I drew in a deep breath. “I’m still upset. And despite what Michael and Allison have to say, I have a right to be upset.”
He nodded. “Yes, you do. Wait, what have they told you?”
I shook my head. “Let’s just say they’ve really let me know how much of a shithead I should still feel like.”
“What did they say to you?”
He took a step toward me as my back fell against the door.
“Don’t be mad at them. Please. There’s been enough anger.”
He approached me. “I’m not upset with them. But if they hurt you--”
“They didn’t hurt me. Just told me some hard truths I needed to hear.”
His body heat pulsed against me. “Like what?”
I swallowed hard. “Like… stuff. And, uh, things.”
“You might have to be a bit more specific about that.”
“Then you’re going to need to back up.”
“Do you want me to?”
My gaze slid up his body. As my palms pressed into the door, I felt my heart come alive. That black pit in my chest quickly filled with something akin to fire and my spine sizzled with a need for him. A need for this boy standing in front of me.
No, not boy.
Man.
“Rae?”
I swallowed hard. “Yeah?”
“What do you want?”
“You,” I whispered.
I stood on my tiptoes and captured his lips. Even if he pulled away from me, I wanted to taste him one last time. Commit it all to memory so I could conjure it no matter where life led me. I didn’t know where we stood. I didn’t know what would become of us. But I did know one thing.
I’d never stop loving this man in front of me.
He didn’t pull away, so I took that as a good sign. My tongue softly fell against his lips as my hand cupped his cheek. It slid through his hair, feeling those soft tendrils for the first time in what seemed like years. Though I knew that wasn’t really the case. I cupped the back of his head, holding his lips to mine.
And when a growl worked its way up his throat, my body sizzled for more.
His hands fell against the door. His body pressed against my own. His heat robbed me of my breath and I felt my knees trembling. I wanted his affection. I needed his touch. My mind spun out of control as his lips finally parted for me. I moaned down the back of his throat. He let me explore his mouth, not fighting me in the slightest. His touch set my skin on fire, and for the first time since getting to this fucking hotel I felt at peace.
With life.
With love.
With work.
With school.
With the future.
With… everything.
“Clint,” I moaned.
His arms cloaked my back. He picked me up and pulled me away from the door. He tossed me onto the bed, his eyes watching me as I bounced. I reached out for him and he collapsed into my arms. His lips pressed against mine and the world tilted on its axis. I opened myself up for him. Gave myself over to him as he stripped me of my clothes and they fell to the floor in piles.
And I didn't stop tugging at his clothes until his skin met mine.
“Clint.”
“Fuck, Rae.”
“Don’t stop. Do whatever you want.”
“Dangerous words, gorgeous.”
I looked into his eyes. “Whatever. You want.”
He growled before his lips captured mine once more. He raked his teeth over my lower lip as he frogged his knees out, spreading my legs wide. I felt him. All of him. His hands pinned my wrists down as his lips slid down my neck. I arched for him. I felt my breasts puckering at the heat of his breath. He lapped at my nipples, sending me spiraling as he pinned me beneath him.
Preventing me from moving.
“So beautiful.”
I gasped. “Oh.”
“So smart.”
“Clint, please.”
“So mine.”
He growled those last two words before he moved between my legs. He flopped onto his stomach, bouncing my body against the mattress. With his face between my thighs and his hands still around my wrists, he pulled my arms down. Arching my back and pulling my hips closer to his mouth.
Before his tongue pierced me.
“Clint!”
He lapped me up. And with every stroke of his tongue, I saw the heavens part. Fire burned through my body as I shook for him. He controlled every aspect of my movements, from my thighs jumping to my back arching. He manipulated me into a position I’d never been in before. The pain increased with the pleasure as lines began to blur. I didn’t know whether to tell him to stop or keep going. I didn’t know whether to tap out or double down. He folded my body. Pinned my arms. Arched my back further by tugging on my wrists. His tongue pulled floods of arousal from me, dripping down my skin and coating his cheeks. His stubble made my eyes roll back. My toes curled into his skin, though I couldn't have told anyone what part of his body my feet touched.
“Clint,” I choked out.
