He thought they were a couple of white clouds, but the dots moved much too fast for clouds. They grew closer and got bigger and bigger and uttered loud cries. It was two white eagles.
Guo Jing was ecstatic; he curled his left fingers, put them in his mouth, and whistled repeatedly.
The eagles circled above the boat several times before diving down and perched on Guo Jing’s shoulders. They were indeed the pair of eagles Guo Jing had raised on the Mongolian Steppe.
“Master, could it be Rong’er is sailing this way?” he asked happily.
“That would be wonderful!” Hong Qigong replied, “Too bad these eagles are too small and can’t carry us away from here. We are stuck here, at loss as to what to do. Quickly tell her to come here and think of something.”
Guo Jing took out his dagger and cut two five inch square pieces from the sail and cut out two characters ‘you nan’ [lit. having trouble] on one and the outline of a gourd on the other piece. Then he strapped those pieces, one on each white eagle’s leg, and said, “Fly back quickly and get Miss Huang to come here.” The white eagles made some chirping sounds, stretched their wings, and flew from Guo Jing’s shoulders. They circled the boat once then flew towards the west.
About an hour after the white eagles left, Ouyang Feng again tried to entice Hong Qigong and Guo Jing into coming down from the mast by preparing another banquet table, loaded with food and wine. Hong Qigong was indignant, “The Old Beggar is a glutton and the Old Poison is using this dirty trick to torture me. I’ve practiced martial arts my whole life, but I have to admit my spiritual strength is rather lacking. Jing’er, what do you say we go down and beat them up real good?”
“The white eagles will have already delivered our message; I believe the situation will change very soon. Please be patient and wait a little bit longer,” Guo Jing replied.
Hong Qigong smiled. A while later he asked, “Among the world’s disgusting aromas, what do you say is the worst?”
“I don’t know. What is it?” Guo Jing replied.
“There was one time I wandered way up north. I was caught in a heavy snowstorm for eight days without any food; not even a squirrel could be found. I wanted to eat tree bark, but I couldn’t find any of that either. I randomly dug around in the snow-covered ground and was lucky enough to find five living things, so I could extend my life another day. The next day I found a yellow wolf and that was able to satisfy my hunger.”