Dragonbound(24)

I make a face. I can feel Amelrik’s gaze on me, but I can’t look at him. He thinks I let this happen. That I could have prevented it.
“Now, a paladin, on the other hand,” Bern goes on, “is a different story. There’s only one use for those. Well, two, since you’re a woman.”
My stomach twists. I really, really wish I’d listened to Amelrik. Oh, and that I had magic. Obviously. “What?”
“After we get you both back to the village, you’ll undo that ring for us. If you really are a St. George, there’s another hunting party we might make a trade with. They’ve been talking about going on a dragon hunt. Could be they’ll want a paladin to take along.”
I swallow, not liking the sound of any of that.
“And of course, if it turns out you’re lying about being a paladin, we won’t be able to sell you. Well, not to them, anyway. But like I said, you got two uses, being a woman and all.”
18
I’M VIRGINIA FREAKING ST. GEORGE
The hunters are marching us back to their village. We’re following a dirt road, and they’ve got our hands tied behind our backs, with ropes attached, like leashes. Every time they pull on them, it feels like my arms are going to come out of the sockets. There’s no way out of this, and they said their village isn’t far. We should be there sometime this afternoon.
Amelrik’s walking beside me. He leans in close and whispers, “Take the ring off.”
The hunters are absorbed in some story Bern is telling about catching a wild boar. I don’t think they’re paying attention, but I keep my voice low anyway. “I know what I promised, but—”
“I can save us—just not with this ring around my neck.”
“I can’t.”
He’s quiet for a second. “You’d rather I died. After everything that’s . . . You’d rather you were sold to hunters—who will make two uses out of you, do not doubt that—than give me my freedom.”
“If you had your freedom, you’d just leave.” A dragon could fight off these hunters, but he could also fly away and abandon me here.
“Is that what you think of me?”
Maybe. I don’t know. But . . . I look over at him and shake my head. Maybe he wouldn’t help me find Celeste if that ring wasn’t around his neck, if he didn’t need me to take it off, but I don’t believe he’d leave me here with these men. “It doesn’t matter what I think, because I . . . I can’t.” 
“You won’t, you mean.” His voice sounds bitter, betrayed, and I hate all the things he must be thinking about me.
“No, I mean I can’t. I lied to you. I needed your help, and I thought Celeste could do it, once we rescued her. I didn’t think something like this would happen.”
“What do you mean, you can’t? You’re a St. George.”
“Yeah, but why do you think they were marrying me off? You said yourself that I’m no paladin. Well, I’m not. I don’t even have magic.”
“But . . . No. I smelled it on you before. I know I did.”
“I was trying to learn so Father couldn’t force me to get married. Celeste was helping me. She stayed up all night, and that’s why she got captured. All this is my fault, and her helping me turned out to be for nothing. I managed to make a spark, but only once, and that was it.” My whole life, just one spark.
“But—”
My arms jerk behind me as the hunters pull on my leash. They do the same to Amelrik. I think maybe they’ve caught us talking, but then Bern announces they’re stopping for lunch.
There’s a clearing on the side of the road where someone’s set up a couple little tables and some logs to sit on.
They tie our leashes to a tree beside the clearing, then crowd around one of the tables and pull out a loaf of bread, a chunk of cheese, some apples, and some jerky from their packs.
My stomach growls, and my mouth waters.
Gavin hears my stomach and laughs. “No point in feeding you. But I might give you a scrap or two if you beg.” He looks right at me, and I know the offer—if you can call it that—doesn’t apply to Amelrik.
“But do sit down,” Bern says, in between tearing off a hunk of bread and stuffing cheese in his mouth. “Don’t let it be said that I’m not a gracious host.” He laughs, bits of food spraying out across their table.
Our leashes reach just past one of the logs. I entertain the idea of standing the whole time, to defy them and to look like I’m stronger than I am, but I’m too tired to put up a front. I sit down. The bark on the log is worn and not as uncomfortable as it looks, though it’s still kind of lumpy.
