I blinked. “We need to get you some water and some food.”
Then, some asshole I didn’t recognize stepped in on behalf of our girlfriends.
“Come on, guys. Your girls are having a good time. I’m Lance. This is Chris and DeShawn. The two blondes are Kristie and Kayla. Meredith’s the one with the bow in her hair. Why don’t you guys stay and have a drink? I promise, we don’t bite.”
I felt Mike seething with anger. I peeked over at him and saw his nostrils flaring. And when I saw he wasn’t going to give in, I nodded, not giving him a chance to respond.
“Sounds like a plan,” I said.
Rae sighed with relief, but Ally kept glancing over at her boyfriend. Mike stood tight at her side, claiming what was his in front of the guys. I knew all too well about that game. And he’d figure out at some point that it was a game that never worked. Eventually, Ally would feel smothered. And she’d either talk with him about it or leave.
Then again, I felt myself hovering around Rae, too.
“Clint, back off a bit, would you? I can barely breathe.”
“Honey, seriously. Your elbow’s in my ribcage.”
“Clint, just--there. Like that.”
Every time I tried to touch her, she shrugged me off. Every time I tried to offer her something, she waved her hand in the air. Like she was trying to shoo away a needless fly. I didn’t like this. Not one bit. The alcohol seemed to change Rae, and not for the better. I understood that road all too well. I didn’t want her to make the same mistakes I did.
And yet, as she dragged Ally off for another drink, I saw her making those mistakes.
I was helpless to stop her from ruining herself tonight.
“Come on, man. Is this really their scene?”
Mike’s voice pulled me from my trance and I sighed.
“I mean, Ally’s having a new experience. Rae’s getting the lay of the land when it comes to college. What can we really do?”
He snickered. “The hell are you talking about? You always know what to do. Rae’s never been like this around you. How do you fix it?”
I shrugged. “Like you said, she’s never been like this around me. I don’t know how to fix it. I’m not really sure there’s anything to fix.”
“You’re right. There isn’t.”
I looked over at where the tinny sound came from and I saw one of the blondes walking up to us.
“Kayla?”
She shook her head. “Kristie. You really should lay off the two of them.”
Mike jumped in. “Or what?”
I glared at him. “Dude, take a breath.”
Kristie snickered. “You know, this kind of behavior is the exact reason why good girls like them dump their boyfriends before coming to college.”
I paused. “Excuse me?”
She smiled. “You heard me. Coming to this party. Getting angry that they’re drinking. Getting jealous of other guys watching them. That kind of behavior gets you dumped, gentlemen.”
Mike shook his head. “My girlfriend and I are going to the same college. She’d never do that to me.”
The girl giggled. “Do you even hear how stupid you sound right now?”
I stepped in. “You can tuck in that language with my boy here.”
She ran her gaze down my body. “Then listen closely. If you try to check your girls all the time on their actions, they’re going to start hiding things from you. It’s only natural. They’ll do what they want, but they won’t include you. College is to let them fly freely. To help people experience things. You want to be there for that? Then enjoy it with them. But if you don’t…” She looked between us and giggled. And with those words, she turned around and left.
“If we don’t, what?” Mike asked.
I sighed. “If we don’t, they’ll dump our asses. That’s what she means.”
21
Raelynn
“Follow me,” I whispered.
Allison craned her neck back. “Where are we going? Should we tell the guys?”
I rolled my eyes. “Do you really want to check in with Michael every step of every day that you take? Because that’s what he’s making you do right now. And I know you’re uncomfortable.”
“I--I mean--I’ve just never seen Michael like that before.”
I snickered. “Well, it’s called ‘jealousy.’ And he’ll get over it. Or he won’t, and he’ll turn into an insecure little dick.”
“You think he’d really do that?”
“I think he’s doing it now. What do you think?”
I stopped in the middle of the living room dance floor and stared down my best friend. The boys were trying to ruin this night for us, but I wasn’t having any of it. Allison was finally having her first drink! Just some wine, but I was proud of her. Finally, she felt comfortable enough to have new experiences. Make new friends. Branch out and try things and step out of her comfort zone a little bit. I was beyond proud of her. I mean, it wasn’t like she was chugging back bottles without any regard for herself.
