Darkness glanced at the numbers written on it. “What is this?”
“The access code to the camera feeds we set up outside Katrina Perkins’ house. I didn’t remove them. The interior cameras were stripped but you’ll have a full view of the front and back of the property.”
Darkness pocketed the card. “Why did you leave them?”
Snow hesitated. “I liked Missy. She was sweet and I wanted to keep an eye on her. I think it matters more to you than me. I frightened her too much to pique her interest.”
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” Snow looked as if he wanted to say more.
“What?”
“You had a female. Why give her up? Was it due to all she’d lose coming to be a part of our world?”
“I’m not a fit mate.”
Understanding dawned in the other’s male’s face. “It’s difficult to get over the past. There’s no point of a future if you can’t let it go.”
“It’s not that simple.”
“We adapt,” Snow reminded him. “We aspire to always become more than we were meant to be. Don’t you hold that goal as well?”
“I’m too damaged.”
Snow nodded. “All of us are to certain degrees. Some damage is visual, some scarred deep into our souls. It’s part of being Species. You are not the least likely male I’ve met to take a mate. Valiant has Tammy.”
“He at least was willing to take a mate.”
“Willing and being able to succeed are two different things. They made it work. That’s one male I couldn’t live with.” Snow smiled. “Do you think she’s deafened by now, hearing his roars? He isn’t the most patient or calm male.”
“He wouldn’t frighten her.”
“He scares me, along with the Wild Zone residents and they aren’t exactly what I would consider sane. It speaks volumes, doesn’t it?”
Darkness had a flashback of a moment with Kat. He could almost hear her voice. We have two volumes. High or mute. “I’m not him.”
“You’re more rational. He allows his feelings out in a big way. Too much so. He doesn’t know balance.”
“Nor do I.”
“Have you tried?”
“I’m not going to discuss this.”
“You care about that female. It’s a fact. Have you considered that she’ll meet some human? What if he hurts her? Humans can cheat on a female. They carry sexual diseases too. I went to one of her classes. Domestic violence is a problem in their world. I’d guess she wouldn’t seek a weak male to breed with. He could do serious damage or kill her.”
“Enough.” The things Snow described enraged him.
“Have you watched their news? They showcase home-invasion robberies, rapes, murders and random acts of violence. We don’t have those issues inside our borders. The walls around us protect our females from the violence of the out world. It’s our duty as males to keep them safe. Your female isn’t here.”
“She isn’t my female,” he snarled.
Snow smiled. “You wouldn’t have lost your temper before meeting her. You would have calmly corrected me. She’s already changed you.”
“I’m the same male.”
Snow shook his head. “Perhaps you should go home and take a good look in a mirror. You’re in denial. Lie to others but not to yourself.”
Darkness watched the officer stalk away. He clenched his fists, angry. Everyone kept giving him advice and that wasn’t the first time he’d been accused of not being honest. He went home and slammed the door. Faint trances of Kat’s scent lingered in the bedroom. He breathed through his mouth and entered the bathroom, flipping on the light. He gripped the counter, leaned in to take Snow’s advice.
The same male stared back at him in the mirror. He noticed no physical changes. He had forgotten to get his hair cut, the strands now long enough to rest on his shoulders. The last thing he wanted was to resemble Fury or the brothers he’d once lost. He made a mental note to get that done soon and strode into his bedroom. He studied the bed, memories of Kat unavoidable.
He missed her. It would fade over time and he’d get back into his normal routine. Go to work, come home and be alone. He’d stare at the ceiling until he fell asleep. Nightmares would wake him at some point. He’d shower and begin his day over. It had become an endless cycle that no longer held any appeal.
“Son of a bitch,” he rasped.
He opened the closet and withdrew a locked case. Kat hadn’t attempted to open it. He’d checked. He put in the right combination and withdrew the laptop. Within minutes he had it plugged in and pulled up the secure feed—the front and back views of Kat’s home on split screen. He removed his boots, got comfortable and sat on the bed, placing the device on his lap.
