Jennifer didn’t like the answer but accepted it. Waddling over to the grill she asked, “Albert, could I have a BLT?”
“Anything for baby.” The man nodded and went to work.
Jennifer smiled. Since learning she was pregnant, the change in Albert could be called nothing but amazing. His constant flow of sweet potato fries and zucchini lasagna whenever Jennifer asked, and sometimes before she thought to, had been a godsend. Albert wasn’t the only one helping out. Mr. Thompson, the manager, never once gave her a hard time about taking off work for doctor appointments, something Jennifer had expected to have to fight for. Sally picked up extra shifts when needed and even helped her get signed up for a program to pay for medical care for low-income mothers. Even the customers seemed to handle her more gently.
The rounder Jennifer grew, the blurrier her mind became. One of her customers called it “baby fog” one day when she’d been describing it, and now it’d hit her at full force. Sometimes when a customer asked for a cup of coffee she’d bring them a piece of pie, instead. The customer would take one look at her enormous belly and then sit quietly and eat the pie.
Sally walked over to the counter where Jennifer waited for her sandwich. “Have you picked a family yet?”
The high counter had become the place where Jennifer spent most of her day. She loved the customers but had never quite gotten used to complete strangers feeling up her stomach. With the counter, many of them didn’t even know she was pregnant until she stepped around.
“No.” A button on her shirt popped out of place. It sat over her burgeoning belly button and kept coming out of the buttonhole. For the umpteenth time, she pushed it back into place.
“What happened to that nice couple from the Meadows?”
“I don’t know, I just didn’t feel comfortable with them.” She paused, but didn’t look Sally in the eye. “I feel so trapped right now. I’m not meeting any families I feel really comfortable with, and the baby will be here in just a few weeks.” Jennifer knew what Sally was about to say even before the words came out of her friend’s mouth. She braced for the answer.
“You could just keep the baby.”
And there it was again. “You know I can’t do that, I can’t afford a baby. I can’t bring a baby into my life. I haven’t made anything of myself, I work all the time—what kind of life is that for a child?”
“You could tell him.” Sally eyed Jennifer, her expression wide and hopeful. “I know you don’t believe me, but maybe the reason you’re having so much trouble finding a family for adoption is because you don’t really want to give it up.” She stood up straight and put her hands on her hips before she continued.
Jennifer recognized it as her “no nonsense” stance. She braced herself again.
“For that matter, if it weren’t for your stubborn pride, you could have told him months ago. You two could be busy bickering over boy and girl names by now.”
“I can’t do that,” Jennifer said simply. She gave up on the button. She’d have to tie the button and eyehole together next time and hope the string kept her somewhat modestly covered.
“Look, you tell him, and if he doesn’t want the baby, then no harm done. You move forward with your plans. If he does, then you two work out some kind of arrangement so he can help support you and the baby, and you can give up this adoption nonsense.”
“Sally! It’s not nonsense,” Jennifer said, her heart breaking. “Mark is no more capable of taking care of a child right now than I am. Just during the couple of days I spent with him, he almost never came home. He spends all his time at the hospital. What kind of father could he be if he’s never there? I lost my father when I was four. I know what it’s like to grow up without a dad. And I can’t help but notice how you’re conveniently leaving out Rebecca.”
Sally sat quietly for a moment and seemed to wait while Jennifer tried to regain her composure.
“BLT for baby.” Albert handed the sandwich through the window.
Taking the food, Jennifer gave Sally a silent pleading look.
Sally threw her hands in the air. “All right, we’ll stop for now. Let me get you some milk.”
A twinge settled into her right side as she set the plate down. Absently, she reached down and tried to rub the pain away. Arguing with Sally over things that couldn’t change left them both frustrated, and right now she didn’t have it in her to keep up the fight.
Her mind cleared momentarily and only one thought remained: she felt famished. She took the glass from Sally and sat on the stool behind the counter before taking an enormous bite. The bell over the door rang. Jennifer tried to swallow quickly. But all pretenses of swallowing flew out of her body as soon as she saw who walked through the door.