I rolled my eyes at the tired old joke. I didn't give a damn about American politics beyond how it directly affected my life and my people. "So what now? Obviously you're pissed off at me, which is why I find myself in a cargo container in what I can assume is Ukraine. But you don't want to kill me. I mean, why go to all the trouble and expense to bring me here from France just to shoot me? And where the hell is my brother?"
The man leaned his head back and started laughing like I'd just said the funniest thing in the world. He laughed for a long time before calming down, wiping at the corners of his eyes. "Oh, Felix, I don't want to kill you. No, not at all. Instead, I plan on changing you. Your father took a crown, I'm giving them a king to be their servant."
I couldn't help it, I laughed. "Good fucking luck. I serve no man."
"Of course not, I wouldn't demean you to serve a man," my captor said. "You will serve my niece instead. And you won't have a choice."
"I'd rather die," I said, and the man laughed.
"You still think you will have a choice in the matter. No, Felix, you won’t. Since you’re going to not care about this later anyway, let me tell you what’s going to happen. You’ll be crafted, in the ways started under the Soviets but perfected by others since then. Your will and your personality will be remolded into the image and shape that I choose. You’ll serve my niece, and in fact, you’ll love her completely. You will be her loyal, willing puppy dog. You will be happy to scrub her toilets, or to lie at the foot of her bed and guard her in her sleep. You’re a handsome man, well proportioned, she may even want to use you as her living, breathing sex toy. Only then, after you’re completely in her thrall, will she make the choice if you’re to live or die. It’s of no concern to me."
I shook my head. "That's impossible."
"Is it?" he asked. "There’s been advancements in chemistry, brain pattern recognition, and other sciences that most people are not even aware of, or if they are, they don’t know how to put together the different pieces for maximum effect. I happen to know men who do. And if you think that you’re going to be rescued by your brother, or even if you’re wondering about him, don't. Who do you think sold you out to me anyway?"
I felt my mouth drop open, unable to hide my shock at the simple truth in his voice. My captor stepped back and smirked. "Don’t worry, Felix. Soon enough, all of this will be nothing more than an unpleasant memory to you anyway."
The door closed, and I heard the latch shut, sealing me in. In the inky black darkness, the next sound filled my heart with fear, as the light hissing sound of gas being released into the container came to my ears, and my eyelids started to droop. I fought it as hard as I could, but it was irresistible. My last thought was only that I had to hold onto something because I had to get back to Jordan.
Chapter 26
Jordan
In the four days since Francois came back from Calais, I hadn't done much more than cry, sleep, and cry again. Francois came back, shaken up and his eyes haunted, telling me that they'd been double crossed. "One of them pulled a gun, and Felix pushed me out the door, trying to protect me. I ran for the car, hoping he would follow. I was halfway across the parking lot when the bullets . . .”
I had been unable to focus, and Francois drove us back to Valence, telling Charani and Syeira when we got back. Syeira had clothed herself in black, her body seeming to shrink as the days passed. I hardly noticed, depression washing over me every time I came out of sleep. The dreams were better. At least there, my Felix was still with me, holding my hand as we talked about our futures, about his leaving the life of crime or the possibility of having children. I saw myself growing older, but not caring as long as my Felix was with me, father to my children and nourisher of my soul. In my dreams, I didn't have to think about life without him.
The morning of the fifth day, I woke up to find Charani seated on the edge of my bed, a concerned look on her face. "You can’t stay in bed forever."
"Go away please,” I groaned, trying to roll over. It scared me slightly when I realized I was so weak from lack of food and water that I couldn't even do that. I thought back, and realized it’d been at least two days since I'd eaten or drank anything. "I just want to die."
"No you don't," she said softly, laying a hand on my shoulder. "It hurts, we’re all in pain, but you can’t give up. Francois needs you more than ever."
At the mention of Francois, I found the strength to open my eyes again.
"Oh, he won't say it, he's a man. His pride won’t let him admit any weakness, anything but the strength he thinks he needs to display with the position he’s now thrust into. He thinks he has to be some sort of Titan for you, for me, and for Syeira. But he’s just a man, and he needs you with him."