Davina (Davy Harwood #3)(45)
His jaw hardened. “Did the Healers go out?”
She nodded, her head bowed to the ground. “Their essence was last sensed at the river. It is believed they died there.”
That meant . . . He frowned, distracted for a moment by Jiyama’s actions. She was acting like a demure little girl. He ground his teeth against each other before asking, “Why are you acting like this?”
She stiffened and her hands tucked under her long sleeves. “I feel . . . remorse . . . I think.”
“You think?”
She lifted her head then, and a pained expression was there. Her gaze trailed to Kates before she said, softly, “I’ve only felt wonder. I’ve wondered about life, about who Davy was, about the magic inside of her, about the world beyond these lands, about life as a human, but I have never felt this sensation inside of me.” Her hand, fisted around her sleeve, lifted and pressed between her breasts. She kept it clutched tight to herself. “I have never wondered about the side of life, about right versus wrong, but this—” her hand left her chest and indicated Kates, who hadn’t moved or made a sound. “I feel almost like crying. I’ve never experienced that emotion.” She lifted haunted eyes to Lucan, her bottom lip falling open. “Why is that?”
Anger filled him, but he bit back a curse and moved to the vampiress. Cupping the side of her face, he made sure his tone was soft as well. “That just means you are evolving. That is all.”
Her eyes traced back to Kates. “I feel a pit in my stomach. I have only felt the fullness of blood in there.” Her eyebrows pinched together. “I do not like this emotion.”
“It’s because you’ve spent too much time near humans.”
A brightness filled her eyes. She asked him, “It’s because of them?”
He nodded, leaning forward to brush his lips over her forehead. “Yes. Right and wrong, guilt and sadness, those are all human emotions. You’ve spent too much time near them with Davy before and now this one.” He moved, adjusting her so his back was to Kates. He was blocking Jiyama from looking at her, and he pressed another gentle kiss to the Mori vampire. “They are a unique species, wracked with silly emotions. It’s like a cancer to them, one that they don’t realize is something to be expunged. They almost worship these sensations.”
Her hand lifted up and grabbed onto his arms. “They do?” She was pressing her forehead tight to his lips. Her entire body was against his.
“They do. I didn’t realize their ‘humanity’ could infect you.”
“Humanity?”
“Hmm mmm.” He nodded, clasping her to him still. “It’s their sickness. I’m plagued with it too, but once I have The Immortal thread in me, I won’t suffer from it anymore.”
“You think Davy suffers this same sickness?” She pulled back, leaving enough space to look up at him.
Lucan paused, sensing there was more to her question other than curiosity. He frowned slightly, still holding her head in his hands. After a few beats, he asked, almost gruffly, “Why do you ask?”
Her hand fell to his chest, and she stepped to the side to see Kates again. “Davy said they were friends. If she is sick as well, I can’t imagine what she would feel knowing what we have done to this human.”
His frown deepened. “Why are you saying this, Jiyama?”
She stepped completely away from him. Her hands fell from his chest and balled into fists around her long sleeves once more. “The Immortal was good. I knew that as soon as I touched her. I don’t know what this ‘sickness’ is that you’re talking about, but it was different for Davy. I remember that. She was like honeyed blood. She was alluring to me. I had to go back and experience her again, but it wasn’t her blood I wanted.” A stricken wonder entered her gaze. “I wanted to give her my magic. I wanted to help her, and I haven’t been able to get that out of my head. I keep thinking about our time with this one.” She stepped forward and touched the table near Kates’s leg. “I don’t think she would be happy with what we did. She cared about this one. I knew that when I touched her. Lucan,” she looked back to him. “I don’t think we should have done what we did.”
“No, Jiyama.” He shook his head and moved once more so he was between her and the table. His hands lifted to her head again and he cupped her cheeks. “You’re sick. That’s all this is.”
“I don’t understand the sickness, but I remember how I felt when I helped The Immortal—”
He cut her off, saying, “And that will be me soon. I will become The Immortal. Remember? You will be helping me again. You can experience the same feeling with me, too.”