“It was just a thought.”
Sienna pregnant. Rachel couldn’t imagine it. Not with David. But of course they were having sex, and once you were doing it, there was always a risk.
She had learned that the hard way. Not that she regretted having Josh.
“You’re right,” she said slowly. “They could have an unexpected pregnancy.”
“Dammit, Rachel.” His voice was low, but forceful.
She looked at him. “What?”
“It’s not your fault we had Josh before we’d planned. We were both in the bed, making love.”
She glanced toward the family room, then back at him. “I know. But if I hadn’t forgotten my birth control pills, it wouldn’t have happened.”
“Would you give up Josh if you could?”
“Of course not.” She sipped her wine. “How did you know what I was thinking?”
“I know you.”
Something that was both a blessing and a curse, she thought.
“Speaking of Josh,” he said. “He’s getting to the age where he needs to have chores and start earning an allowance.”
“Probably a good idea,” she admitted. “What do you think he should do around the house?”
Greg gave her an easy smile that, had she been standing, would have made her knees go weak. “You’re the one who’s taking care of him on a day-to-day basis. What drives you crazy the most?”
That was easy. “His bathroom. It’s always a mess. He leaves towels everywhere. He doesn’t wipe out the sink. I bought him some of that spray you use after every shower to keep the tiles clean, but he won’t do it.”
Greg got up and opened the junk drawer. He pulled out a pad of paper and a pen and returned to the table. “All right. Bathroom it is. What does he need to do on a daily basis versus a weekly basis?”
Thirty minutes later dinner was done, they were on their second glass of wine and they had a chore list for their son. From the family room came sounds of the baseball game.
“I’ll put together a chart,” Greg offered. “One we can put on the refrigerator. If he does everything he’s supposed to for the entire week, he gets a bonus.”
“I like that idea and I’m thrilled at the thought of not nagging him to pick up his towels every day.”
“He’s a capable kid. He can help.”
She supposed that was true—it was just she’d never thought to ask. She’d always done everything.
“What about his summer camp?” Greg asked. “When does that start?”
“The Monday after school’s out. He’s signed up for science mornings and sports afternoons.”
He typed the information into his phone. “Great. I’ll get you my schedule and we’ll figure out when I’m off and can take him there and back.” He grinned. “Hell, I’ll even make him lunch.”
“Do you know how?”
He laughed. “I can figure it out. If I have any questions, Josh will talk me through it.”
“Why are you doing this?”
He leaned across the table and lightly touched her hand. “He’s my son, too. I should have been doing this all along.”
His touch was distracting. She’d always liked the feel of Greg’s body next to hers. She’d enjoyed everything they did together. She’d heard other women talk about how they hated their exes or were indifferent to them. She couldn’t imagine being indifferent to Greg. No matter what. Probably the reason she hadn’t dated since the divorce. What was the point? No man could do to her what he did.
“I wish you’d expected more of me.”
His statement brought her back to the conversation. “I did expect more. You weren’t willing to do it.”
He straightened and dropped his hand to his lap. “You mean you asked once, I didn’t bother and that was it.”
She pressed her lips together. “I can’t tell if you’re blaming me or yourself.”
“I’m blaming both of us, but mostly me. I know I’ve said it before, but I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I was willing to marry you but I wasn’t willing to be a good husband. I loved you, Rachel, and I wanted us to be together, but I wasn’t ready for the responsibilities of being married.” He frowned. “I didn’t want other women, just a little freedom. Which put the burden of everything on you.”
She didn’t know what to say to that. “Okay,” she murmured.
“What I can’t figure out,” he continued, “is how much of what went wrong was because of me not being willing to be a grown-up and how much of it was you needing to be a martyr?” He looked at her. “Don’t worry. I’m not expecting an answer.”