Darkness (New Species #12)(55)

“Are you asking me to keep living with you?”
“No. You’d be assigned your own home. I could visit you after my shifts sometimes.”
“I see.” She relaxed. “You’d be able to fuck me and then leave whenever you were in the mood.” Her wounded tone indicated that wasn’t an option.
“I can’t offer you more.”
She pushed him and he dropped his arm. She rolled away and scooted to the other side of the bed. “I’m tired.”
“Is that not enough for you?”
“You know the answer already. You’re a bright guy. Good night.”
She pulled up the covers, hiding her body from his view. The way she drew her knees up and kept her back to him left no doubt that she didn’t want to be touched. He was disappointed but not surprised. Kat wanted a male who could give her all the things she needed. That would never be him.
He stretched out on the opposite side of the bed, flat on his back and stared up at the ceiling as he’d done thousands of times before. The sound of her ragged breathing hurt him. She didn’t cry but her distress was clear. He’d let her down.
“I’m sorry.” They were tough words to say.
She sniffed. “Don’t be. I was the one who wanted to change things.” 
He wanted to reach out and touch her. He didn’t. “You deserve better.”
“I agree.”
He shifted his focus back to the ceiling. Her breathing eventually slowed and he knew she slept. He couldn’t find that peace from his turbulent thoughts. It took awhile but he finally nodded off…
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Kat straddled his lap, grinning down at him. She was naked, her breasts bare. He reached up and palmed them. She arched her back, pressing against his touch more firmly. They were both bare. His dick was hard when Kat wrapped her fingers around the shaft. She lifted, adjusted the position of his dick and sank down on him.
He groaned at the feel of her hot, wet pussy. Tight. He stared at her face. She was stunning. Her cheeks were flushed with passion, her beautiful eyes half closed. She held his gaze and moved on him, taking more of his dick, lifting up, slamming down. The pleasure tore through him until he couldn’t remain still any longer. He trailed his hands down over her ribs, curved them around her hips and held her there while he thrust upward, fucking her harder and deeper. Moans tore from her parted lips, driving him on.
Kat leaned forward and her hand stroked his stomach then upward to play with one of his nipples. She pinched the tip between her forefinger and thumb. The sharp sensation almost made him come but she wasn’t there yet. He clenched his teeth, ignoring the way his nuts tightened and wanted to explode. He adjusted his hold on her and pressed his thumb against her clit, rubbing.
Kat moaned louder and her pussy tightened almost painfully around his shaft. She reached up near his head with her other hand. He thought she planned to grab hold of his shoulder for support but she clutched the pillow under his head instead. He closed his eyes, just enjoying the feel of being inside her, of having her ride him.
“Darkness?”
He opened his eyes at the sexy sound of her voice but it wasn’t Kat on top of him anymore—Galina straddled him. She held a knife in her hand and the blade reflected light as it arched downward. The tip of it buried deep in his chest. Agony ripped through him and he roared out from the force of it…
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“Darkness!”
Kat’s voice came from his right and she clutched his biceps. He was sitting upright in the dark, on his bed. He was breathing heavily and sweat soaked his body. He’d had a nightmare. It was fresh, crisp in his mind. It took every ounce of control not to strike out. He locked his body into position, only allowing the movement of his chest as he panted.
“Are you okay? I think you were having a nightmare.” She rubbed his arm.
“Don’t,” he managed to get out. He fought the urge to knock her away. “Stop touching me.”
It helped when Kat pulled her hand away but it could have resulted in tragedy. He might have attacked Kat. His chest was intact. His heart was not pierced by Galina’s blade. She was dead. He’d killed her. It wasn’t her in his bed.
“Try to slow your breathing,” Kat murmured. “It’s okay.”
He lunged to the left and stood. “I have to go.”
He bent, grabbed his discarded clothing and fled the bedroom. He just put on his pants, carrying his shirt out of the apartment. He needed to distance himself from Kat. He could have killed her. He wasn’t fit for a relationship with a female.
