Dirty Bad Secrets(80)
“Why?” I sighed. “Why do you have to have everything? Why does it have to be such a fucking battle?”
She shrugged and her eyes were honest, so honest. “I want to be worth it. I want to be worth everything.”
My stomach twisted, a horrible feeling. And there was something strange beneath it, something unfamiliar. Need. Vulnerability. Some other sappy bullshit. If I could’ve doused it in petrol and set it alight, I would have, but she was in me, right the way through me, her siren fingers reaching out to steal my fucking soul.
Things were getting crazy, spiralling out of control and I didn’t have the first fucking clue how to stop them, or if I wanted to. I didn’t know how to go with the flow, either. Basically, I knew fucking shit, and it was uncomfortable. Really uncomfortable.
“I don’t know how to give everything. I don’t even know what that means, Faye.”
Her smile was dirty and absolutely fucking delicious. “I want to fuck you,” she said, simply. “I want to take you the way you take me.”
“You actually want to fuck me? For fucking real? Jesus Christ.”
She nodded. “That’s exactly what I want. I want you on your knees, I want you to look at me the way I look at you. I want you to look at me the way I looked at Vince, like I’m everything. Everything, Andy, like the world begins and ends with me. That’s what I want. That’s what I need.”
“You don’t want fucking much, then?” I shook my head. “I don’t think I can do that, Faye. It isn’t who I am.”
“You don’t think you can do it. You don’t know. You’ve been sub before, I know you have. You’re the one with the coin.”
I sighed. “A long fucking time ago, and I was never really submissive. You know exactly what I’m like, I was no different then. It was just a game.”
“I want to mean everything,” she whispered, and her fingers trailed my cheek. “If that’s not who you are, then it’s not who you are, but it’s what I need.”
“No compromise? Your way or the fucking highway? Is that it?” I scoffed. “Jesus Christ, do you have to be so… difficult?”
“I can’t be any other way,” she grinned. “It isn’t who I am.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Ok, then, Miss fucking Everything. Maybe if we both try we’ll meet somewhere in the middle, how about that for a novelty?”
She tilted her head from side to side. “Maybe.”
“Maybe?”
“I want what I want,” she said. “It’s up to you if you can give it to me.” She pushed me onto my back, and fell forwards with me, and her delicious mouth was on mine, her hands snaking down my chest. She sat upright, guiding my hands to her tits, and rocked there, like some kind of horny fucking cowgirl. “So, how about this middle ground?” she smiled. “I think it’s time you put your money where your mouth is, pretty boy.”
***
Chapter Eighteen
Faye
“I think it’s time to put your money where your mouth is, pretty boy.”
He tensed underneath me, his expression darkening, but I ground against his cock to disarm him. He groaned, and closed his eyes, and I hedged my bet that he was too horny to fight me.
“Please, Andy,” I whispered. “Please let’s try this.”
“Try what?” he asked.
“Trust me.” I ran my hands up his chest, enjoying the firmness. His nostrils flared at that.
“That’s just the thing,” he hissed. “I’m not sure whether I do. You’re too… unpredictable.”
“You like me that way,” I smiled. “It excites you. That’s one of the things you like best about me, that’s one of the things you’ve always liked best about me. Don’t think I don’t know it.”
“I like your passion and your spontaneity at work, Faye. I’m not sure it stretches to your deviant fucking plans for my asshole.”
Oh God, his filthy mouth, his cocky, snarky, arrogant fucking voice. Fuck, how I wanted this. The thought of him at my mercy had long driven me out of my mind. He could see it, I’m sure, his body tense and suspicious. I met his eyes, and the hunger in mine must have burned. “Please,” I said. “You have no idea how much I want you like this.”
“Like what?” he snapped, but there was a hint of resignation in it, the tiniest glimpse of surrender. “How do you want me, exactly?”
I dismounted and scurried up the bed, rearranging pillows that smelled like him. He rolled over and watched me with a brooding scowl, but he didn’t object. I arranged two pillows for his head and two further down, to where I’d need them. I patted the mattress. “I want you here,” I said. “On your back.”