There was no sign of life until the sun went down. Lights came on and off in the house, allowing him to track movement. A blonde woman paused in front of a lit window on the second floor in the front. That had to be Missy. She peered out and turned, her lips moving.
Darkness hated the way he hoped Kat would step into sight. The light went off and time passed. He got up and fixed a light meal. Returning to the bedroom, he ate while keeping watch over Kat’s home. The laptop fit well on the nightstand, facing his bed.The phone rang and he answered. “Darkness.”
“How are you?”
“I’m fine, Fury.”
“Would you like to come over for dinner?”
“I already ate.”
“You could join us tomorrow.”
“I’m on duty tomorrow night.”
Fury sighed. “I’ll call again in a few days.”
“You do that.” He hung up and put on silky pajama bottoms.
It was early but he lay down and turned on his side, his attention on the laptop screen. He might not allow himself to be part of her life but he felt better watching over her. It beat staring at the ceiling. That excuse made him feel better.
Chapter Twenty-One
“I’ll get it! It’s for me,” Missy called out from her office.
Kat glanced at the clock over the stove. It was past eleven. She wondered if Missy had a late-night craving for pizza or Chinese food. They’d eaten dinner early and her friend was determined to write most of the night away. It usually annoyed her when they got food deliveries so late but she didn’t have to go to work early in the morning.
“Yeah, it’s my food,” Missy yelled.
Kat poured a glass of milk and took a sip. She’d said goodbye to Darkness and filed her report about Robert Mason. It hadn’t been her best day. The front door closed, the sound soft but distinctive.
“This smells so good.” Missy walked in carrying a pizza box. “Want some?”
“Nope. I’m going to bed in a few minutes.”
“I ordered extra bacon and cheese.”
Kat grinned. “You’re such a bitch. It will go from my lips directly to my hips if I eat this late.”
“So what?”
“Give me one piece.” Kat set down her glass and grabbed two paper plates from the cabinet. “A small one.”
Missy dished it out. “Are you okay? You’ve been in a foul mood since you got home from work.”
“They brought in a new guy to take over Mason’s position. He’s pissed. I got a lecture and had to file a very detailed report. I’m suspended with pay. They are going to call me when they are done with the investigation.”
“Did they suspend the other agents sent to Homeland?”
She took a bite and chewed. “Yeah. Chavez was furious that any of us would, and I quote, ‘listen to a moron’. I had to agree. I should have flat-out refused to go undercover but we were all between a rock and a hard place.”
“Screwed if you do, screwed if you refused direct orders.”
“Exactly.”
Missy grabbed a soda. “I’m going to eat in my office. Do you want to join me?”
“No. I know you need to finish your book and send it to your editor.”
“I’ve got three days to hit this deadline and I don’t think I’m going to get much sleep. It’s for an anthology series so it has to be in or my story won’t make the cutoff date. They’ll have to pick someone else to be a part of it.”
Kat lifted her plate and glass. “I’m going to bed. I’ll see you in the morning. Try to get some sleep, okay?”
“Yeah. Can you check on Gus and Butch on your way?”
“They are probably sleeping. I swear you own the laziest pets ever.”
Missy chuckled. “They turn hyper in the middle of the night. It’s a good thing I keep odd hours.”
Kat headed upstairs and stopped at Missy’s door to peek in. The dog slept on Missy’s pillow but the kitten was on the floor, chewing one of Missy’s shoes. Kat winced, grateful it wasn’t one of hers. She closed the door to keep the little destroyer of fashion from going to her bedroom next.
The doorbell rang again. Kat turned.
“I’ve got it,” Missy yelled. “It’s probably the pizza guy again. I asked for sauce but he didn’t bring it. He must have just remembered.”
Kat went to her room. She flipped on the light with her elbow and crossed the room to her night table. She placed her food down. The front door slammed loudly. She paused, listening. Missy didn’t call out. That was odd. Her friend always let her know who’d been at the door. It was a habit Kat insisted on.