'You're kidding me.'
'I've seen cases of alcoholic poisoning in dogs,' she told him. 'The stupidity of owners sometimes defies belief. Jake, why are you here?' And then as he didn't answer straightaway, she jumped in for him. 'Is there a problem at the lodge?'
'There's no problem.'
'Do you need to sign papers for sale or something? Rob tells me the farmhouse had been cleaned up and is looking great.'
'That's what I'd like to talk to you about.'
'It is?'
'It is,' he said. 'So about that five minutes … '
'You've already had it,' she said, but she couldn't get her voice to work properly again. She was sounding breathless.
She was feeling breathless.
'Nope,' he said. 'The five-minute date has to start at a designated place. The first date was in a booth in the Combadeen Hall. Our second date has to be somewhere else. I have a rental car outside. Can I take you to my designated date spot?'
'Your designated date spot,' she said, faintly.
'It's not so far.'
'I need to collect the dogs.'
'I dropped in on Glenda and Doreen,' he said, and at the look on her face he grinned. 'I had to do something. I landed five hours ago-I made a beeline for you, only to be told you were in surgery and weren't expected out until now. Unlike Manhattan Central, there's a dearth of people to talk to. Even Paul and Ida had taken themselves off to stay with their daughter, and Horse & Hound circa 1997 has a limited appeal. So I've heard all about how Glenda's hand is now behaving beautifully and how well Doreen is. I've been slobbered on by one vast golden retriever-what are you feeding her by the way? I thought she was supposed to be a runt. Oh, and I've bought Bitsy.'
'You've bought Bitsy.' She was suddenly feeling faint.
'I wanted him,' Jake said. 'I've wanted him for months. Like some other things I've wanted. I've been telling myself I was stupid, but a man can only do that for so long before he starts believing it and starts to act stupid. So I've been to see the breeder, and yes, she kept him for herself, but money talks, and I can pick him up as soon as I'm ready. There're just a couple of things I need to sort first.' He hesitated. 'No. There's only one thing. One really important thing. Five minutes, Tori. Will you come with me and listen?'
'I don't think … '
'No, don't think,' he said. 'Thinking does your head in. I've been thinking and thinking and it's doing me no good at all. And finally … you know what? I stopped thinking and I'm letting my heart decide.'
They drove in silence, past the lodge, through the burned-out state forest and up onto the ridge.
The year had been kind, with above average rainfall and gentle weather, and the Australian bush had regenerated as only the Australian bush can. Burned trees had new shoots spurting manically out of blackened trunks. Grasses and ferns had pushed up through the ashes. It still looked dreadfully scarred; there were places where the heat had been so intense that it'd take years to come back, but it was no longer grey.
And rebuilding had begun in earnest. Every second house site had been cleared of debris and was now a half-built home. With the kinder weather many families had brought caravans up to the ridge so they could live close to where they were rebuilding.
There were birds back as well, and as they drove there were wallabies feeding on the roadside. As dusk settled Tori could almost imagine the fire had never been.
But it had. Her life would never be the same.
If the fire hadn't happened … she wouldn't have met Jake. She wouldn't be pregnant-and her hand touched her tummy as it did a hundred times a day.
'Thank you for sending me the ultrasound pictures,' Jake said gravely, and she thought he must have seen the movement. Self-consciously she linked her hands onto her knees and stared straight ahead.
She would not think about why he was here, she decided. She would not.
She would not allow herself to hope.
'Did you like them?' she asked. 'I carry mine in my purse.'
'I carry mine in my wallet,' he said, and she gasped.
'You're joking.'
'My kid,' he said gravely. 'My wallet.' He smiled. 'By the way, I checked every picture and not one of them's taken from the right angle. Do we know if we have a daughter or a son?'
We. The tiny word was enough to make her breathless all over again. She had to fight to make herself speak.
'I didn't want to know,' she managed at last. 'I like surprises.'