Chapter Twenty

Kat’s mood was grim as she waited for the blonde doctor to enter the exam room. She glanced at the clock on the wall. The minutes ticked by slowly and she was certain that had been the longest twenty minutes of her life. The door opened and she tensed. It wasn’t Doc Alli, as she had introduced herself, who entered. Darkness stepped inside the room.He looked handsome in his uniform. His features were harsh though, and his dark gaze pinned her where she sat on the padded exam table. “Hello.”
That’s all he has to say to me? She hadn’t seen him since he’d rushed out of his bedroom the night before last. Later Field had shown up, looking apologetic and regretful, to inform her that he’d been instructed to move her to guest housing.
Darkness no longer wanted her in his home. It had hurt but she hadn’t been that surprised. “Should I thank you for showing up to get the results?”
“Have you found out yet?”
She shook her head. “Still waiting.”
He leaned against the wall and crossed one boot over the other. His silence pissed her off. She managed to remain seated but was tempted to stroll the five-foot distance between them and smack him. It might have felt good but in the end, she used words instead.
“Next time have the balls to kick a woman out of your place yourself.”
He frowned.
“You heard me.”
“I felt it was best to have a clean break.”
“What are you going to do if I’m pregnant?” She arched an eyebrow.
He growled and looked away. “I don’t know.”
“Me neither. We agree on something else.”
“You and the child would be taken care of.”
“That had better not be a threat.”
His dark skin paled slightly and he glared at her. “You know I’d never harm you or allow anyone else to. I meant the NSO and I would make sure you were both provided for and protected.”
“From a distance.”
“You would stay at Homeland or Reservation.”
“I take it that, wherever I chose, you’d be in the other location?”
He said nothing. It answered her question. She’d pegged it right. The door opened and Doc Alli entered. “The pregnancy test is negative.” She folded her hands as if she were nervous, glancing between the two of them. “I’ll leave now.” She turned to go.
“Are you sure?” Darkness pushed away from the wall.
“Yes.” The blonde paused. “I’m certain. The hormone levels would have been spiked if she were carrying a Species baby. I could do an ultrasound but it’s not necessary.”
“Thank you.” Darkness allowed her to leave.
The door closed and Kat slid off the edge of the table, her legs feeling a bit shaky. She hated the disappointment she felt at the news. It would have been the worst circumstances to have a baby but part of her had started to warm to the idea. Another part of her was thankful. Darkness would get his wish. They had a clean break. There was nothing to bind them together. 
“That’s good.”
She peered up at him. Is he trying to convince me or himself? “I won’t keep you from your celebration. I have a taxi to catch.” She walked to the door and gripped the handle.
Darkness suddenly stepped behind her and flattened his hand on the door to keep it shut. She could feel him close. If she turned, they would have touched. It kept her still, wondering why he wasn’t opening the door for her.
“Kat,” he rasped.
Tears filled her eyes. She hoped he’d say he was willing to try to have a real relationship with her, that he’d changed his mind. She wasn’t going to hold her breath. “What?”
“Have you considered the job with the NSO?”
She refused to face him. “I have. I appreciate the offer, but no. I’ll either stay with the FBI if they allow it or find work somewhere else after the investigation is complete. I’m going in later today to speak to the supervisor in charge. I plan to go home first and get some real clothes.” She glanced down at the NSO-issued T-shirt and sweatpants, minus their logo. “This isn’t my best dress-to-impress look.”
“Do you need anything?”
A long list formed in her head, starting with him dropping to his knees and begging her to stay. “Nope. The NSO assured me they’d pay for a taxi to take me home. That’s all I need. My escort is going to take me from here right to one of the side gates. They wanted to avoid anyone seeing me leave.”
“I…”
She blinked back tears and turned. He was so tall and big. She’d always remember that about him. And the way he always smelled so good. “You what?”
Pain flashed in his eyes or maybe that was wishful thinking on her part. “I wish you well, Kat.”
“You too.” She spun. “I have to go if that’s all you want to say.”