"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, but I saw you at the bar those nights when you were drunk with your friend and laughing and looking at me through the window of my shop. I knew exactly who you were when you came in."
I stare at him. "Are you serious?"
He nods. "I thought you were cute, and when I saw you at my shop, I thought you came in to ask me on a date but were just too nervous to say anything. That's why I was messing with you about the fairy and butterfly tattoos, and kind of being a dick. I guess that was my terrible way of flirting."
I gasp, mocking outrage. "You thought I was cute? Cute is for puppies and newborns."
He smiles and comes over to my side of the table, sitting next to me. He kisses my check and neck, and finally, my lips. "You're more than cute. You're sexy as hell and I love everything about you."
I can't help but wonder what Kia would've thought about all of this. Here was the man on her bucket list and now he's in love with me, and I'm in love with him. This doesn't feel like her bucket list anymore. I guess it never did.
When Max and I get back home, all I want to do is go home and veg out for the next week. But there's no time to sleep off the jet lag. My vacation time is running out and Max will also have to go back to work soon. Real life is crashing down on us, but there's still one last task to do and one last envelope to open.
We go to the town where Kia grew up and the ice cream shop she loved as a kid. It's a little cold out for ice cream, but it doesn't seem to stop anyone. The place is packed and there's nowhere to park so we have to park on the side of the road and cross the street. The ice cream shop is in a rustic building nestled in the middle of a town with only three stop lights. We go inside. The décor looks as though it hasn't been updated since the 1970s. Everything is covered in sun-bleached flowers, from the benches to the wall paper. It's really hideous to look at but the ice cream is to die for. Max gets mint chocolate chip, while I order Kia's favorite: rose. I've never tried rose flavored anything. Oddly enough, it's delicious.
We sit in a booth by the window, watching the cars go by. Max sits right beside me and I lay my head on his shoulder, thinking. I guess because this place was her favorite, it makes me think of her and of one of the last times I was with her. We were snuggled up in her bed and she was asking me questions about my plans after she was gone, just as Max had done at the pub in Scotland. I tried to change the subject then too. I hated the idea that Kia was going to die, but there was nothing anyone could do about it. In the back of my mind I held out hope that somehow, someone would figure out a way to save her. I was in total denial.
She didn't even seem upset about it. In the beginning she was, especially when her pacemaker wasn't working the way it should have been, and after all the surgeries had failed. But something happened after that, I'm not sure what, but she changed. She had accepted her fate far more than the rest of us. Her family and I were the only ones still holding on. She kept telling me I needed to live my life when she was gone and find happiness anywhere I could. I told her there was no such thing as happiness without her and that was that. I didn't want to talk about it anymore. She didn't say anything after that, just sat there looking thoughtful. Actually, she looked like she was plotting. A week later she died.
"Kia was up to something," I say.
Max looks at me, licks the green ice cream from his lips. "What do you mean?"
"I don't think this trip was about her."
He smiles. "I never thought it was-at least not after I got to know you. When you told me about Kia, I knew that wasn't her bucket list, it was yours."
"What, why didn't you say that?"
He shrugs. "This was obviously important to her, and to you, so it wasn't my place to speculate."
"I'm reading the last envelope."
"Do it. You're at the last place, having ice cream. You completed the task."
I pull it out of my purse. Max leans closer to read it too.
Dear Fiona,
I'm sure by now you've probably figured out that these adventures are more about you than they are about me. If this were truly my bucket list, you'd probably still be lost after spelunking in a cave right now. But this isn't about me. My only regret would have been for you to continue to mourn me after I'm gone and not live the most epic life you possibly could. Your heart is too big to keep it contained to little ol' me. Spread that shit around. Bring joy and love to others the way you have to me, and make sure you get it in return.
Love always and forever,
Kia
I put my fist to my mouth to hold in the sob that's aching to get out. Max puts his arms around me. Everything about his touch is safe and comforting.
"Come on," he says. "Let's go home."
Epilogue
"How's it feeling?" Max asks as the needle glides across the skin of my upper arm. We're going on three hours of my tattoo.
"I'm okay."
We've been married almost three years now and it never gets old watching him work, the way the front of his hair hangs down over his forehead, that deep focus he has. He really is a master of his craft and I love being around him when he's being creative.
He sits back and admires his work. "All done. Go to the mirror and check it out."
What a relief. I didn't want to tell him how much it hurt because I didn't want to look like a baby and be like the people his co-workers complain about. I'm glad he was able to do my tattoo when we were alone and the shop was closed.
I stand in front of the full-length mirror. "Oh my God," I say, trying not to cry when I see the stunning tattoo.
It's a heart with wings and roses and a banner going through it that says ‘Kia'. It's dated two years ago when our daughter was born. I named her after my best friend. After all, I wouldn't have a daughter by this lovely man had my best friend not encouraged it.
Max steps up behind me and puts his hands on my shoulders. "You like it?" he asks.
"I love it."
He kisses the bare skin of my shoulder, then trails kisses up my neck. I close my eyes and focus on the way his soft lips are so familiar and how they know exactly where to land. He has an intimate knowledge of every part of my body and knows what turns me on the most. His hands go under my shirt. He unhooks my bra so that it hangs loose. He then reaches around to cup my breasts and tweak my nipples, sending bolts of lightning to my clit as if those two body parts were one in the same.
He turns me around and lifts my shirt up and over my arms, careful not to touch the fresh tattoo, and tosses it to the side. It's a good thing the curtains are drawn over the storefront windows. His mouth engulfs one of my breasts while his hand continues to kneed the other. I run my fingers through his thick dark hair and watch him expertly kiss and lick and suck at my nipples.
He backs up and looks at me. "How are you my wife? How the hell did I get so lucky?"
I brush one of his long eyelashes off his cheek, then continue to caress his handsome face. "You're about to get even luckier."
He smiles and his hands make their way down to the waistband of my shorts and he pulls them off. I step out of them and kick them to the side. He kisses his way down my stomach and to my panties where he sniffs long and deep.
"I love your scent," he says. "I'm addicted to it." He gives it another sniff and gently bites the fabric.
He pulls my panties down and licks the top of my mound, not penetrating between the folds. It drives me crazy because I know how capable he is with his tongue, but he's holding back. He wants to make sure it's torture for me, waiting until I can't stand it anymore, until I beg for it.
His tongue is so wet and soft and warm. It doesn't take long before I'm thrusting my hips at his face, prompting him to go deeper, to slide his tongue in just a little. He smiles at my eagerness, but refuses to comply with my wishes.
"I'm going to start fucking your nose if you're not careful," I tell him.
He laughs. "That sounds kinky. I'm into it."
I roll my eyes and take one of his hands that is resting on my hip and try to urge him to finger me. "Nope," he says.
I groan. "You're mean."
"No, I'm evil."
I have to scoff at that. There's not an evil bone in his body. But he is a damn tease.
I push him and he falls backwards, laughing as I stand above him. "Take off your clothes or you'll see who's the evil one," I say.
His smile stretches across his entire face. "Yes ma'am."
He takes off his shirt then his jeans. His huge, proud cock springs free from the confines of his boxers.
I reach for my purse on the chair and grab a condom.
"No," he says, reaching up and taking it out of my hand. He tosses it to the side. "I think it's time we make Kia a little brother."