Lydia gave her a sympathetic smile and squeezed her shoulder.
“Val and Ransome?” Lydia asked quietly.
“I’m so silly.”
Lydia shook her head, making her brunette waves bounce around her shoulders. “Not silly. They’re hot as hell. Even a very happily married woman like me can see that. And they’re such decent guys, even though they look like total bad boys.”
A chuckle escaped from Jessica and she nodded. “They’re wonderful.” She sat up straight, thinking she sounded ridiculous, and prayed Lydia would let the subject drop.
“You know, that’s something Divine seems to be blessed with. Sure, we have our fair share of crazies that find their way here, but we have a lot of good guys in this town, too. Really good guys,” Lydia said as she looked toward the front of the club and waved. Jessica turned to see who she was waving at and cringed.
Just what my battered ego needs right now.
Jessica wanted to crawl under the table and proceeded to slouch down into her chair but Lydia stopped her. “Oh, no you don’t, missy. It’s time to break the ice…again.”
“Easy for you to say, Lydia, you didn’t break your water all over Tank or totally lose your dignity with Troy in the room while you pushed an eight pound baby out of your vagina!”
Lydia snickered. “Oh psshh! There was a curtain separating you.”
“He could hear me!”
“You weren’t even aware he was in the room with you.”
“Yeah, but once I remembered, I wanted to die from embarrassment. And I had to share the rest of my story with them. I would just as soon they’d never known.”
Lydia tilted her head and had an indecipherable look on her face. “You know they don’t judge you for what happened to you, honey. They both stayed because they weren’t about to let Dornan get anywhere near you. In my book they’re just as heroic as Val and Ransome. And…”
“And what?” Jessica asked as she watched Troy and Tank make their way to the bar where they ordered beers.
“And I think their feelings are wounded because you haven’t talked much with them since Bella was born.”
“I’m so embarrassed. You weren’t down at the creek when it happened, Lydia. It was like…well…I might as well have just peed all over Tank. And then they find out that I was a sex slave to a psychotic misogynist who got me pregnant. How could they possibly look at me and not have that come to mind? And what came after…well, there’s hardly anything earthier than giving birth to a baby—”
“During which Troy cheered you on as if that baby was his.”
Jessica’s inner litany of all the reasons why she could hardly even look either redheaded hunk in the eye continued on. She’d been through a trauma the year before and was still dealing with the repercussions of it and likely would for some time to come. They’d seen her at her absolute worst. Couple that with her long-lasting and apparently fruitless crush on Val and Ransome and she was one hot mess—then Lydia’s words finally registered.
“He what?” She must’ve been either totally out of it or completely focused on giving birth and didn’t remember.
Lydia nodded. “He spoke encouragingly to you the whole time. It was really sweet. I think it really bothered him to hear you in pain. And Tank checked in with him several times through a crack in the door. If I’d known you had a thing for Val and Ransome I would’ve told you. I just never realized.” Then she pointed to the two men who were now making their way over to the group of tables Jessica and Lydia sat at. “They ask me all the time how you’re doing.”
Jessica closed her eyes and her litany played again, along with the embarrassing imagery from the bank of the Divine Creek. And they knew the truth of how Bella came to be. She cringed, imagining them looking at her with pity for what had happened to her or wondering what her situation had been like while she was held captive. “I just can’t, Lydia. Every time I think about it, I see the horrified look in Tank’s eyes when I…gushed all over him.”
Her friend smiled sympathetically and nodded. “They wouldn’t pressure you. You’ve been through a lot lately. Maybe it’s best to just take things slow, one day at a time. Hormones can have lingering effects and your feelings could change.”
She had been hormonal lately, as was to be expected, with adjusting to nursing and dealing with a newborn. Those were just two more reasons in a long list of reasons why she couldn’t seriously pursue a relationship. The disappointment of finding out that Val and Ransome were officially off the market, and evidently had been for a while, was just the topper.