Go after her, King, she repeated. My mom had always had this notion I’d be king of the world. She just didn’t want me to be king of my dad’s world. She’d convinced me for years that I was the ruler of my destiny… King of it.
“I’m tired, Ma… of all of it.”
She stepped out of the dark corner of the room and into a beam of sunlight. She looked exactly as I remembered. She had long, dark, wavy hair, beautiful green eyes, and a smile that brightened everyone’s day. She reached out for me, and when I went to take her hand, she faded away. I was aware my mind was fucking with me.
If I could only decipher the jumble in my head, I’d have a folder for the real and the real fucked up. That’s what it came down to—a ton of figments of my imagination that really fucked with my view of reality.
Everything I remembered about my mother seemed to fade with time. Sometimes, I wondered if my recollection of her was all in my head. If I’d had this disease of the mind longer than I knew. Did I somehow conjure up all those good memories? It was really hard for me to believe that the woman who loved me so fiercely had left behind her first born son to be raised by her mother.
A grandmother she told me died years before I was born.
Meeting Alyssa Preston had been a surreal experience. It was like seeing what my mother would’ve looked like as an older woman. I was a total dick to her for years because I hated how she kept reminding Tyler that our mother had loved Damien and me more than him. It pissed me off that Mom had risked everything to save her dad and still they talked about her like she’d shamed them.
To her credit, Alyssa Preston had welcomed me into her family with no qualms, but I was too far detached to fully form the bond she wanted. There was so much I knew was left out of the reason my mom left her child behind, but anytime I broached the topic with Alyssa she shut down.
The animosity Tyler carried around for our mother made her a forbidden topic between us. On every other level we were even keel, but we had opposing opinions on the woman who birthed us. And for years Tyler resented the shit out of me for having her love. I was still baffled by how close we’d become.
I sighed as I sat at my desk wondering if Juliana would come back or if I’d be pathetic enough to chase her down. She didn’t know the power I extended to her. I tried not to show her how weak yet amazing I felt around her and ended up pushing her away.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Juliana
I used my key to let myself in. I’d spent the whole day downtown with Nicholas pretending I was aching to return to Devlin. Nicholas booked a hotel room, and when I told him I was going home, he protested, but in the end, I wasn’t willing to walk away.
Devlin waited midway down the stairway as I entered. He must have heard the taxi pull up. His hair was disheveled as if he’d spent the day running his fingers through it. He wore pajama bottoms that hung really low, his feet were bare, and his gaze was suspicious and wary. I dropped my bag to the floor and slowly moved forward.
“Hey.”
He crossed his arms. He was throwing up a barrier already. “Hey.”
I climbed a few steps. “I’m sorry.”
“For?” He lifted an eyebrow.
“Leaving?” I stopped one step beneath him and gazed up at him.
I reached out and took his hand. He watched as I laced our fingers together, and then I stepped up onto the same step he stood on.
“I’m sorry I let the asshole get to me,” he countered.
I shook my head, and even he smiled at his half-assed apology. I ran my hand up the rippled plane of his abs and pressed my lips to his.
“You promised you wouldn’t leave.” His disappointed words were a soft breath against my lips.
“I know. Technically, I went out for air, I didn’t leave.”
He frowned at me.
“What? It’s only been…” I glanced at my watch. “Thirteen hours.”
He scooped me up unexpectedly, and I giggled when he placed a kiss on my neck. “Felt like an eternity.”
He put me down and I followed him to the bedroom, where I removed my jewelry and changed into one of his t-shirts, since most of my things were in my bag in the foyer.
Devlin sat on his side of the bed scrolling through his phone. I pulled out my e-reader, but after less than ten minutes, I put it down and looked at him. The same thing kept bugging me, and until I put it out there, the uneasy feeling would grow.
“Do you know the Moretti family?”
His jaw clenched. I’d purposely watched for a reaction and had gotten one.
He glanced at me as he tilted his head and narrowed his eyes. “Why would you ask me that?”
“Just curious.”