Amelrik sits down next to me. “You couldn’t have gotten that spark if you didn’t have magic.”
I glance at the hunters, to make sure they’re not paying attention. We were facing away from them on the road, but here they could easily look over and notice us talking. They seem to be too busy eating to care what we’re doing right now, though, so long as it’s not escaping.
“It was a total fluke,” I tell him. “And it was one spark—not even a spell. It was nothing.”
“No, it wasn’t. It was real. You think I don’t know the stink of paladin magic? Of St. George magic?” He makes a face, like even the words taste bad. “Magic isn’t just a spark. It’s something that’s in your blood. And if you have it, it’s there.”
“I’ve spent my whole life trying to do magic. What makes you think it would work now?”
“This is our only chance to get out of here, and you know what will happen to us if we don’t.”
“But—”
“They want to eat my heart.” He tilts his head, emphasizing how awful and ridiculous that is. “They’re barbarians. Worse than paladins, even.”
“Wow, thanks.”
“I can save us.”
“But I can’t.”
“You have to try. Please, Virgin—Virginia. Please. You have magic—you just have to use it.”“I don’t know how. And maybe I do have magic, somewhere, but it doesn’t feel like it.”
He considers that. “Maybe you don’t—”
“Want it enough? That’s what Celeste says.”
He scoffs. “And you’re risking your life for her?”
“She’s my sister. You don’t know her. I mean, you only know one side of her.”
“Does your heart beat because you want it to? Would your lungs stop working because you didn’t want air badly enough? Magic is like being alive. You don’t have to want it. It’s just there.”
Nobody’s ever talked about magic like that to me before. Like they don’t blame me for not being able to make it work. “But I still don’t know how to—”
“Hey!” Bern shouts. “No talking!” He eyes us suspiciously. “Lunch is over anyway. You two had best get up.” He motions for Sam and Gavin to untie our leashes from the tree.
“Try,” Amelrik whispers, getting to his feet.
Easy for him to say. But we don’t have much time, and he’s right. This is our only chance of getting out of this mess—I can’t just do nothing. I close my eyes and concentrate.
“What’s wrong with her?” Bern asks. Then, to me, he says, “You, girl, you’d better get up if you know what’s good for you.”
Fear squirms in my stomach and spreads through my chest, but I try to ignore it. Whatever they do to me now, it won’t be worse than what’s going to happen if we don’t get out of here.
“I said get up!”
“Don’t touch her!” Amelrik shouts. I open my eyes in time to see him step forward and take the blow Bern meant for me.
“A dragon protecting a paladin? Now I’ve seen everything.”
“Could be that she’s not a paladin,” Sam says. “Could be that she’s just a liar.”
I ignore them, shutting my eyes again and focusing on what I have to do. I try to think of magic like Amelrik said, as something that’s just there. I made a spark before. The magic exists, even if I don’t know how to use it.
Bern snorts. “Doesn’t matter what she is—this isn’t up for discussion. Someone get her up and let’s get going. I’ve got to walk off all that cheese I just ate.”
“Step aside, dragon,” Gavin says. “I’ll haul her off of there with the rope if I have to. Is that what you want?”
“Nobody hurts her.” Amelrik’s voice is low, almost a growl.
Goose bumps spread across my arms. There’s going to be a fight.
I hardly have time to register that thought before someone hits him. Hard. And then again. 
The sound makes me sick. He’s doing this for me. No, he’s doing this for both of us, but they’re going to beat the hell out of him, because I can’t take that ring off. The only thing that ever worked, that allowed me to make a spark, was thinking about how much I hated him. Or thought I did. And now there’s no chance of that, because I don’t. Because he’s maybe even sort of my friend—kind of my only friend right now—and all I know is I don’t want them to hurt him. I can’t let them put his head on their wall, or eat his heart, or any other crazy stuff they’re going to try. Maybe he’s only doing this because he needs me, not because he cares, but I care what happens to him. And I might not know him all that well, but if there’s even a chance of getting that ring off and getting out of here, I know he’ll stand there and take whatever they give him until he literally can’t anymore.