'You're beautiful,' he said, and it was totally inadequate.
'My undies are beautiful,' she corrected him, and he tilted her chin and gazed straight into her eyes and he shook his head.
'You're beautiful,' he repeated, so strongly she had to believe him. 'But this … Are you sure? Tori, I want you tonight, I want you more than I've ever wanted anything in this lifetime. But I do need to go back to the States … '
'Your medicine's in the States,' she whispered, and she met his gaze directly, clear and true. Knowing, as he did, that this was far too soon for any decision to be made as to a future. 'This is no five-minute date, Jake, but neither is it any kind of commitment. This is seduction, need, call it what you will, but it's for tonight. It's your need and mine, for tonight and tonight only.
'I trust you,' she said steadily-and she knew she was right. For this night, trust had returned with a vengeance. She thought suddenly of Jake's father, of the elderly doctor she'd known and loved, and she knew that no matter how little he'd known him, Jake truly was his son.
Jake … A stranger, yet not.
Here, now, he was hers.
'I'm as sure as anything I've ever known,' she whispered. 'My body wants you. I want you.' And she fumbled with the catch to her bra.
But he was before her, unfastening the clasp, then cupping her breasts, caressing, holding, teasing her nipples, sending fire surging through her body, blocking out all else.
This was so right. This was … now.
Crazy but right. Stupid but wonderful.
Perfect for now.
Her body was on fire.
Not crazy. Not stupid.
Perfect.
He was touching each nipple in turn with his lips, reverent, wondering, and she arched back, hot with want. It felt so good, so wonderful, to be lifted out of the past six months, to feel the grey fading away like some forgotten nightmare.
Her body was surging to his touch, a bud unfurling in a blast of heat, coming to life in ways she'd never felt before.
Jake.
She should be embarrassed. She should at least be a little self-conscious.
She felt nothing but right. His gaze told her she was beautiful and for tonight she believed that message absolutely.
'I believe things are a little unequal,' she managed, and somehow she unfastened his shirt, button by button, a slow, inexorable path of exploration, while he kissed her lips, her breasts, the nape of her neck, trailing kisses downwards while she tried to concentrate on undressing him. His shirt was gone, his belt, his chinos, and then, finally, he was kicking them aside and all his clothes had disappeared. Her skin met his as he tugged her close, closer, her body curved into his and fell onto the bed of soft, lush grass.
They gasped as one as the coolness of the grass met their bodies. They were clinging to each other for warmth, for heat, waiting for the loving to take over and for the cool of the night to disappear.
As it did. As it must.
She wanted him. She ached for him as he kissed her, deeply, searchingly, wonderfully, as his fingers explored every contour of her body, as her breasts moulded to him, as their heartbeats synchronised.
She wanted him, wanted him, wanted him …
Skin against skin, full-length, she had him all. He was hers.
She was riding his body, mounting him, holding him hard under her. She was aching, aching.
'Tori,' he whispered, and then he groaned and then there was no space for words at all. For finally, searingly, wondrously, he was a part of her. His rhythm was her rhythm, his body was her body-skin merging into skin, body merging into body, and the night was dissolving in a haze of heat and want and pure, wondrous delight.
She loved. For tonight, she even trusted. For tonight, this was her man.
CHAPTER SIX
S OMEWHERE towards dawn they made their way back to the lodge. Jake drove. Tori sort of … wafted. She felt beautiful. She felt cherished. More.
She felt as if her world had transformed-like the grey had shifted and the sun was shining through. It marked an end of the dreariness, she thought, and as Jake refused to let her walk but carried her from the car to the house-and that meant carrying Rusty as well because she wasn't letting him go-she felt as if she'd moved to another life.
The dawn was beginning to glimmer over the mountains. When the household woke, life would begin again.
Life on the other side …
'You're smiling like the cat that got the cream,' he murmured, as he climbed the verandah steps and her smile broadened.
'I believe I am. I believe I did.'
'Tori … '
'No.' She reached up and touched his lips. 'Not a word. Nothing. That was just … perfect. It woke me up. It was like life started again. I don't know if you can understand … '
'All I understand is that you're beautiful. Can I carry you to my bedroom?'
