Dirty Bad Savage(51)
“She’s really good. She knows what she’s talking about.”
“Dunno why she’s so bothered. Ain’t nothing much.”
“I don’t believe that, and neither does she.”
He shrugged, and I felt him prickle, awkward again. “What you got me here for, Soph?”
Nothing like a direct question. “I can enjoy your company, can’t I?”
“You mean sex?”
“No. Although I can enjoy that too, I hope.”
“That shit in the club. I liked it.” He stared at the darkness beyond the balcony windows. “Didn’t know if I would, but I did. I liked it there.”
“I hoped you would.”
“Why?”
“Jesus, Callum, isn’t it obvious?” I stroked Casey’s ears, looking into happy doggy eyes. “You really want me to say this? It’s late, I want bed, I want sex, I want to go to sleep with a sore pussy to go with my sore arse.”
“Just wanna know where we’re at.”
“We’re here. Doesn’t that say enough?”
“Maybe for you.”
I reached over to twist his fingers in mine. “Come to bed with me.”
A gentle squeeze as he downed his drink, then a shrug, conversation over. “Alright, Soph. Whatever you say.”
***
Callum
I’d never been in a bed before, not like that one. Sophie’s bed was fucking massive, a big fucking hulk of a thing, all fucking posh, with white sheets and too many fucking pillows. I felt dirty in it, even though I was clean. Well, clean for me, anyway. I stared up at the ceiling, feeling so fucking naked even under the covers. She’d stripped my clothes off me, all of them. Ditched them at the bottom of the bed and dragged me in with her like I was someone. Like I deserved to be here.
Someone like me don’t deserve this shit. Was born for the streets. Born for cold fucking nights and scrabbling for food. Fighting, and stealing and surviving best I can, not for this. Not for someone like her.
Casey was still whining her head off in the hallway, scratching at the door. I told her to quiet again, settle down like a good girl. She didn’t know what to do, bless her. Not her fault, neither. Still, I couldn’t have her in here, dirty paws all over Soph’s white sheets. Felt bad enough for dirtying them up myself.
Sophie edged closer, snaking a hand across my stomach. I rolled onto my side, awkward, getting as close as possible to the edge. She followed me, stalking me under the duvet like she was on a mission. I felt her breath against my back, her leg wrapped over mine. It felt so fucking nice.
“Comfy?” she asked, in a lazy voice.
“Aye.”
“You sure? You’re right on the edge.”
“Aye. I’m alright.”
“Night then, Callum.”
“Night.”
I closed my eyes, trying to drift off. Couldn’t stop thinking, though. Of Sophie, of Explicit, of Raven and Masque and all the things I’d seen. Couldn’t stop thinking of the Stoneys, either, and Vicki back home. Sophie’s breathing deepened, long exhalations on my skin. I listened to her sleeping, wishing I could follow, but the minutes ticked by and still fucking nothing. I was careful not to wake her when I got out of bed, lifting her arm so softly that she didn’t feel a thing.
I went to the window, pulled back the drapes to look at the city outside, but it weren’t a window, it was a door. I turned the key quietly, stepping outside as naked as the day I was born. The balcony was high, looking right over the Thames. It was a great view, London lights twinkling on the skyline. Not lights like East Veil, proper lights. Could see the London Eye from here, loads of other shit too. I leaned over, breathing in the river air. Breeze on my face felt good. How the other half fucking live, eh?
Soft footsteps padded out to me. Sophie’s warm arms around my waist. “Can’t sleep?”
“Sorry. Didn’t mean to wake ya.”
She kissed my shoulder, and it made me cringe, wanting her so fucking much it hurt. “Come back to bed.”
“Can’t sleep, Soph.”
“I’ll help you sleep.” She grabbed for my wrist, pulled me back inside, her hands all over me, over the tats on my chest. “Relax. It’s alright.”
“Why d’you want this?”
“Stop talking, Callum,” she whispered. “Stop questioning it.”
“Why d’you trust me here? I can’t even trust my fucking self.” I pulled away from her, hands in my hair, stomach in fucking knots as Casey whined away outside the door. “I fight, I steal, I hurt people. I eat from fucking bins, Soph, like a fucking sewer rat. I ain’t got no money, no fucking home, no nothing.”