Dirty Dom(38)

“Did you happen to grab any makeup?” I ask quietly. It feels wrong to ask for things from him. But there are so many bags on the bed. I see a few names I recognize, Nordstrom’s, Clinique, Gymboree, J. Crew. A Cartier bag catches my eyes and I inhale a sharp breath. You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. What would I need jewelry for? Surely, that’s not for me. And it sure as fuck isn’t for Jax.

“Clara did. I gave her the black Amex so I’m sure she just went crazy with it.” He answers casually and I just try to take it all in.

I pick up the Clinique bag and spot a few skin care items, but no make up. I shift through the bags and under a La Perla bag with perfumed tissue paper is a bag with Lancome make up. A shit ton of make up. I pick it up along with the Clinique bag and take it to the bathroom.

“Take your time, doll.” I give him a tight smile with my head down. I don’t like this. I feel… cheap. At the same time my lack of gratitude eats away at me.

“I’ll pay you back for everything.” I manage to get out as I turn the handle to the en suite.

“You can afford all that?” He asks, his voice laced with disbelief. I look at the bed and try to take it all in. If I sold my restaurant today. Maybe. I bite the inside of my cheek. “You’re not paying me back, Becca.”

I let his words sink in. They dig at my pride. I don’t need his help. Fuck. Yes I do. I have to accept that. But I wish I didn’t.



I’m covered from head to toe. A cream, boat-neck cashmere sweater covers my wrists and the bruises on my arms. Dark burgundy yoga pants and a pair of comfy socks cover everything from my hips down. I don’t think I’ve ever worn such luxurious clothing. It looks the same as some clothing I have and it’s definitely my style, but it feels like heaven.

I haven’t met Clara yet, but I like her. Or at least her taste in clothes. Although the scrap of material she calls underwear is not my taste. It’s cute though. Lacy and delicate. Dom would shred it easily. My thighs clench thinking of him ripping through it and taking me again. I bite my bottom lip and scold myself. I know I’m trying to distract myself from everything that happened today, but that kind of behavior wouldn’t be wise.

The doctor left Dom my pills. I took another codeine and a Valium and I’m not in much pain at all now. Other than my ribs being a bit sore making my way down the stairs. I have to wince through the pain, but other than that, there’s nothing. I feel too relaxed. I wish I hadn’t taken the Valium; it makes me tired.

A small smile plays on my lips as I hear Jax laughing. We round the corner of the hall to a large open living room. And there he is, with a monster truck in hand standing on the back of the sofa about to push it down a ramp of cushions. It warms my heart all the way down to my toes. My little man. Relief floods through me. Thank God.

In that moment I feel so much gratitude for Dom. Emotions well in my chest and I push them away. My hand reaches for Dom’s and I squeeze. I don’t know why. But it’s all I can do. He gives my hand a squeeze back and looks at me with curiosity.

I know I’m in this shit because of him. I’m painfully aware of how fucking stupid I was. And even more so of how Rick is why I’m in this shit in the first place. But he didn’t have to help me. He didn’t have to make sure Jax was safe. He didn’t have to come rescue me. I can’t fucking help the tears running down my face. It’s just too much for me to handle. To much for me to accept. I push my back against the wall and try to calm myself. Jax is just around the corner after all; I don’t want him to see me like this.

“You alright, doll?” Dom brushes my tears away with his thumb. He looks like he doesn’t know what to do. And that makes me laugh. I must look fucking crazy. Crying out of no where and then laughing at him. Maybe I am crazy at this point. Maybe this was all I could take. Judging by the look on Dom’s face, he may be thinking I’ve lost it too.

“I’m okay. I could be better, but I’m okay.” I finally answer. I wipe my tears and look down at my fingers to make sure I haven’t fucked up the concealer. Nothing. They’re clean. This is some good shit to withstand tears.

I push myself off the wall and, to my surprise, Dom wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me into him. His embrace is warm and comforting. I shouldn’t like it so much. He’s practically a stranger and definitely a dangerous man. I lean into him knowing all of that. I just need it.

As soon as I round the corner and Jax catches a glimpse of me, I kneel down and open my arms for him.

“Mommy!” He yells out, dropping the truck and running to me. It hurts when he slams into my chest, but I don’t care. It feels so good just to hold him. I kiss his forehead and just hold him until he starts to push me away.