“There it is, gorgeous.”
He pressed his tongue deep between my folds and I soared over the edge. He lapped me deeply, slurping me down and drinking what I had to offer him. I trembled for his viewing pleasure. I felt my walls quivering with a need for him. My breasts jumped and my world spiraled into a dark expanse of nothingness.
And as my back dropped to the bed, he rushed up my body.
His lips crashed against mine before he slid deep inside me. Our bodies moved as one, his hips snapping against mine. My vision grew blurry with tears of happiness. He pinned me down and took me in all the ways I remembered. How I had missed him. This closeness. This passion. It seemed few and far between for us nowadays.
I wanted it to last forever.
“Rae. Fucking hell, Rae. Shit. You feel so--so good.”
I moaned. “I love it when you growl. Do it again.”
He did as I asked and goosebumps slid along my skin. He pulled out and flipped me over before pinning my face against the mattress. With his hand wrapped up tightly in my hair and his cock seated between my thighs, he pressed into me, taking me from behind as his pelvis slapped against my ass cheeks. I groaned into the sheets, taking what he had for me as his dick thickened against my walls. His balls smacked my clit, sending my eyes rolling back as my toes curled so deeply my calves cramped.
“Clint. Clint. Clint. Yeah, don’t stop. Please. Please. Please. More. More. More.”
“So close. That’s it. I’m coming. Rae. I’m co--co--min--”
He exploded inside me and my heart seized in my chest. I held my breath, unable to speak as his pulsing cock pushed me over the edge. The world around me sizzled. Colors burst and died against the darkness behind my eyelids. My entire body shivered as our intermingled arousal dripped against my skin. Down my folds. Along my thighs. Coating me in the memory we created.
“Clint,” I choked out.
He collapsed against me, his cock still sheathed inside my body. He panted against the pillow just above my head as he weighed me down against the mattress. I moaned. I shivered. I panted for air as my heart restarted itself. Fluttering wildly before settling down, as if I had come back to life.
As if Clint’s body had pulled me back from certain death.
Neither of us spoke. I didn’t dare disturb the moment. As Clint lay there, like my own personal weighted blanket, I thought about that list. All the research. All the suggestions. Completely and totally devoid of any personal bias on his part. How was he capable of it? I sure as hell wasn’t. I’d never been capable of such selflessness. I always wondered what I’d get out of it. Or what I’d get at the end of a particular project. Or class. Or goal.
Clint continued to amaze me with every day that passed.
“I love you,” I whispered.
But, if he heard me, he did a damn good job of acting as if he hadn’t.
And my mind quickly spiraled back into the darkness he’d pulled me from.
Does he even love me anymore?
34
Clinton
I heard the words, but I didn’t know if I believed her. My heart fluttered, but I felt my gut cringing. I mean, what was I supposed to say? I loved Rae. I really did. But I didn’t feel loved. Was I supposed to tell her everything would be all right? That we were fine? That we’d be okay?
Was I supposed to lie to the girl I loved?
I didn’t want to say anything that would start another fight. So I kept my mouth closed. I let my eyes fall shut as I held her, feeling her even breaths rise and fall against my own. I held her close, tightening my grip around her body. And as we drifted in and out of sleep, I let my mind wander.
I let sleep take hold.
Every time Rae moved, I moved with her. Every time I shifted, she shifted along with me. It felt good, having her there. But the rift was still present. We needed to talk. Even in a dead sleep, I knew that much. Every time my eyes peeked open, I was reminded of the reality waiting for me. Every time I snuggled tight against her body, I was reminded of the conversation headed my way.
But I needed rest if we were going to tackle it tonight.
“Clint?”
Her soft voice against the shell of my ear made me groan.
“Mm?”
“Clint, you gotta wake up. Allison wants to go out to dinner.”
I rolled over. “Five more minutes.”
Rae giggled. “We can get more rest tonight. But right now, we have to get ready.”
Her giggle made me grin as she helped me upright. My eyes slowly fell open and I was disappointed at the sight of her clothed body. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her down on top of me. She laughed with delight as my hands slid up and down her legs. Gripping her ass cheeks. Massaging her hips.