We’d spent almost every waking minute together since his resignation. It was perhaps unhealthy, but I reasoned that we were trying to fit in every last moment we could before he left for the UK.
Today.
This was the last time I would see him, touch him, or hear his tortured, pleasured groan in my ear for six long months.
We were ready. In theory, at least. We were ready for the trials of a long-distance relationship. After discussing the situation with Nisha, we’d agreed that it would be best for my work with Dalton Cam Girls to come to an end. It had left me homeless… Until Jordan had suggested that I move into his house while he was gone.
His argument was that he was going to rent it out anyway. We spent an hour arguing over what I would pay him, and I finally won. I’d pay the mortgage and that was it. I was thankful I had more than enough in my savings.
“Jesus, Darcy,” he murmured in my ear, holding me tight. “I’m gonna miss you.”
I squeezed my eyes shut. “I’m going to miss you, too.”
He pulled back and kissed me in a way that proved his words. Then he got up and checked the time. I didn’t want to look—call me crazy, but every minute that ticked by was a minute closer to when he’d go.
I sat up and hugged my knees to my chest as a towel came flying through the door and landed on my head. I laughed as I pulled it off and cleaned myself. He was such an idiot.
The time to leave came all too quickly.
It was like time had skipped forward an hour, and the next thing I knew, I was in my car, driving him to the airport. The radio cut intermittently, only adding to the sombre mood in the car. Even though he kept a tight grip on my hand the whole way there, I couldn’t stop the rolling of my stomach.
He’d become such a huge part of my life that it didn’t seem right for him to be leaving so soon. Although I knew in my rational mind that he would still be a part of my life and we’d talk every day, I would miss the way he cupped my face when he needed me to listen and the way his laugh would make the hair on the back of my neck stand on end. I’d miss the way he ran his fingers up and down my spine in the morning to wake me up and the way he controlled my body and my pleasure so expertly.
I’d miss every single thing about him.
I pulled up in the parking lot and stopped. Jordan squeezed my hand and looked over at me.#p#分页标题#e#
“It’s only six months,” he said.
“I’m sure you’re trying to be reassuring, but it isn’t helping.” I offered him a small smile.
He pressed his lips to my knuckles. “Come on, sweet thing. Let’s get goodbye over and done with. Rip it off like a Band-Aid.”
“Okay.” My smile dropped as I got out of the car.
The wind whipped my hair around my face, and I fought it back behind my ears as he pulled two giant suitcases out of my trunk. He wheeled both of them through the lot and toward the building.
I trailed behind him, feeling sick to my stomach. Ultimately, I knew that this was for the best. We could be together without being together, and his not being in Chicago was a smart idea. I just hated that it was going to be for so long.
When he returned, I would have graduated.
That was a scary idea.
I waited with him as he checked his bags. It seemed like it took forever, and when we finally reached security, he turned to me.
“I’ll e-mail you when I get there,” he reassured me, taking me into his arms. “The moment I land.”
“I got it,” I whispered, holding him tight. “We’ll be okay.”
“We will be.” He kissed me firmly, his lips so warm against mine. “Gonna miss you, sweet thing.”
“I’m gonna miss you, too.” I held back the emotion threatening to escape as he kissed me a second time.
I held on to the kiss like it was my lifeline. Committed every sensation to memory for when I was alone in the dark and missed him. Every part of him embedded itself into my senses, and I gripped on to it so tightly that, if feelings had been real, I’d have snapped them.
He released me too soon and grabbed his bag. He walked backwards to security, his hand in the air, his bright eyes shining. Our whole relationship flashed in front of my eyes, from the day I’d walked into his classroom, to all of our—at the time, unknown to me—online interactions, to that day and every one since.
I couldn’t say that this had been easy.
I watched as he moved through security. The lump in my throat was heavy, totally lodged in there. I took all of my strength not to cry as he came out the other side of security and disappeared into departures.
Only when I was sure he was gone did I turn around and walk out to my car. I didn’t care as the cold winter air smacked me in the face or as the first tiny snowflakes fell from the ground. I barricaded myself in my car and squeezed my eyes closed.