“Why don’t you get dressed and I’ll be right back. Oh. Did you want to start on birth control pills?”
Lily paused and then nodded. Might as well. The doctor smiled and left the room so Lily could put her clothing back on. Doctor Guthrie returned a few minutes later with sample packs of oral contraceptives and some pamphlets. She plopped onto the rolling stool and scooted over to Lily.
“Your pelvic exam was normal. Your Pap smear will take a few days to get results back. The incision site looks just fine. Doctor Burns did a great job and your scarring will be minimal. You can resume normal activities, within reason.”
Lily smiled. “So I can start working now?” At the doctor’s nod she asked, “Can I exercise? Clay has an elliptical machine I’d like to use. I need to lose weight.”
The doctor nodded. “Yes. Within reason. No training for marathons, though.”
Lily rolled her eyes and chuckled. “I’m just anxious to get started…Now that I’m starting over.”
“Will you be in Divine long?”
“This is my hometown. I’m back for good. I have a house I’ll be working on making livable, but in the meantime I’m staying with Clay.”
“I’d like to talk to you about the other information in your medical file.” At Lily’s cautious nod she continued. “I remember seeing old bruises on your face at the accident scene. The question of whether you’ve suffered domestic violence is moot now, judging by what I can see here. Your old medical records indicate you’ve suffered a concussion and several broken bones over the years. I saw scarring on your back and under your left breast when I examined you.”
Heart pounding, Lily finally gave voice to the words. “Yes. My husband—ex-husband—abused me. I left him last week. I’m divorcing him.”
“How are you coping?”
Lily looked at her hands, unsure how much information Emma really wanted. “I talk to Clay…and I’ve been writing in a diary. That probably sounds pretty lame…”
Emma patted her forearm. “Actually that’s a very productive step toward healing. I’m glad Clay’s there for you. He’s one of the good guys, which I’m sure you already know.”
Boy, do I ever.
“Keep journaling if it’s helping. I’ll refer you to a counselor because it’s likely that you’re suffering with PTSD. Layla Walker is a professional therapist here in Divine whom you can talk to about what’s happened to you. She’s very experienced with survivors of domestic abuse.” Emma handed her a business card and a pamphlet on the subject. “I can also give you a referral if you’d like to have laser tattoo removal done. Success of the procedure is limited by the size, type of ink, and depth of the tattoo.”
I’m willing to have the thing cut out if I have to. “Actually, I would very much like to have it removed. Is surgery an option?”
Emma’s brow wrinkled, and she handed her a pamphlet about the laser procedure. “Yes, but you’d have a lot of scarring and I’m not sure a surgeon would agree to it because of the large area it covers. I’d try laser removal first. There’s one other option, but first I want to ask a question. How did you feel about getting the tattoo, before it was done? Were you willing?”
Lily swallowed, a little embarrassed as she recalled her eager acquiescence to JT, early in their marriage. Doctor Guthrie would probably think she was a total flake for getting tattooed without first approving the design. “Actually, I was all for it. I don’t have a problem with tattoos in general, but I thought it was going to be something pretty. He said he wanted to surprise me, that I would like it. In the beginning, I loved how dominating he was. It made me feel safe, like he had everything under control. I probably should’ve had my head examined for liking that about him. He told me to trust him and I was…really stupid. Naïve.”
Emma frowned. “You put your trust in someone who hurt you. It happens, but I don’t think you’re stupid. The reason I asked about your willingness is that you might be able to have the tattoo redone. It would still be large, but it would be a design of your choosing and another step away from your old life. There’s a new tattoo artist in town who opened shop recently. Divine Ink or something like that. In any case, take your time making that decision. I just wanted to give you options.”
“Thank you, Doctor Guthrie.”
“Call me Emma.”
“Thank you, Emma,” Lily stammered then grinned, feeling relieved. “Clay said…”