Just a damn glass of wine.
“I think we should go back and find them,” she said.
I grabbed her arm. “Oh, no you don’t. You're staying with me.”
Allison sighed. “But what if he’s upset? Or not doing well?”
I smiled. “Then he’s got his buddy. Clint. We’re here to have fun. I want to celebrate my best friend’s first drink.”
She blushed. “I’ve had some of my mother’s wine before.”
“But this isn’t your mother’s wine. This is your wine. Come on. Let’s go out onto the porch. I need some room to breathe, don’t you?”
I tugged her through the gyrating bodies of the living room before we stumbled out onto the porch. The smell of weed hung heavily in the air and it turned my head. There was smoke pouring around the corner. Allison started coughing softly as I moved away from her.
“Where are you going, Rae?”
I furrowed my brow. “Just to check things out. You wanna come, or are you staying?”
I looked back, watching as she shook her head. “No, thank you. I’m staying behind.”
“Suit yourself!”
I found my way around the corner and saw Kayla sitting with Meredith. They smiled up at me before Meredith patted the seat on the porch swing next to her. A couple of guys I didn’t recognize leaned against the porch railing. One of them had a joint in his hand, and he inhaled deeply. Holding his breath. Staring straight at me before puffing the smoke back out.
And slapping me in the face with it.
“Want some?” he asked.
Meredith grinned. “It’s the good kind. Just one puff will relax you.”
Kayla giggled. “And by the sounds of it, you do need to relax a little bit. Did you shake off your entourage?”
I shook my head. “What?”
Meredith lowered her voice. “The boy that keeps ruining your evening? Did you shake him?”
Kayla snorted. “See why girls dump their boyfriends before college? They all do that. They all get possessive and weird and clingy. Happened to me. Happened to Mere. It’ll happen to you.”
The guy handed me the joint. “Try it. Take it in slowly, hold, then let it out.”
I looked down at what looked like a large turd. I wrinkled my nose at it, the smell already getting to me. But I wanted to fit in. I wanted to make friends. I wanted to fucking relax. I looked around, making sure Clint wasn’t anywhere to be seen. Then I saw down next to ‘Mere.’
She patted my back. “There you go. The first hit’s gonna be rough. Just work through it. Force your lungs to take it all in.”
I nodded as the guy handed me the rolled-up joint. I sighed as I held it to my lips, tentatively sucking on it. The smoke filled my lungs and I already felt my body working against it. My throat jumped as I opened my lungs, forcing the smoke to go in.
“That’s it.”
“Hold it.”
“One, two, three.”
“Now, let it out and do it again. Quickly. Come on, come on.”
I let out the smoke and quickly took another puff. Only this time, it went down a little smoother. I sucked a bit more down for good measure, then held my breath as I handed it off to Meredith. She smiled at me before taking a puff, and I felt the world slowly tilting around me. I felt lighter than air. Relaxed, and full of happiness.
And as I let out the smoke, the guys in front of me clapped.
“Ten seconds. Good one.”
“You want in on another round?”
I nodded. “Oh, hell yeah.”
I sank back into the porch swing with Meredith. She threw her leg over my lap as my head fell back. The joint came back around to me and I lifted my head long enough to take a long drag of it. My lungs filled with the smoke and I battled to keep it down. I let myself fall away from my own mind. I didn’t think about anything. Not my mother. Not orientation. Not Allison, or Michael, or Clint. Not home, or my money issues. Nothing, except the fact that it felt like my body was floating around in the air.
“Oh, this feels so nice,” I moaned.
Meredith groaned. “Here comes trouble.”
My head snapped up. “What?”
“Rae? Are you serious?”
My eyes slowly panned over to the corner and I saw Clint emerge. He walked around, his gaze landing directly on me. Smoke from the joint caught his gaze and he snickered. He shook his head, like he was some sort of disappointed parent.