'Like me coming?'
'I'm not sure what to think about you coming.'
'Don't think,' he said again. 'Just feel. It's the only safe way.'
There was nothing she could say to that, so she sat in silence until they pulled up at their destination. Which was his farmhouse-her former wildlife shelter-only it was very different from when she'd left it.
As a child she remembered this place looking beautiful, when the doctor and his wife had loved it. But it had only ever been a weekend retreat for them. Jake's father been on call all the time, and he'd lived in Combadeen, so maybe it had been shabby even then.
Now it was anything but shabby. It was a magnificent homestead, its weatherboards gleaming with fresh white paint, its gracious verandah running the full circle of the house, the ancient river-gum timbers of the decking rubbed and oiled back to their original glory.
Someone had worked in the garden. There were so many roses that possums could come and share, she thought, and there'd still be enough to go around.
The French windows were cleaned and gleaming. Some of them were open, and there were soft white drapes floating out in the warm evening breeze.
It looked … like home, she thought, stunned, as Jake helped her out of the car. She didn't need help but she was so dazed she accepted it anyway and she didn't object as he led her into the house and took her from room to room without saying a word.
Why was she here? Why was he here?
It was so beautiful.
It wasn't furnished yet. The rooms were bare. The place was a home waiting for its people. Dogs, she thought suddenly, and kids, and her hand touched her tummy again before she could help herself.
'There's something else you need to see before I explain myself,' Jake said softly, and she opened her mouth to argue-or ask, or something-but she couldn't think what to argue or ask or something so she closed it again. He took her hand and led her and she let herself be led.
Out of the house. Back to the car, then along the track, and into the first driveway on the left.
Home. Or home as she'd once known it. Now it was a mass of regenerating bushland. All that was left was the chimney. The hearth, the fireplace, the heart of the home for her parents' lives, for her grandparents' lives, stretching far, far back …
Now the scene for grief and destruction.
Only she wasn't feeling grief now, or not so much. It was tempered by this new little life inside her. It was tempered by her dogs, her new job, her new life.
It was tempered by Jake's hand.
Once again he was helping her out of the car. He was leading her along the path to where the house had once been, then stopping by the ancient lemon tree that had somehow miraculously survived. Its singed branches had regenerated, and amazingly it was loaded with lemons. The sight actually made her smile.
A massive gum had fallen right in front of it. The team of men who'd cleared the place had taken away the smaller litter but they'd chopped the log into three, obviously thinking she might want to use it. For landscaping or something.
She couldn't think of using anything here.
But Jake had brought along a rug. He spread it across the log so any soot was covered and he propelled her gently downwards.
'Sit,' he said, and she sat because she was beyond arguing.
Then, 'I've done all I can without your input,' he told her. 'It's time I brought you onboard.'
'Onboard?'
'Onto my sea of plans,' he said. 'I have three directions I can go, and I don't know which one to take.'
'I don't understand.'
'Okay,'he said gently and he sat down beside her. He took her hand in his and held it, like it was truly precious. 'First things first. I've come home.'
How was a girl to respond to that? She couldn't.
'I was born here,' he said, taking no obvious offence at her silence, but ploughing on regardless. 'I suspect I was conceived in the house over there. As you were conceived here. They say there's a strong chance you end up marrying the girl next door. How about that?'
Whoa! She should say something, she thought. But what? What?
'But I'm getting ahead of myself,' he said, smiling. It was a teasing smile. It was the smile she loved with all her heart.
'I've quit my job,' he told her. 'For the past two months I've been undertaking intensive post-graduate training in pain management. There's more to learn, but instead of being an anaesthetist who's good at managing pain, what I've decided to do is to become a pain management specialist. I need more training still, but I can learn it on the job, and I can learn it here. I can be useful now. I can be useful here.'
And then, as surprise did give her something to say, he pressured her hand, telling her there was more to come, that for now he simply needed her to listen.