“That makes sense. A lot of the things they had us doing involved Homeland Security.”
“Also explains why they moved you out of cybercrimes afterward.”
I reached up to touch my forehead, but my arm was strapped to a board. Ash reached over and brushed the hair from my face.
“You were a little combative when the fever was high. They had to strap your arm to keep you from pulling the IV out.”
“What else happened while I was out of it?”
Ash just shook his head. “It’s been a tense few days is all.”
I didn’t believe him. There was tension in his eyes that hadn’t been there before.
“Did they see something on their tests? Is there something wrong with me?”
Ash started to shake his head, but he knew me well enough that I would see right through a lie.
“The infection might have caused more damage. They won’t know for sure until it passes and they can do more MRIs.”
“Fuck me! You’re joking, right?”
“I’m sorry, David.”
“So I went through all of this for nothing?”
“Not necessarily. The inflammation will take time to go down.”
“But it’s possible?”
Ash looked away so that I couldn’t see the expression on his face.
“Don’t lie to me, brother!” I grabbed the bed rail with my free hand and pulled myself up, not realizing that I also bent my knee and used my foot to give myself some leverage.
Ash stared at my leg.
“Tell me the truth. How much damage?”
And then he started to laugh.
Chapter 36
Ricki
“There’s atrophy, as we’d known there would be,” the doctor continued, his voice such a monotone that I wanted to ring his neck and tell him to speak with a little more enthusiasm. David moved his leg for the first time in two and a half years. That had to be good news.
“You’ll need physical therapy, but the extent of your movement thus far is very encouraging.”
David laughed. “I’d say it’s more than encouraging. It’s a miracle!”
He reached for my hand and I gave it, my heart shattering in my chest each and every time he smiled at me, each time he touched me, each time he simply said my name.
“When can he go home?” Ash asked.
“The end of the week,” the doctor said. Then he patted David’s foot. “Congratulations.”
The doctor left the room, followed by the nurse who dropped a wink in Ash’s direction before disappearing out the door. Ash looked at David, the grin on his face remarkable.
“Leave it to you to beat all the odds.”
David grinned. “I told you I’d be okay.”
Ash started to argue, then he just shook his head. “I’m gonna go home and shower. I need to refortify myself before another full day of your crowing.”
Ash touched my shoulder then walked away, letting the door close silently behind him.
I pulled my hand from David’s even as he tried to tug me closer to him. I sat in the chair we’d all been using, running my fingers through my hair as I did.
“What’s the matter?” David asked.
“You. You’re insufferable.”
“And you love me for it.”
“I do love you,” I said softly, almost too softly for him to hear. But he did. I could see it in the light that suddenly flooded his eyes.
“Hey, love,” he said, reaching his hand out to me, “I love you, too.”
“You did this behind my back.”
He frowned. “I did this for you.”
“You could have died, and I wouldn’t have been here.”
“Ricki, I—”
“I can’t keep playing these games with you, David. I love you, but I can’t keep up with the secrets; I can’t keep wondering when you’re next going to shut me out of something this important.”
“I didn’t tell anyone. I wanted to do it before I changed my mind.”
“But you don’t get it. You could have died and I wouldn’t have been here. I can’t do that; I can’t not be here.”
His face darkened, fear dancing in his eyes. But he didn’t say anything.
I brushed a tear away. “You didn’t even ask me if this was something I wanted. It never crossed your mind that I might not want you to walk again.”
It sounded horrible when I said it out loud. But it was the truth. It was how I felt.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“Sorry’s not enough.”
I stood and studied him for a long minute. “I wish you all the happiness in the world,” I said slowly. But I can’t….”
“Please, Ricki. Don’t go.”
I just shook my head. I had to go before I changed my mind, before he convinced me to stay.