The feeling of pleasure, pain and absolute desire had me bucking my hips and fucking his mouth with my pussy while my fingers gripped the base of his cock to keep him from coming at the same time. He slapped my ass in response before he grabbed the butt plug by the base and pounded my asshole with it several times as I rode out my orgasm.
"Get on your knees, bad girl."
I obeyed but my jelly-like limbs were slow to react as he pulled himself into a sitting position. I wanted him to take me from behind; it had become a favorite position of mine every since he introduced the butt plug to me in the Caribbean. There was something about being fucked by him while this silicone object lay lodged into my back passage, making the sex between us feel that much more satisfying. I swore no one made me come so hard in my life.
Max grabbed me by the waist while he sat, his back against the headboard, as he impaled me onto his cock and I moaned out loud. Using his knees for leverage, he pounded me hard and rough as he massaged my clit with his fingers. I wrapped my arms around his neck since I couldn't kiss him and my back lay against his chest.
He fucked me as if he was making love to me and that's exactly what it felt like. I wanted him to touch me everywhere as his hands snaked up my body and pinched my nipples as I worked my hips, forcing his cock as deep into me as it could go.
"Come all over my dick, babe. Fuckin' drench it with your pussy juices."
Those words were all it took for me to orgasm and clench my kegel muscles tight around his shaft. Max laughed in my ear and I couldn't help the slight annoyance. He'd delayed his own orgasm because he wanted me in another position when he decided to come.
It was pretty strange how through our sexual escapades, I'd learned more about the man than any of our other interactions. Not because we didn't talk-which we did, more often than not-but through sex, he could be himself completely. He was dirty, twisted, fucked up and perverted.
I wouldn't have wanted him any other way.
Max rearranged us until I was on my stomach and he was astride me though his length merely teased my ass instead of being inside of me. Once he lifted his weight from my body, I got on all fours. He crawled behind me and spanked my ass again.
One cheek; then the other; then both at the same time.
I turned toward him with a come hither expression and he took the opportunity to lean over me and devour my lips with his own. Our tongues immediately sought the other's out and we kissed hungrily and greedily for several moments. His hands gripped my waist once our mouths parted and he entered me slowly and deeply from behind.
His pace was torturous for someone who liked it rough but that was Max. Completely unpredictable and unafraid of experimentation when it came to sex-at least with me. I would do anything he wanted and surprisingly, he would do the same. We'd only had anal sex once but that was because I wanted him to fuck me there. It had been the most delicious kind of pain but he was too big and alas, after being with average-sized men in the dick department my whole life-Edward being the lone exception other than Max-it wouldn't ever be enjoyable. First, we had to train my ass to accept him, hence the inclusion of butt plugs in our sexual escapades.
He'd apply them and fuck me while one was up my ass and asked me if I truly enjoyed the invasion. There was a reason men liked anal-their prostate gland was massaged when they were fucked in the ass. Women, unfortunately, didn't have one and he wanted me to understand it was an acquired taste and certainly not for everyone. If I didn't enjoy it, he wouldn't care. He enjoyed fucking my mouth and pussy too much to put up a fuss. But I did want to find the activity pleasurable and therefore, I'd make a concerted effort to try.
I couldn't say it was one hundred percent enjoyable, not nearly as satisfying as his tongue or a couple of his fingers rammed up my ass while he fucked me but in time, it might become an activity I could eventually crave.
Max picked up the pace as his mouth kissed my shoulder blades and the heat of his body filled me with warmth. I was sore, my body felt deliciously fucked and I didn't want to have yet another orgasm but somehow, it happened anyway just after he came inside me. His fingers dipped into me and massaged my G-spot as his cum dripped out of me and it didn't take much for me to lose control again.
After our exhausting display of morning affection, I lay sated as he kissed my neck while his arms snaked around my waist, pulling me close to him.
"You have no reason to be nervous about tonight. Everything is going to be fine," Max said in a low voice.
"I'm not-at least not right now," I replied quietly. "I'm nervous about this-us. I'm still not on anything and yet . . . I haven't gotten pregnant. Maybe I can't, Max."
He kissed my forehead. "If you can't then it's all right, honey. A woman is not defined by how many children she can or can't have. Like we talked about, I'm not even sure I want any but if it happens, I wouldn't be upset either. Maybe because you're stressin' about it is the very reason why you can't get pregnant in the first place."
"I don't want you to think I'm broken or merely used goods. It's the same with Angelo when I meet him tonight. I fear he might not want me in his life and that would be the worst form of betrayal. Surely you can understand that."
His arms held me closer before he kissed the side of my head. "Of course but at the same time, you can't keep doing this to yourself or to us. Your past not only defines you but it's part of the reason you are the person you've become. Does that make you tainted or imperfect? No, not at all. You're the woman I want to be with regardless what has happened to you.
"I knew it from the moment we met. I truly don't care about Brad and Nel sticking their cocks inside you or your mouth-except for how it has affected you, psychologically speaking. Are they disgusting men? Yes, but you're physically healthy. It's time to stop holding on to all this blame you carry around like a goddamn security blanket. There is absolutely nothing you did to cause all the shit that has happened to you. I swear to you. Nothing you did caused your parents to be murdered. Dimitri is responsible for everything."
I nodded and smiled for his sake but nothing was as simple as just letting go. If it was, I would have done that a long time before now. I wouldn't be in the same place I found myself to be in at that moment and it sucked.
Only time would tell if I'd ever be able to forgive myself, even if I hadn't done anything wrong and had absolutely nothing to feel guilty about.
That was the problem with emotions; once you started feeling them, they were like the goddamn levies that'd broken and damn near destroyed this city. They flooded you, beat you down and left a messy trail of death and destruction in its wake. But if a city could slowly be rebuilt, couldn't I use that same philosophy with my psyche, and rebuild my life again?
I refused to believe I was anything less than someone who could be redeemed and absolved for my past sins. However, no one could forgive me if I didn't forgive myself first.
That was the hard part.
Maxwell
The day flew by and before Max knew it, the time had come.
Both he and Mags dressed to the nines because Gautreau's wasn't a "t-shirt and jeans" type of restaurant. He couldn't deny his own excitement with what had finally transpired and for him, the meet was way overdue.
He knew Mags was extremely nervous but at the same time, this was something that had to happen. In a way, their life-although it'd just begun-had come full circle. They'd united under the guise they would assassinate Angelo Abandonato but the man would actually be the driving force that would keep them both safe.
Max knew he could take on Dimitri. He'd spent every waking moment in the man's presence since he'd married his mother. He innately understood him and the reasoning behind his actions. However, just because he comprehended why the man acted the way he did no longer meant he had to make excuses for him or condone his behavior. If Dimitri was a player across from him in a Chess game, he knew the next move he would make.
Unfortunately, taking on Dimitri involved taking on the whole Koslakov Mafia and Max happened to be only one person. Were their soldiers he could count on? Maybe but none he would trust with his life or that of his fiancée. The risk was too great. They only had one person they could turn to and in this case, they were safer with him because he was Mags' blood.
Angelo and Magnolia had a stronger bond than she could comprehend at this point because Sophia was her mother, and by default, she belonged to Angelo's favorite relative. He loved her with all his heart and would have done anything to protect her.
Angelo had not taken Sophia's death lightly and for a while, he'd gone on a murderous tirade, killing enemies of his family left and right. He'd made the fictitious Michael Corleone seem like an ordinary decent criminal, and resembled a reincarnated version of Casino's Nicky Santoro.