“For letting me finally see my mate.” He released my face and let his hands move down my arms, and then the sides of my body. He kept his hands moving until they settled on my hips. “For letting me see how much I get to enjoy.”
He left tiny kisses all along my neck and down to my shoulder. “There are so many things I want to do with you. So many things I want to experience.”
I said nothing. Instead I closed my eyes. I was overwhelmed with such a mix of emotions I could barely breathe. His lips felt good, but they weren’t the lips I wanted on me. I knew in the deepest parts of me they’d never be. I was too in love with Gage to want another man.
“But I am a man of my word.” He moved his hands from my hips.
I opened my eyes.
“You only invited me in because you were hurt. I took advantage of that, but I’m not taking it further. It’s in your hands now.” He stepped back. “So what will it be, Mary Anne?”
I moved under the shower head again. Without Hunter touching me my body was cold. I wasn’t going to make it any easier for Hunter. Who was I kidding? Nothing was magically going to get better once I gave in.
“That’s what I thought.” He moved under another shower head and rinsed off. He reached for a bar of soap.
I tried not to watch, but I couldn’t help it. He finished up and crossed the shower again to stand next to me. He handed me the soap before leaning in and kissing me lightly. “I’ll be waiting for you in bed.”
“Okay.”
He walked out of the shower. “Take your time. There’s no rush.” He closed the bathroom door behind him.
I let out a deep breath. What was that? What had just happened? I’d invited Hunter in to shower with me, but he’d been the gentleman he always seemed to be and didn’t push it. I washed my hair and body before turning off the water and grabbing a towel.
I didn’t hear anything from the other room, but I knew I wasn’t going to be lucky enough to find him sleeping. I was going to have to face him after literally baring it all. It definitely wasn’t going to make the night any easier.
I toweled off my hair and slipped into the silky nightgown I assumed Jocelyn had left out for me. It felt smooth and cool against my skin. I waited another few moments before venturing into the dark bedroom. I slid into bed, knowing full well that Hunter was waiting on the other side.
“Hey.” He pulled me into his arms.
“Hi.” I stared up at the ceiling. “This is so awkward.”
“It doesn’t have to be.” He ran his hands over my arms. “It can just be a couple getting to know each other.” His hand moved to my waist and then back up. I kept thinking he was going to move it over to touch my breast, but he didn’t. I wasn’t sure I could handle him touching me. The shower hadn’t numbed me the way I’d hoped it would.
“So, were you right?”
“Right about what?” he whispered in my ear.
“Did my body match the dream?” I closed my eyes. I didn’t know what I wanted him to say. Would anything change if it didn’t? Would he realize I wasn’t meant to be his mate?
“Exactly…” He kissed my arm. “Although like everything else about it, you’re even better in person.”
“I can’t believe I did that.”
“Did what?”
“Invited you to shower with me.” There was something cathartic about saying what I wanted to say. I didn’t have the energy to hold back my thoughts and feelings anymore.
“It wasn’t much of an invitation. You were upset. I should probably be mad at myself for following you in, but I’m not. You’re going to be my mate. I needed to make sure you were all right.”
“You followed me in because you were checking on me?”
“Partially. You scare me sometimes, Firefly.”
“Why?” I tried to relax my body. I was so tense.
“Because you’re unhappy. I never want you unhappy.”
“Can you really blame me?”
“No. This whole situation is a mess, but it’s all going to work out. I only wish you remembered the dreams.”
“What makes you think I even had them?”
“I don’t know that for sure, but I wish you had. I don’t want to feel like I’m forcing myself on you. I want it to be the way it was. When you wanted me as much as I wanted you.” Hunter sounded more vulnerable than ever. How could a man be so frustratingly confident one minute, and so discouraged the next?
“And what if that never happens?”
“It will. When you’re my mate you’ll be happy, but I wish it could happen before.”