'No,' she whispered. 'I don't want to wake up beside you.'
Something shuttered in his face-an expression she didn't like. Pain? No. It was a closing of something that had barely started to open.
'Jake, no,' she said, swiftly-she did not want to hurt this man but this was important. She was struggling to explain it, struggling to understand it herself, but somehow she had to find words for what she was feeling. 'What happened tonight was magic, time out of frame. I needed it so much-I needed you-and I'll be grateful for the rest of my life. But if I wake up beside you in the morning … '
'It is morning.'
'You know what I mean. If I wake up beside you, then I might hold and cling. I might even get needy. I don't want that. I don't want anything to mess with what we had tonight.'
I don't want to fall in love.
Where had that come from? No matter, it was there, hovering between them as if both had thought it. Who knew what Jake was thinking, but she felt it, knew it, and accepted that it was to be feared.
Love … After one night? She didn't think so.
She knew she had to move on. Somehow Jake seemed to have given her the strength to do just that, and she would not mess with it.
'I loved tonight,' she whispered. 'Tonight I loved you. But we both know our worlds don't fit together. Let's just accept tonight's magic and move on.'
'I'm not sure I can.' He was pushing open the door to her bedroom with his foot. 'To leave you here … '
'It's what I want.' Was it? No, part of her was screaming, but the rest of her was sensible and it had to be sensible for all of her.
'You're so … '
'And so are you.' And then she paused. They both paused.
Tori's room was right at the end of the house. The room next to hers was Doreen's. From the other side of the wall came the muffled sound of terror. Whimpering, sobs of fear. Real pain.
They couldn't ignore it. Neither of them could. Tori slid down from Jake's arms and slipped Rusty onto the bed, but before she'd straightened Jake was heading out the door.
She reached him before he reached Doreen's door, tugging him back.
'Let me. She knows me.' She knocked. 'Doreen, it's Tori. Can I come in?'
'I … No. Oh, my dear, did I wake you?' It was a breathless gasp. 'I'm so sorry.'
For answer Tori opened the door a sliver. Jake was beside her, but she motioned him to stay where he was. She slipped in, but she left the door open, just a little, so Jake could hear.
'Doreen, what's wrong?' she asked, and then, as her eyes grew accustomed to the dim light and she made out the figure huddled among the vast nest of pillows, her heart wrenched. She was with her in a heartbeat, gathering the elderly woman to her, simply holding.
'Oh, my dear, don't tell Glenda,' Doreen gasped.
Jake stayed outside, silent as a panther. She couldn't hear him, but she knew he was there, waiting to see if he was needed.
'You mustn't tell Glenda,' Doreen gasped again. 'She's asleep at last. It's just angina. Nothing. It hurts and I wake up and you know how the night terrors take over.'
Of course she did. Night terrors must surely be reality for every person who'd been on the ridge that day, Tori thought. But as she held her, as she felt her thin frame shake, she thought this was more than nightmares. And maybe more than angina, too? Her hands were cold and sweaty and she could feel her tremors. She put her fingers on her neck, finding her carotid pulse. It was fast, erratic, frightening.
'Doreen, I'm not sure this is just angina,' she said, trying to keep her voice steady, not wanting to put fear into the equation as well. 'I think we should get this checked. Can I call an ambulance?'
'No!'
'At least let me call Jake.'
'No,' Doreen whispered, but she said it much less force-fully-and then she stopped breathing.
One minute she was sitting on the edge of her bed, half supported by Tori. The next she simply swayed backwards, falling onto her pillows, unconscious.
Tori's fingers had been on her neck, feeling her pulse. Her hand followed her down-and there was no longer a pulse.
Doreen had said not to call Jake. That was five seconds ago. This was now.
'Jake,' she yelled at the top of her lungs. 'Jake, I need you now.'
He was with her before she'd stopped yelling. She was still searching for a pulse, but with her other hand she was hauling Doreen's legs back onto the bed, shoving away the bedclothes that were half covering her.