Another fifteen minutes passed. Then thirty. By the time I heard Savannah’s car pulling into the lot, my jaw was tight and I was grinding my teeth. At a quarter past three, she pushed open the door. She was all smiles, as if nothing were wrong.
“Hey, John,” she called out. She went to the table and started unloading her backpack. “Sorry I was late, but after my class, a student came up to tell me that she loved my class, and because of me, she wanted to major in special education. Can you believe that? She wanted advice on what to do, what classes to take, what teachers were the best . . . and the way she listened to my answers . . .” Savannah shook her head. “It was . . . so rewarding. The way this girl was hanging on everything I was saying . . . well, it just makes me feel like I was really making a difference to someone. You hear professors talk about experiences like that, but I never imagined that it would happen to me.”
I forced a smile, and she took it as a cue to go on.
“Anyway, she asked if I had some time to really discuss it, and even though I told her I only had a few minutes, one thing led to another and we ended up going to lunch. She’s really something—only seventeen, but she graduated a year early from high school. She passed a bunch of AP exams, so she’s already a sophomore, and she’s going to summer school so she can get even further ahead. You have to admire her.”
She wanted an echo of her enthusiasm, but I couldn’t muster it.
“She sounds great,” I said instead.
At my answer, Savannah seemed to really look at me for the first time, and I made no effort to hide my feelings.
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
“Nothing,” I lied.
She set her backpack aside with a disgusted sigh. “You don’t want to talk about it? Fine. But you should know that it’s getting a little tiring.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
She whirled toward me. “This! The way you’re acting,” she said. “You’re not that hard to read, John. You’re angry, but you don’t want to tell me why.”
I hesitated, feeling defensive. When I finally spoke, I forced myself to keep my voice steady. “Okay,” I said, “I thought you’d be home hours ago. . . .”
She threw up her hands. “That’s what this is about? I explained that. Believe it or not, I have responsibilities now. And if I’m not mistaken, I apologized for being late as soon as I walked in the door.”
“I know, but . . .”
“But what? My apology wasn’t good enough?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“Then what is it?”
When I couldn’t find the words, she put her hands on her hips. “You want to know what I think? You’re still mad about last night. But let me guess—you don’t want to talk about that either, right?”
I closed my eyes. “Last night, you—”
“Me?” she broke in, and began shaking her head. “Oh no—don’t blame me for this! I didn’t do anything wrong. I wasn’t the one who started this! Last night could have been fun—would have been fun—but you had to sit around acting as if you wanted to shoot someone.”
She was exaggerating. Or then again, maybe she wasn’t. Either way, I kept quiet.
She went on. “Do you know that I had to make excuses for you today? And how that made me feel? Here I was, singing your praises all year long, telling my friends what a nice guy you were, how mature you were, how proud I am of the job you’re doing. And they ended up seeing a side of you that even I’ve never seen before. You were just . . . rude.”
“Did you ever think that I might have been acting that way because I didn’t want to be there?”
That stopped her, but only for an instant. She crossed her arms. “Maybe the way you acted last night was the reason I was late today.”
Her statement caught me off guard. I hadn’t considered that, but that wasn’t the point.
“I’m sorry about last night—”
“You should be!” she cried, cutting me off again. “Those are my friends!”
“I know they’re your friends!” I snapped, pushing myself up from the couch. “We’ve been with them all week!”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Just what I said. Maybe I wanted to be alone with you. Did you ever think of that?”
“You want to be alone with me?” she demanded. “Well, let me tell you, you’re sure not acting like it. We were alone this morning. We were alone when I walked in the door just now. We were alone when I tried to be nice and put this all behind us, but all you wanted to do is fight.”